Delusional Rants
So a couple of weeks ago I was sitting in my house, freezing as always b/c our heat doesn't work right, and I was passing the time by watching t.v.. So as Andy and I flipped around on the t.v. we came across some show, I don't remember something like Montel but it wasn't...so I see all these punk kids on the stage and I decided to watch...(I always do, I love those cheezy makeovers...Mom I'm punk make me look like a yuppie and shit). So anyway the show was about 2 murders...one being the murder of a 19 year old punk kid from Amarillo, TX by the name of Brian Deneke.
If you haven't already heard about this murder plan to be outraged. Okay here's the short version of what led to this kid's murder. The preppy kids decided to start a fight one night with the punk kids...it was something like 90 to 15 (w/ of course the punk kids being outnumbered)...so some of the punk kids did have baseball bats and chains...all I'm gonna say about that...when it's basically 10 to 1, I'd be arming myself too...anyway durring this fight 16 year old Dustin Camp drove his car around the fight aiming at the punk kids...Deneke was the 2nd kid to get hit...and as a result he died...
That night Camp went home and reportedly told his parents what happened...his parents didn't call the police...instead they waited for them to come and arrest thier son...Camp was charged with first degree murder based on statements given by those at the scene...At the trial one of Camp's friends that was in the car testified that not only did he not try to stop or even swerve he stated after he hit Deneke "I'm a ninja in my caddy"...he was convicted of involuntary manslaughter and sentenced to probation...
Now I don't know about any of you but this more than pisses me off...I am outraged...when I was younger I lived in a small town and endured so much shit for listening to punk and being different than the status quo...there were times when I was in high school that i got serious death threats based on my beliefs and not being affraid to vocalize them...The fact that someone could just run down a kid because he was a punk, and get away with it gives me absolutly no faith in this system...we'll throw people in jail for years for little shit like marijuana (which i don't do or even like) but will let murder's walk away...
It's said that at the trial they turned everything around on the punk kids...they were asking for it based on the way they were dressed...Camp's mother has even gone so far as to say that her son is a hero, and bragged about how much courage it took for her son to do this...WHAT??? IT TAKES COURAGE TO RUN SOMEONE OVER!!! FOR SOME REASON I DON'T THINK SO...she also went as far as to say that ALL punks are satanists, don't bathe, and are scum...now I don't know about any of you...but I bathe regularly, I do not worship satan and I am not scum b/c I may look different...
So please show your support, there will be a Unity Festival this summer in Amarillo in support and memory of Brian Deneke...and visit BrianDeneke.Org to find out more information....Thank You...
TIME FOR RANT #2
So I haven't really updated this thing in awhile...but something lately has been really getting to me about the "punk" scene today...especially where I'm currently living (outside Tulsa, OK)...So this is the thing that I have been noticing lately that has really gotten to me...
Here's the thing...it seems that anymore today the so called "punks" are just as conformitive as the sporto's or preppy kids if that's what you want to call them...I've been noticing this little trend in all of it for the past few years and just hearing little comments here and there has completely confirmed it...Punk has become no longer about being yourself and trying to make a difference in this world for the better...it's become a more or less fashion club...
This is what I mean by this exactly...around here...the most of the "punks" come from not necessarilly affluent families...but upper working class for the most part...most of them that I have come in contact really don't know what it's like to really have to worry about shit because there's mommy and daddy to take care of anything...Now don't get me wrong...it's fucking cool to have parents who love and accept you for who and what you are...to encourage you and help you reach your full potential...what I'm talking about are these kids out here who are always sitting around talking shit, acting like they have nothing when in fact they don't have a care in the world...I'm talking about the people who think what Punk Rock is, is being dirty and getting fucked up...
I'm talking about the kids who go around like they are SO fucking hardcore...The kids who think they are punker than thou...The kids who give everyone else shit for not being like them...
I know that this may sound bad of me...but I have run across some of the most judgemental punk rock kids in the last few years that it makes me want to fucking puke...it's sad that this little subculture is supposed to be about doing your own thing and being yourself...even if you dress in expensive clothes...it's what's in your heart...not the shirt you haven't washed in 6 months...Personally, I don't necessarilly dress "PUNK ROCK"...mainly because I know that sometimes I know that I need to look halfway normal for things like work...so I can support myself and help my family...
I guess what brings all this on...is that lately I've been around alot of fucking people who think that it's so fucking punk and so fucking cool to basically use everyone else because it's not punk rock to work for your shit and treat other people with some form of respect...Before I lived in Tulsa...I lived in a town with a pretty good punk scene...sure there were the fashion victims but for the most part they were in the minority...they were hateful and rude and most people just ignored them...Most of my friends were older...Not all looked PUNK...but some were what most people tend to think a punk to look like...Tattoo's, piercings, big mohawks and shit...but still if you think they fucking expected everyone else to take care of them...not even...I have one friend...he has a fucking degree...but he's now sick of computers so he doesn't use it...
never the less he will do whatever he has to to take care of himself and his family...he donates plasma and works his ass off for his shit...
Most people don't sit around and talk shit about people because of their lack of Punk rock dress, age, or whatever...around here I've come across so much shit like that it's fucking sick...For Example...I used to be on this little computer club for punks from Tulsa...mainly it was for discussion and show updates...someone put up a post about a 311 show...if you don't like them...so what...if you did...you knew about the show...no fucking big deal...but people got so offended b/c 311 isn't a "punk" band...one even went so far as to call the person who posted the message a nazi bitch and to bitch him out for posting it...CORRECT ME IF I'M WRONG BUT I DIDN'T KNOW THAT IF YOU WERE "PUNK" THE ONLY THING YOU ARE ALLOWED TO LIKE IS "PUNK"...I DIDN'T KNOW THAT YOU HAVE TO STEREOTYPE YOURSELF SO MUCH...I THOUGHT IT WAS ABOUT GOING AGAINST STEREOTYPES...
well you all can take this for whatever...i think i'm getting a little redundant and all...but you can e-mail me and tell me i'm full of shit if you want...or tell me your own personal feelings about what I am saying...
TIME FOR RANT #3
Okay I went to a show the other night and something happened that I feel like sharing with you guys...first off I have to say that the first two bands were great and I was having fun up until the point when two blatent boneheads walked in...one was in a shirt that read "WHITE PRIDE WORLD WIDE" w/ nazi insignia...and the other was in a "SKREWDRIVER" shirt...now first off I know that skrewdriver didn't start out a nazi shithead band...but they did become one...and to me people can preach about how thier first album is good and shit...but in my opinion why the hell would you wanna own any of their shit...i've also heard from countless people that their music is good (which i've heard it and it's not that great) and if the music is good they can listen and ignore thier lyrics...about that...why would you wanna spend your money to support that kind of bullshit?
Alright so these guys are standing behind me at the bar, and they are chatting it up to the singer of this supposid Anti-Nazi band, and the singer is all laughin and jokin with them...so I turn to my boi and tell him about the shit...and then I decided to perform a little experiment...see there is this guy I know...and right before we got married he decided he was a skinhead...I've got no problem with true skins and shit...some of my best friends have been...but this guy's heart wasn't pure...I know this number one because one night he was giving my boi a tat and he made the statement "I swear you'd think my parents are jews the way they are so damn cheep.." hmmm does this statement sound kinda anti-semetic...but anyway he claims to be all anti-bonehead and anti-racist and shit...so I told him about the boneheads to see what he'd do...
So he goes over to the bar and starts talking to these guys...about 5 min. later I notice him shakin hands and laughing...he later came to me and said..."oh those guys are cool, they aren't nazi's they just listen to nazi music"...First off this statement slayed me...You aren't a nazi but you'll listen to thier music, and you'll wear their logo's and White pride shit...hmmm usually that makes a nazi...or a Fencewalker which to me is even worse b/c they will kiss ass on both sides to either avoid confrintation or because they are so dumb they don't care who their friends are...
So this pisses me off...and later I went to the bathroom b/c my beer is kicking in...and I notice these assholes sieg heiling each other...hmm...not a nazi i thought...so I go get this guy I know and told him we needed to have a little talk (b/c supposidly he was andy's best friend...but he was talking shit about us all over the place...and talkin shit about me b/c I told him he'd become a fashion victim and I was sick of listening to what kind of clothes he HAD TO HAVE to be a skinhead)so he comes outside and I just said "so why do you think it's your job to defend nazi's?" and he started going on and on about how they weren't nazi's and we were just like "yeah right you keep telling yourself that..." anyway I reminded him about the little statement he made about his parents...I told him you know you can say what you want about being against it but you start hugging on nazi's and shakin thier hands and you got nazi all over you...
For me racism is probably one thing that can't be tolerated...It's bullshit no matter which way you slice it...I don't like it or put up with it from either side...the idea that one race of people are superior b/c of skin color is the most assinine thing in the world...I've listened to white supremisits talk...i've listened to black supremisists talk and none of it makes a lick of sense...and in my opionion if you keep your mouth shut and if you let one thing slip you let them win...and is that worth it?
So this my friends isn't all that happened concerning these fine gentlemen this evening...I was at this point beginning not to believe my boi and all he was saying about this band N.O.T.A. being so Anti-Nazi... from what I was seeing...I was having a little fun w/ this guy I've known for awhile and haven't seen in like a year...and talking to this guy I'd just met that was really cool...It was almost time for the band to go on and we went back inside...So about 10 of these 'skins' and now I use the term loosely...gather in front...the average size 6'6" and 250 lbs at least...me, andy, and my friend John are all standing around...on the fringes of were the pit will be...and let me remind you...I'm small but I can hold my own...I've been going to shows for like 10 years and I've been in pit's around pits...and I don't take shit...so the band starts up...within the first two songs these 'skins' had started shit with this guy I'd met Matt...they beat the hell out of him for just being in there...and me...well they'd come over and pushed me down 3 times...one of which pushing me into a table and causing me to hit my head pretty bad...and I was listening to some of the lyrics...the first song they were chanting "this country is no longer free" and the second one something to the effect of "bash their heads in w/ a baseball bat", and we'd seen the handle of a switchblade...I took off...I was thinking to myself this music is too violent and I don't wanna be a part of it...
So on my way out I passed my good friend Beth and we went outside...we'd been out like 2 minutes maybe when some small punk kid comes flying out the door and lands at my feet...about 5 min. after that Matt, this guy I kinda know Scott and about 5 others come flying out...soon after that me boi comes out looking for me and he was telling me they were jumping on everyone... the guy that owned the club came outside...by this time there were like 6 people that had been jumped by 3 to 4 of these guys...and were bleading everywhere and really fucked up...he asked the kids "what do you want me to do about it?" everyone was like "Kick them Out!" and he refused saying he couldn't because they paid...so while we're still all out there...and i will remind you we'd been out by this time maybe 5 whole minutes...we hear over the speaker something about a stabbing...so we went back in...to find out what in the fuck was going on...we went back over to where we were...the band offered to play naked if they'd quit fighting (what the fuck that was I don't know) and they started playing again...within a minute one was holding this kid that was like 14 down and two were beating on them...me boi jumped down there to try to get them off...all he did was grab one of the guys arms because the kid was a wreck by this time...then before I know it...they swing at him...he dodged it so one of the others grabs his arms and pins them behind his back...I was on a chair they punch him a couple of times...and the next thing I knew is I'd been thrown 4 to 5 feet into a concrete wall...Andy was on top of me...he started to get back up and I pulled him back... simply for the fact I knew their were knives and shit...and I didn't wanna be a widow at 21 a month away from our 1 year anniversary...the crowd was clearing and I was getting between them and they stopped...I think they may have had a clue that if they'd swung at me in the open they would have been fucked...
So the whole thing's over right...the band finally quit playing...but as I'm talkin to the chic at the door the WP guys were behind me talking about if they saw him outside they were gonna jump him and kill him...because he was trying to help a kid out...So it ended up in andy calling the cops...the owner of the club getting pissed at him for it...and like 15 punk kids walking us to our car...b/c andy's life had been threatned...and ruining our plans of going to see the Buisness, because it's gonna be more of the same shit and even worse there...
I think what pissed me off the most was this...first off these were the guys that my husband's ex-best friend (as of now) said were "cool guys"...the band wouldn't do shit...it took like 7 or 8 people getting the fuck pounded out of them for them to finally stop...the club owners who were to much of cowards to kick these guys out...and even if these guys weren't actually racist nazis...maybe not all of them were...but they are nazi's...one of their justifications were that punks were dirty red's...hmmmmmmmm...what does that say...and I think what really got to me was that most of these skins weren't even from Tulsa...they were from OKC and TX and decided that they owned our scene...what the hell is that all about?
Well I think that I will end this now...because I can keep rambling for hours about it...so lemme know what you think...I'm gonna be setting up a page for everyone's comments and their own rants on things...so e-mail me with it...bye bye now...
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