The World of Mayonnaise 2003, all you need to know about mayonnaise in the year 2003. We will guide you, advise you, enlighten you and frighten you, and possibly serve you with a nice side salad with suitable dressing along the way. Tread carefully, leave only footprints and don't feed the animals.

Would buy you a pint with their very last £5 note

Would sell you their grandmother for the price of a bottle of meths