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The PuNk RaWk satire

   

       Now this may seem pointless and not 'funny' to a normal uneducated poser 'punker' (damn there's a lot of labeling and 'racism' in such a governmentless  punk society, isn't there? well i guess you've gotta give in to some hypocrisy cuz that's just the way people are) so on with the satire and if you don't know who joe strummer is, just go away.    

 

     I have always pondered where the true origin of Punk Rock was, little was I to know that my encounter with Joe Strummer would be so enlightening and soul searching.

    Joe Strummer grew up in suburban America (yes i know he is from england but this an american based band so leave me alone) like many of us protected and boring individuals, but in the prime of his adolescence an angel by the name of Stupidi came down and gave him a pair of magic glasses to read some secret tab of a lost clan of true hardcore punkers. After Joe Strummer read the first line of tab he discovered the golden chord, also known as the POWER CHORD. Unluckily the glasses were smashed in the pit at an insane FEAR show and the tab was burned as it was mistaken for an American Flag. But the spirit of punk rock and the angel, Stupidi, will live on.

    Two years after his pilgrimage to San Francisco to spread the word of Punkormin the stage was rushed by crazy libertarians and Joe Strummer was beat to death with a piece of meat from a huge racist  corporation based in a Singapore sweatshop.

 

    Alright so there you have it my little 'satire'  but i will probably have to explain the story behind this little piece of writing to the uneducated and ignorant half of the punk society (i'm sorry if i offended you, you straight-edge pussy, but you hardly know anything about life or society so quit crying, i'd call you a little girl but that wouldn't be PC) so on with my explanation the story of punk rock (yes it's fictitious) well it's told through the history of the mormon religion.  i chose this religion due to the ridiculous origin of the book of mormon.  also organized religion is good in that it gets people involved in church that otherwise wouldn't but is also bad because it fills people's minds with untrue propaganda with the intent of bringing donations to the church (e.g. the sale of indulgences in the medieval times through the utterly corrupt catholic church).

 

      So an angel by the name of Moroni came to Joseph Smith and gave him magic glasses to translate the tablets of the book of mormon and then mr smith 'lost' these magic glasses and the tablets and what was left was his translated version of the tablets now known as the book of mormon. joseph soon had a bunch of mormon followers that were forced to utah due to religious persecution (which is very bad in my opinion) and mr smith ended up in jail and was later pulled out of jail and lynched by an angry mob. 

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