My Friends

Most people, myself included.. use music as their inspiration to write. If I'm listening to a certain song, somtimes I'll just start writing a story based on what the songs about, or write somthing that has to do with somthing that the song reminds me of. So here I am, listening to "You're A God", and thinking of somthing I read in a magazine today, so I thought I'd get all sappy-ish about it, and write stuff. Here goes...

Some people spend there whole lives trying to fit in, and trying to be accepted, and others are automatically there. What people don't realize is that "fitting in" or, "being accepted" can mean so many different things, but for most people, during high school, it means being popular. What even more people don't realize, is that "popular" has its meanings too. You could be considered the nerdiest kid in school, by the jocks, the preps, and the goths... but you might have a zillion other "nerd" friends. You've got a ton of friends, so isn't that considered popular too? Well it should be. I don't have a ton of friends, but I have enough. Not too little, not too many. Its sad that in todays world, and yesterdays world too, I'm sure, consider "popular" as the "cool group". I'm not trying to judge those people as individuals, but as a whole, they make themselves look rich, they try to make smoking look cool, and they put down people who they think aren't "cool", but they have lots of friends just like them, and they usually overpower, or at least act like they overpower the rest of the school, although I guess it depends what school we're talking about here also. But that, my friend.. is what they all consider as "popular".. or "cool".

I got trapped into a situation like that once. In elementry school, grades 6 and 7, and all of 4 or 5 weeks of grade 8... I hung out with the "popular" kids. At the beggining of grade 8, I realized something... I didn't know who I was. I wasn't myself, I couldn't be myself in front of these people. I didn't know them, they didn't know me.. and a lot of them, didn't know eachother. For the majority of them, fitting in, and looking cool as a group was all they cared about. They'd all make sure they baught the same brands, and listened to the same music. There was so many of them, acting as if they were so "close", and so many secrets and lies and rumours that go on in that group, there was a constant fight, and there was always angst between at least half of them, over stupid things... like, someone steeling the others boyfriend/girlfriend, blah blah. I was sitting there like.. what on earth am I doing? I didn't belong there at all, I wanted to be myself, someone who I hadn't been able to be for 2 years, I just wanted to be myself again, and be comfortable with who I was without someone down my throat just because what I was wearing wasn't "cool" enough. So, after not much debate.. I left. Just like that. One day, I just.. stopped hanging out with them, and went off with another girl I knew, and her friends. Did any of my old supposed "friends" notice? No. For the next year, it was as if I wasn't alive to them, they didn't care. They weren't friends at all. After only a week hanging out with these new friends, I knew what I wanted, and what I didn't want. I wanted to be their friend, and I didn't want to be stuck in the same group of people I was with before. I was totally myself.. I wasn't affraid of saying somthing stupid, I could wear what I pleased, and I could act wild, and be myself.. and be happy. The next year, I met new friends again. Well I guess you could say "re-met". A group of people I had known since.. 4th grade maybe, somewhere around there, people I had never really gotten the chance to know in Elementry. I'm the happiest I've ever been. I don't know what I would do without these people, we're all behind eachother 100%, no matter what happens.. and just knowing that makes me feel fine, and I'm not worried at all. I have a great best friend, and other great close friends.. along with a bunch of aquaintinces, and I wouldn't trade a single one of them in for the world. Because of them, I'm not affraid anymore.

"Maybe this group was only the second level of popularity. They dressed weirder. The guys they hung out with were skinny or chubby, even dorky- but so adorable and so sweet. They would do anything for you as a friend. We had so many different types among us. But what we all had in common was that we loved eachother. And to this very day, we still do."- Jessica Riddle

Enough said.