*Here's*What*I*Learned*My*Freshman*Year*


by Becca

1. Schedule changes bring new fun (And new men), especially if you get six of them in one year

2. Never piss off your counsler

3. If you are female, getting hit on becomes an everyday routine. Don't worry about it unless your new "friends" try to eat you.

4. School dances suck. It's the getting ready, eating dinner, and after parties that are fun.

5. Never leave elementary! Just say kiddies just stay!

6. You're not as smart or as cool as you thought you were in junior high.

7. If he's stalking you, it's not considered mean to be a biscuit to him. Especially if he shows up at your house!

8. Don't fail. And if you are, kiss butt and work as hard as you can. Your teacher just might round your grade up, oh...three points higher.

9. In drill team, you wear more make up than you think.

10. If you think your biology teacher is on drugs, well you're right but not only that, she's an alcholic manwoman that has friends who die random and horrible deaths.

11. If you're going to finish the assignment the day it's due, try not to finish it in front of the teacher.

12. Always have some kind of theraputic release waiting for you when you get home

13. You don't have to go out EVERY FRIDAY NIGHT if you don't want to.

14. Boys suck. they suck suck suck suck suck suck suck suck. Never trust them.

15. If your maternal asian friend says your stalkee is gay, he probably is.

16. When making new friends try not to include that you have multiple personalities, you manipulate people into thinking you have an older brother, and you are stalked by various bands in the intial conversation.

17. Treasure your locker buddies. They will always be there for you, in homeroom, standirized testing, and by your locker. Unless they get a locker change, that is.

18. If you can't get a man, live viacriously through your happily dating friends.

19. When exam time rolls around, you better study.

20. Exemptions are probably one of the best things in your high school career.

21. Wouldn't it be nice to drive?

22. Some favorite school activities: 1. Penny Day 2. Themed Days 3. Sell a Senior Day and any other things that get you out of class. BUT BEWARE: Any pep rally or buy out that makes you pay two bucks and over IS NOT WORTH!

23. Surfer kids tell the best stories!

24. If you find yourself in the middle of a fight ring between two homies GET OUT!

25. Lunch is a very sacred time. So is studyhall.

26. If you eyes are leaking in the morning, put a ice cold wet wash cloth on them and potatoes.

27. The word cute should be abolished from the world.

28. Do not be a smart ass to teachers that hate you

29. Take advantage of teachers who let you go to the bathroom everyday

30.Studying for five hours and drinking coffee in the morning will make you a jittery, loud, frightening person that everyone will run to get away from

31. If you are scared you are going to fall down the stairs, you will fall down the stairs

32. Hall ways were not meant to be moshed in.

33. If you are going under a stair railing and wearing a lowcut shirt, cover up! If you are going up the stairs in a short skirt, well just be careful who's walking behind you.

35. There should be a Annual Gas Leak Day every year

36. Fire drills always happen at the most inopportune times. Especially if you are wearing spandex and barefoot. AND: If you are wearing spandex, don't be fooled by those "nice guys" who will let you cut in front of them.

37. Expect the unexpected

38. Nothing is just black and white. There's always a middle grey area.

39. Make sure when you leave the bathroom you are zipped up and there's not toilet paper on your foot. Make sure when you leave the cafeteria there is not food all over your face. And remember: Don't be scared of the lunchline!

40. You can only be yourself.