I can't make myself smile.
I can't seem to feel happy.
All the pain I take to heart.
I bit my lip til blood is tasted
And I strain to keep tears from flooding.
I close my throat to keep from screaming.
I hope my breath to keep from shaking.
My face flushes and burns,
and my hand trembles from pressure.
Keeping control is worse than baring the pain.
Distractions don't help subside the anger.
Humiliation makes me want to pull out my hair.
Numbing maddness had set in.
I just wanted to be left alone.
A. Propst ©