Riverside Park
"Ev-er-y fucking time!"
"That's one crazy ride."
"Chia-chest."
"Bring a scumbag and get in 1/2 price."
"Ya know, I hate it when parents can't control their kids."
"Hey, did you hear what that guy just said?" - "WHAT?!?!?!"
"Dare you to bite one off.."
"Where's that kid's legs...oh, he must be cam-o-flagued."
Here is my page tribute to Riverside, an amusement park in Massachusetts, and the trip we took there on July 31st 1999. It was a great day in the history of man, from Pat Schraa losing his keys on the Skycoaster, to Jack Gardy 'flying solo' on all the rides. It all started for 8 kids with a quiet bus trip from Westerlo, NY. Those kids were Dave Stalker, Samantha Skinner, Andy Veltman, Jeff Petrosillo, Larry Ragone, Andrea Brush, Pat Schraa and Jack Gardy. At 10 o'clock, we arrived and waited in the hot-ass parking lot for a while. After entering we walked around and found our first ride, some shipwreck boat waterride thingy. A short wait in line past and we got in the ride, until a weird psychotic looking person told us it was broken and needed to be fixed. 10 minutes passed as we were entertained by such songs as "Tequila" and "You Can Call Me Al". Once repaired, we rode and got wet and left. Our next ride was the Blizzard River, where Jack ended up "talking slick". After a cold drenching we proceeded to the Skycoaster. 2 times around we went and had a ball we did. The Twister was our next stop, as Pat, Larry, and Andrea watched, we proceeded to spin and flip vertically. Next, it was off to the water park. The water tasted of salt, most likely due to sweat and urine, but we went on on our quest down the slides, under the sprinklers, around the lazy river, and the great wave pool. A quick trip to our 3 lockers and then we were off to find some lunch, but now before a stop to our 4th locker. 20 minutes of pure food eating passed as we observed many things from a park bench, such as a man with dirty Budweiser shorts or a guy with a pink tanktop. Pat's flying trapeeze ride was our next hit, then the 45 minute wait for the Mind Eraser with our friend Chia-Chest. A quick lemon ice drink thing to refresh ourselves and then a quick trip on the Time Warp, where Jack noticed his friends again. It was again time for a Pat Schraa ride...the Kontiki. All went smoothly when I fought a little girl for a cart and lost it. Of course I sat there with her, then Jack was forced to sit out this time...again. After the Kontiki, it was time, for the big one, the Hellevator. 1 hour and 15 minutes passed waiting in a line, then finally we were there. Dave, Samantha and I sat on one side, while Jeff sat with two black guys he didn't know. As we ascended the two guys flipped everyone off, and on that great drop, they let pennies fall on everyone's heads. Jack, Larry and Andrea finished it off for our group and we took one last ride on the Teacups, spinning mad fast for the 4 people we had there. It may have been over to us, but in our hearts, Riverside lives on!
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