It's Brit.
Once I made some cheese toast, and a sharp piece of crust cut my gum. Was it evil? I think so. Later, I was washing dishes, and a fork stabbed me. You see, the fork had touched the evil cheese toast, which in turn mad it an evil fork. Upon finishing those dishes and filling up the dish washer, I cut myself on a knife that had touched the evil cheese toast. Now you know why the dishes and food of your household are attacking you! Go, be afriad, be very afriad!! Rid the world of Furbies and Evil Cheese Toast!! Mwahahahaha!!!