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June - August 2002 (Fuck The Bronte Sisters)

8-29-02 I had a dream I was Janet Reno last night. I was arguing with my mom (as Janet Reno) about how I was going to beat Dick Cheney in the Florida election. There are several things wrong with that, not least among those things being I had a fucking dream I was Janet Reno!!! What the fuck?!!!!!


8-28-02 It's official. I need to do a site reorg. Heheheheh. Hope everybody who visits knows who's who now. Had to jump on the bandwagon.


8-27-02 I random You. I was feeling Nostalgic so I stole that makeshift jpeg from a German fan page of Ende's brainchild, that Wolfgang Petersen did pull apart from the original book, making it his own. Wolfgang Petersen is the shit, yo. Haven't read the book, though. I really, really like Falcor. Wish I could meet him. He's the fuckin' bomb, yo. They don't dream 'em like him anymore. Yep. Gonna find solitude and my power animal and stuff. I am saying garg.


8-27-02

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon Symbolism: More Symbolism Than You Can Shake a Stick At
Ever been fucked by a wild bear in the outback? find out!


8-27-02 From The Onion:

"DVD Tries To Pass Off 'Language Options,' 'Scene Selection' As Special Features PLANO, TX—The recently released Joe Somebody DVD attempts to pass off "language options" and "scene selection" as special features, an unhappy buyer reported Monday. "What the hell?" said Plano, TX, resident Bill Vinson, who was hoping for never-before-seen outtakes or director's commentary. "While they're at it, why don't they boast that it features 'complete credits' and a special 'pause option'? Christ."

Ya goddamned right.


8-27-02 Rhys, don't forget to post about the guy in the mini-van who could play harmonica and drive at the same time. Or something like that. And Holly, I'm afraid that Hybrid date for the Globe Theatre performance is indeed in October. Don't fear, little petal, the shadow doesn't hold sway just yet. Elaborate update in the works. Check this bizziny biznatch for the skizzinzy k'naaalidge(gettin' things with a degree, that ja can't get in colladge...). <------Paraphrased like a motherfucker.


8-23-02 Yay, Bass! Boom.


8-22-02 Booyah!


8-20-02 WOw! Did I really win the Snark contest? Bonus! I Own. I'm all moved back in, and I have a few things to say that should wrap this summer right up, for me anyway. This weekend in Chattanooga was a strange but wonderful one. I hope that all the pursuant drama has abated that came from that weekend, whether or not you were in The Ridge or in Chattanooge. Nick, I hope you know that our talk meant a lot to me. I have no real immediate way of showing it, but that's just my nature. Same goes to you Rae and Mike. and Rhys. And Holly. And Erin. And Cofer. Cofer only said a few words, but they were just as important to me. Ugh, though. As much as I appreciate the support I get from my friends it troubles me that I need this kind of support at all. My whole life I've been a victim of my own petty isolation. Hold on for a second, don't flinch. There's a difference between bitchery and analysis. The attitude laid out by the passing of such an observation is not written in code or hidden in the margins. It's just a consecutive series of letters that coalesce into the transmission of a simple thought. And as it stands, this particular thought weighs about as much as its sylables on their cumulative own. It requires this much wordiness to elaborate the mental state that derived such a statement from me. So chill the fuck out. I'm fine. Just commenting that I'm twenty years old, unfinished, sort of unstarted, and Nick said something to me I'll never forget. Whatever is holding me back, is my issue, not the world's. So perhaps I can take some solace in the thought that my own personal choice will illuminate my path. Or perhaps I'll pussy out on you, Marvin. But time will tell. Thanks, friends.


8-19-02 Wheeeee!.


8-15-02 Word.

DJWanaB asked, "What do you think about the RIAA's latest crackdown not only on peer-to-peer file sharing systems but now on individual file swappers?"

BT: "They suck! I mean, if they're going to watch this video, I'm gonna show them my ass. I hate the RIAA." "....the RIAA sucks, dude! They suck balls. I hate them. Screw them!" --BT

FUckin' Word.


8-15-02 Ever been sure that chaos was a constant? It's a weird revelation, and I'm sure you've all found it in some way in your daily affairs, whether or not you'd codify it as chaos. I'd say it takes on an unwavering and certain form in your minds. I say this in the hope that I'm not entirely alone here. Or perhaps it would be more prudent to say that I'm saying that in the hopes that I don't exist in that mass-pool of peoples whom have never been able to find discipline and order, and most certainly will not make it. Ah, there it is, then. The nature of the post; I'm pissed about something, eh? Nah. Just had a lot of time to think lately. Spent the last month and a half buried inside my mind searching for and ordered way to transform myself. I alternate between hopelessness as a result of analysis of my faults, and sheer unadulterated confidence in my abilities, as little as they've been developed thus far. It alternates. I swear, it's a chemical thing, or a lack of sleep thing, or a lack of exercise thing offset suddenly into the positive zone by a cookie, or maybe just an idea. Whatever, be it a cookie or sudden inspiration, I wish that side of me was the constant. Then I'd have a better chance. As it stands now, I'm halfway between being excited for the future and terrified that I'm not going to have composure and the bravery to meet the people and find the sources I'll need. Seeing as how I'm doing such a killer job of writing about all this in the broad strokes without the will or the resources to deal in the specifics, I'm sure as hell that I'm not at all ready yet. But if articulation be an armor, then perhaps I can furnish more of it out of actual substance. Then I'll be fuckin' dandy. Shot some guns yesterday. Surreal experience, mostly because I dealt with it in a much less nervous and clumsy manner than I thought I would. Guess something clicks on inside you when dealing with a deadly machine. The pressure of the reverberations and the gun powder eventually got to my head, and I was pretty fuckin' tired for the rest of the day. Had a bit of a headache, so I didn't go out to Barley's. Sorry, Alex, I wanted to see you, but felt absolutely dead. Have a safe journey. Sorry if I snapped at you Holly, but for some reason I couldn't even think to mention that I had a headache when you called. Don't understand the things I leave out. Anyways, gotta get a haircut now.


8-14-02 Neat!. Make sure you scroll down and read the sampling of director's picks. A veritable list, that. And in keeping with my culturati status, I must happily and not so humbly report that I've seen more than half of the films presented. Heh. Bertolluci put Blue Velvet on his list. How drolll....


8-8-02Aardvarks? Oh yeah, Trivial Pursuit and 2:00AM funnies make strange bedfellows.


8-8-02 Ah what I wouldn't give for it to be true. Something Awful has a bunch of these, of which most of them well deserve their makers a one-way ticket straight to hell. But at least somebody made this one. That's funnier than words can describe.


8-6-02 Hey there, updating from Nick's house. I'm here allllll alone. And I found this in his history scroll-bar. Never heard of this guy before, but am interested in somehow finding his movies. Goddamned Czech-oppression. Also, had a startling thought here a second ago. Since I started working, I've worn a plaid shirt all of once. Possibly twice, but I ain't so sure. What the fuck?


8-3-02 Claire, I don't know why I didn't link you yet. Cheers! Thanks for the line.


8-2-02 Ha! Breakbeat fans can be soooo ridiculous......Look how quickly this degenerates into name-calling.


7-30-02 Woah now, weirdest fuckin' Weekly Review, ever!


7-29-02 Nick, safe journey to you. Lookin' forward to your momentous return.


7-28-02 So, if I haven't seen Orgazmo, I'm either really young or really naive? Heheheh.....


7-26-02 You know, Holly, I think you might be on to something. Colin Farrel could play Jesse Custer, judging by his voice talent alone. He can swing an American accent like it was goin' out of style, so if he can get the southern twang down and work on the word of God, he may just be perfect for it. He's sure as shit got the eyes for JC. But here's what I'm gonna bowl you over with, and it certainly has a symmetrical relationship to recent revelations: Cassidy shall be portrayed by Jude Law. And that's just too fuckin' perfect. Look at him. He's got the smile.


7-24-02 You JUSt Cant' keep Keep Runnin' Away...Growwwwllllll.....


7-23-02 Don't take this too seriously. I just find it odd and funny. God bless Engrish.


7-23-02 Oh yeah, to say that I 'slugged it out with Holly' was just to say that I toughed out the harsh, barren Disc Exchange parking lot with her 'til the tow-truck arrived. We didn't beat the shit out of each other. That time. Check out her Banter page. Comic gold, people.


7-23-02

In a fit of Caucasian Hubris......

Where do I begin in recapping recent events? Dear lord, it's like cataloguing soooo much, man, like shit, dog....Well, actually, it may or may not have been that much, but to the grey matter underneath the plastic hull it seems an awful lot like an awful lot. Forgive the bugfuck-speak; it's late. Inbetwizt workin' a dank and not-so-sexy theater sweeping job, akin to being in a pavillion of dental originality moshed with smells that remind one of a band-ride through cow-country (I'm lookin' at you, trips to Soddy-Daisy), I found the time between last Wednesday night to hang out with my peeps, discover that Knoxville had a connection on-tap of the primary source of my sanity, a rich yet concise collection of breakbeat which will sooth the soul and be easy on the wallet, see a God amongst sampling men, and work some more. That sentence liked itself too much. You must spank it with your eyes. Go back and read it again, but avoiding reading all the antecedents. Watch a sentence cry, it's fun. Anyway, back up twelve parsecs, cue Brandon's house. Drunken Will grabbing my ass, very weird. Brandon has copy of One Dead Jedi's Already Dead on vinyl. A sign of breakbeat cognizance in Knoxville?!!! Fuck me, Brandon, we be headin' out. So we did. I scored two great ILS records and a dud I will henceforth return for the Kasha record I shoulda bought. That night, Holly's car broke down in front of the disc Exchange, and Jo(H)n Wagner (H or not?) came and picked up Brandon so he wouldn't be late for the show at the Playhouse. Jo(H)n is a good friend indeed. Good man. I slugged it out with Holly, and we ended up having a grand, strange evening with a tow-truck driver name Carl who stopped at a Sonic in Harrimon to see about getting some $1500 from his ex-girlfriend that she owed him. It was funny. Thankfully it wasn't a fight. Saturday night, a bunch of went to see Moby. My brother came along. It was his first concert. I'm glad to have been there with him, and I'm sorry he got separated. Anytime you wanna come with, you're gladly welcome, Josh. Wish you coulda been there, Brock, youda loved it. I wish I was still there. FIND MY BABY. JAMES BOND THEME. HONEY. And Dirty Vegas did a cover version of Another Brick IN THe Wall. So cool be cool. It's been a blast of a week, and it could get even better. Nick is coming back in just seven days. Damn. I can't wait, man. Anyway, yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwnnnn...me sooooooo tired.....


7-16-02 Chuck? Ride The Snake...... Are you really under the weather? Ride the Snake..........


7-15-02 Well, my brother went home. I kind of wish I could introduce him to some of you. If you want to know how my obsessions were formed, you can find out a good deal of it from talking to him. Brock, I wish you could come back so we could spend more time at Magic Wok and watching Danish films, though the latter was admittedly my idea. Hope you like all the music you got, and just so you know, Vespertine is really cool. I missed you as soon as you were gone, as it has always happened since you had to go live with your mom all those years ago. I wish you and Stepheny could be here all the time, which reminds me, I really gotta email her ass. I'm sorry chemistry sucks, Steph, but I guess it always has. While Brock was here, he got a buttload of trade credit at Mr.K's and he used some of it on me and Josh. Seems I ended up with The English Patient, Woody Allen's Getting Even, A Salmon Rushdie book, and Mansfield Park. How? How? Why do I have this compelling urge to read Jane Austen? WHAT THE FUCK ?!! I know I shouldn't, but I must......Agh! WHy? FUCK! I loved EMMA! Loved it! Am I dying? Mommy?


7-15-02 Whoops!


7-15-02 "You egg-bearing creatures, always belaboring the point that the male labia doesn't have a natural lubricant. I'm not shoving pizza up my ass, goddammit." This is a snippet from a conversation I just had with Holly over the phone. Ask not.


7-11-02 It's very rarely that my adamentium shell yields the soft yellow spot on my belly to which an arrow can traverse distances resulting from a bird's flight to a bow-in-tow-man's ear, but hey, sometimes some people find it unexpectedly (leading me inexorably to poorly thought out cultural references) and slay me. Sometimes the same people can help to unburden it afterwards. Thanks, Holly. You know not what you'd done, but cared enough to more than make up for it. Twas just a little thing anyways, and such things ultimately give us substance. Or maybe we're all just too hip to be happy, but that alone will make for a bitchin' tale told of a whale. (Jesus, enough with the fuggin' references!)


7-10-02 I'm genuinely unsure as to whether or not I am in any decent mental state to write right now, but seeing as I have to go back and correct every piddly mistake I make simply typing this out, I should consider that a sign. I have a myriad of problems to deal with. And I'm not usually one to let little things get to me, but sometimes the sheer weight of my ineptitude comes crashing down at the drop of even the slightest ball. I wish I was more ready for the world, and for things that come as second nature to most. I'm really very alone, as I have always been, and that's looming around to nearly becoming problem number one. I'd love some confidence. I'm afraid I'm becoming torn between finding it by myself at this point, or relying on support from others to influence it. And the bugger of it is I'm pretty sure I'm not the kind to derive one without the other. Before it appears to you that I've suddenly saddled on you basically a downer post, can I please assure you that the truth is the truth, whether I tell it to you or not? Would that be enough to appease those who would roll their eyes? I don't come to the lair of the Plaid Avenger to hear about his troubles! He should be as capable as the rest of us, and as self-assure as all of his friends! Bunch of shit, that. I know it may be kind of dangerous to allow a webpage to become a place to lay down what's demonizing you, taking place of the more palpable and urgently more needed outlet of human intervention. And hey, since that's the case, you'll only get this sort of thing maybe once every few months. Fun for you. Now everybody go catch up on Nick. The Islamic Expatriot is havin' himself a blast down in the Isle De Margaritas. And he's bitchin' because he hasn't seen a movie in a theatre since LOTR. Heh. Gorsh. Happy Birthday to you, Nick.


7-9-02 Agh! Adam,Chic O La is best minimal house-tech-funk-music ever! EVER! It's fuckin' rad for at least 4 minutes. Then it gets stuck or something.


7-7-02 Before I hop along to my fifth double in a row, I have a quick anecdote to relate to you that may be wholly irrelevant, but entirely prudent to share with you nonetheless. As I was tearing tickets yesterday, approaching were two skankily-clad teenagers, a boy and girl, chains for the wallet and gloss for the orifices, and what twinkled from the corner of their conversation was this: "At least we're not going to see that O Brother, Where Art Thou? shit. My God, that was the GAYEST movie ever!" O' weep for this sad, sad world occasionally, ok? Want some gopher? Sigh....


7-6-02 HA!. Now there's an album cover. Or at least a poster, that is, if the two of us ever collaborate on anything. By the way, 5 doubles in a row licks balls.


7-2-02 New Section added. Update goooood....napster.....baaaddddd.....


7-2-02 There you go, shifty bitches.....


7-2-02 My eldest sibling Brock has achieved the Nirvana like state of winning things. Wicked-hella-cool!


7-2-02 Yes, Chuck, I am indeed coming in for work on Wednesday. The twenty greenbacks will be yours in a fortnight. Or possibly sooner. Whatever. Hey man, if I'm ever unsure of my schedule, will you like sign my guestbook for me and remind me? How's that gonna work out? These Movie theatre peoples don't know what's about to happen to 'em. They gonna have to deal with the awesome power of Bastard Jaxx and Resident Plaid Claid Cock Gay Guy. By the way, Nick, what the fuck is claid, anyway? Did you mean clad? I'm just goin' by cut and paste, yo. Sort of.


7-1-02 Checknizy shiznit out. It'll be up and running this weekend. Damn I wish it would actually storm instead of just puttering out. This one was gearing to be so beautiful. Typical Oak Rigde weather. Can't get it up.


6-30-02 Last updated at 4:50 AM.....So I'm up and about at five in the frikkin' morning. I'm exhausted but I can't sleep. It's my body's way of saying, 'fuck you, mister bear, you speak lies!' I correct you now, is what I believe my body is saying. Your sleeping patterns will be re-alligned. And here I am cruising the web looking for porn and surcease. Porn and surcease I tell you! Well, fuck you, body. I'm gonna drink a whole cherry coke and not burn off the 150 calories! That'll fuckin' teach you, You fat 1/5 of a quarter-irish-krystal-chick-sucking demon. Hey, damn I could go for summadatshit rightabout now........


6-26-02 There are other directors besides Spielberg, right? Heh.


6-25-02 I have a few more thoughts on Minority Report that I forgot to submit to you after my second viewing. This is a damn-near perfect film, if you ask me. Tom Cruise has seldom been more, simply put, watchable. He has a forcefullness that the part requires. He comports himself with a very matter-of-fact and stoic approach to what's happening around him, until he's required to be strung out and emotionally drained, and that's really saying something. He acts this part with wit rather than hamming it up. I think he's a damn-fine actor. He knows what he's doing. The film was just as exhilirating the second time, until the end. Report is a whodunit, and at the end of the film, the loose ties are less of a rush than during the first. Goes without saying, I suppose, but this is a filmmaking with an operatic sense of purpose, much like Spielberg's best work. It doesn't beat AI in terms of ideas or sentiment, but it doesn't have to. I always find diverse reactions to great or challenging work amusing, so go check out Holly's compilation of messageboard threads at Ain't It Cool News. I must come to Harry's defense on this one, even if I disagree with him; He's a passionate, honest film observer. He doesn't form his opinions to please or persuade you. He does the what an honest critic should do, which is to speak his perception of the truth. And when I agree with him, I'm happy to be in unison with a man who is more adament sometimes about this shit than I am.


6-25-02 Whooooo! Random Poll!


6-24-02 Hey, sister Stepheny, I can't seem to find your email address. Anydamnplace. Grrr. Jadengems@what? Help a brutha out.


6-22-02 Go nuts.


6-22-02 A jedi shall not know love, nor anger, nor fear. Cross-pollenate your mega-blockbuster today! It's fun!


6-22-02 That's it, sell your kidneys.


6-22-01 Wowwy fuck. Didn't like A.I.? No matter. Don't read that if you haven't seen Minority Report yet, but good grief what the hell are you waiting for?


6-21-02 YAy!! Element Of Crime finally came in the mail! Now I can finally show it to everyone (who has the patience)! Trust me, and I believe this would work as a considerably funny blurb for the adds, it's a film that could screw God into anyone. And how. (note: that's not just aimless blasphemy. That's blasphemy with a filmic connotation)


6-20-02 Yesss! Ha! If you type 'jack frost fucking care bears' into Google you get a hit to my page. Fuckin funny, I have no idea how.


6-19-02 The RIAA officially stump-fucked me. Personally. They haven't stopped a single download of a Britney Spears or Bruce Springstein album. Not one. What they have put a stop to is my ability to find rips of vinyl long out of print, or never even approaching Satellite distribution. With that said, I could be angrier, but something else'll pop up. It's not as important as Minority Report is to me right now. What does that have to do with the new index pic? I dunno. I think A.I. is underrated. Its only mistake is to eulogize Kubrick a little too much. Other than that, on repeated viewings, I'm finding it more and more compelling. Go rent it again, even if you hated every minute of it. It's Spielberg's Vertigo, I swear to God.


6-13-02 Go to KCRW and stream the BT and Adam Freeland sets.


6-13-02 Alejandro Jodorowsky, the Chilean director who filmed Santa Sangre, is currently developing a project called Abelcain, starring himself, and Marilyn Manson. The tagline: Cain and Abel will go to heaven, if they can make it through hell....... Well. Holy blood, I suppose.


6-8-02 Now that weeeeee found love what are we gonna dooooooooooooo with ittttttttttttt, etc etc ad infinitum.......


6-7-02 Heh. I found the first half of the bootleg we made in Atlanta on Audiogalaxy. Except it ain't there. Damn.


6-7-02 hahahahahahahhh! From the Hybrid Mailing List:

Does anybody have a tracklisting to the Atlanta set Hybrid played on 2/17/01? The one with two blokes being stupid over the recording (That's Mike Truman Up There!)? The song after the orb tune is cool.


6-5-02 Just watched Sexy Beast. Hmm....I'm gonna have night terrors. Good flick.


6-4-02 It was either this or 'that whole city is pictures of Jesus, and ham', which makes far less sense but is also quite amusing.


6-4-02 I was reading my sister's guestbook entries again and she said I used 'eloquent language', implying that I swear a whole golly gorsh-derned lot. Well, in the year I've had this page, I've only said the word fuck 336 times. That's it. 337. Fuck it, whatever. And 82 of those times were in response to ear-infection-infarction that stole BT from me. So I think I've been reserved and stylish thankyouverymuch. I agree with Nick. I will continue my life-long pursuit of clever profanity. My lexicon is larger than the average curmudgeon who can't let loose with a coupla fuck this's and fuck that'n.


6-4-02 Ya know, I don't usually like to quote the President, but Jesus McGillicuddy Christ!


6-1-02 Oh, hey there. Updated the archives. May was an ejaculatory month for this page. So I did some clean-up. Hope that colloquial effluvium served as a pertinent reminder of the child in all of us. And if you missed out on the link I posted yesterday, here it is again. Harry Knowles sums up the elation I felt after the midnight showing, and following every subsequent viewing.