Joshism is a fairly new religion that was created on March 24th of 2002. The principles are as follows...
You may ask "What is Josh?" Josh is achieved through inner strength, confidence, security and TRUE individuality. If you are real and secure with who you are (or so you may think) then THAT is Josh. If you are not afraid to be who you are then you are Josh. There are not many people who are real. Therefore there are not many Joshists. Everybody has "Josh" in them, but it is up to them to find it and let it out, for the whole world to see. Joshism has no room for fake people or those who conduct their lives in a certain way just to be trendy or "cool". Joshism is a great system of belief for those who do not wish to buy into the mainstream hooplah. There are no rules, commandments, requirements, biases, restrictions, etc. Joshism only has guidlines that can be taken and applied differently to everyone, because everybody is different. Joshism is not about or even really a religion. It is a mindset and a way to live. Joshism encourages thinking for yourself as well as out of the box.
II. Michael Is The Arch
An important concept of Joshism is that there are no gods or one specific god to worship. Michael is not a god, Joshists do not worship him. They simply respect him. Michael, the arch, is the reason Joshism was created. He inpired two girls (after giving them a good laugh) to take the simplistic concept of "Josh" and mold it into something bigger.
III. We All Dance
Dancing is a very important part of joshism, but is not neccessary or manditory. When feeling happy, excited, or just plain hyper, Joshists typically engage in a type of dance that involves rapid kicking of the feet (similar to skipping) and punching of the air with the fist. This dance is done to express immense exuberation about something, exprecially a good song. This dance is refered to as skanking, which is typically done to ska, reggae, and some punk rock. This is not the only dance Joshists can partake in. Any dance is jsut fine. The whole point is that we express our happiness, hyper acticity, etc. and do not care what the others around us feel about it. Joshists feel very strongly when it comes to self-expression in any form. Dancing is a type of this expression. The people of Joshism do not have to dance well. To all other Joshists, the bad dancers are just as good as the rest of us.
IV. Dan Is Very Josh
This is not exactly an important principle of Joshism. It did, however, come up when a band member felt quite angry at Joshism. He did not respect the Joshists belief noe did he hold back from showing his dissaproval of Joshism. Because of his actions, the only conclusion that can be made is that he is in very deep denial. 'Tis either this or he doesnt like the fact that he is in fact a Josh. Either way, he was extremely rude in pummeling our beliefs. Because of this we find it acceptable to mock Dan and call him "Josh" at any time possible. This is not manditory, only acceptable. Yes, this does create dispute, which Joshism does not encourage, but Dan already created the dispute so why not have a little fun with Dan's insecurity?
V. While In Competition, The Opposing Team Is Steve
Competition arrises at many points in ones life. Of course, Joshists compete also. Most Joshists only compete for fun. When a Joshist or a JOshists friend is in competition with someone the other person is known as Steve until the competition is over. Then the competitior is no longer Steve, unless they want to be.
VI. Cacti Fuckin' Rule!
A cactus is a symbol of JOshism. The cactus symbolizes JOshists unique views on things as well as their individualistic personalities and mindsets. Cactus green is also a very happy color; which is an important part of Joshism-being happy. A typical Joshist would more than likely have a cactus in their home-whether it be an eight foot paper cactus or a real one. This is absolutely not manditory but it is nice to have around. The prickly things on a cactus (whatever the hell they are called) symbolizes a Joshists though outer shell; shielding them from the propaganda and bullshit society tries to feed us everyday. It is very important to stress that this is by no means any fern of worship-worshiping things, people, etc. is not a part of Joshism. The cactus is merely a symbol, as stated before.
VII. Let People Come To You
An important thing to understand about Joshism is that bragging about being a Joshist, preaching to those who are uninterested or resulting to unfair, facist tactics to push Joshism onto others is highly unnaceptable. Let people come to you. If they know you are JOshist and are ineterested in learning about it, tell them everything they want to know without being forceful about it. Joshism wont spread and people wont be interested in it if you are a nazi about it. Joshism is an exellent system of belief because it has no obligations to act or live a ceratin way.
REVISIONS, ADDITIONS, AND COMMENTS...
This is where revisions and additions can be made to the already existing principles of Joshism. Comments and thoughts about Joshism and Joshists may also be written here. However, ignorant, immature and untasteful comments will be ignored. In order to accomidate the new revisions and additions, a new bible will be written and distributed when need be. Revisions and additions will be taken under advisement by Joshists two foundes to determine if they will be added to the bible. Since Joshists are open minded and accepting ofmost ideas, it is probable that most peoples revisions and additions will somehow be included, if not made into a new principle of Joshism. (if you are reading this online and would like to introduce an addition or revision to the bible, please email heather at luckylabs_214@yahoo.com or kala at ....)
Addition I - Almost Everyone Is Josh
Many Joshists address one another simply as "Josh". This is not manditory or even neccessary. Addressing one another in this manner is basically JOshist slang. It can be translated as "dude" "man" or whatever.
Addition II - Misconception or Manipulation
Manipulation or Misconception of Joshism principles is stickly denied. If there is any misconception at all, the confusion must be fixed. Manipulation of Joshism in any way shape or form is stickly forbidden. Anyone commiting this terrible feat will be punished with eternal damnnation. If the creators of Joshism are still alive when this terrible act takes place, Joshism will be revoked and people will no longer practice it. If the creators happen to pass before this act takes place, you will be haunted by horrible cacti horror dreams. Before you think about changing Joshism at all, remember... you were warned!
Addition III - Value The Sharpie!
For all of you who unaware, a Sharpie is a type of marker. The ruler of the marker empire even. It is ver convenient to always have a Sharpie. It has many important uses. One of which is vandalism. Anytime a Joshist comes up with a clever idea or statement, they can write it on the closet object, seeing as though Sharpies are able to write on many many many different surfaces, and the world will be a better place. This is not a demand to value the Sharpie, but simply a truth, a recognition, that Sharpie markers are awesome and deserve to be valued... choose your marker wisely....
The creators of Joshism are...
