Failure of the American Dream
My parents immigrated here from Ireland, when I was young. They were in search of the 'American Dream'. My father worked in various labor jobs; logger, laborer, and in the construction industry. He and me mother saved every bit of money they earned. The money they saved later helped him buy out the company from a man he was working for, who was at that time on the verge of bankruptcy. After years of putting in many hours into this company, he eventually turned it around and made a decent life for the family. He always wanted to teach me that nothing came free in life and the only way to achieve anything was to work hard for it. Even though he was making a decent living, he wanted me to earn my own way in life. I started working when I was 14 years old. I worked after school everyday in a restaurant and in the summers I went to work for his construction company. When I turned 17, I left and went off to college. I worked full time during this time and held a full time university schedule. Since I had to work, I was unable to take part in internships that some others could afford to do. I ended up being the first person in my family to graduate from university and I did so with honors from a highly respected school.
I soon realized that the B.A. degree I received was not opening any doors for me and made the decision to attend graduate school. I enrolled in a Clinical Psychology Masters program, that at the time was a growing field and many jobs were available making a decent living. I continued working full time and took out student loans to pick up the expenses that I could not cover with my job. I was married at the time, so I had to support my household and pay for tuition. I made it through the program, got my Master's in Clinical Psychology and graduated with a 3.78 grade point average.
After graduation, my wife and I decided to move to Ohio to where here family lived. She wanted to have children (or so I thought at the time), thus she wanted to be closer to her mother. I got a job working for the Department of Human Service. It was a bachelor's level job and did not pay much, but it was somewhere to start. After being in Ohio for a little less than a year, my wife decided that she no longer wanted to be married any longer. She told me that she had thought we had married at too young of an age and she felt like she needed to be alone to find herself. Not so sure if that is the exact reason why she made this decision, nevertheless I was left heartbroken and in a State where the only people I knew were her family. I then moved back to New Jersey, where my family was living. I started working at a bar, as a bartender, until I could find a full time job in my field.
A couple months after I returned, my mother was diagnosed with cancer. She went through about a year of chemotherapy treatments and the doctors believed that she had beat it. I had taken a job outside my field during this time, as Director of Purchasing for a large holding company. I did not feel that it would be right for me to be working as a Psychologist, when I myself was going through a hard time in my life and the job paid the bills. I had supported myself from the time I was 17 and the student loans I had taken out for graduate school and all the other bills my wife and I acquired were fairly high. Four months after the doctor's had told my mother that she had beat the cancer, a friend had gone to her house to find her collapsed on the stairs. She was rushed to the emergency room and after many test, they found a inoperable malignant tumor in her brain. My parents were divorced by this time and she did not have anyone around to be able to take care of her. I needed to be there for her during this time and informed my bosses that I needed some time to be able to help her get to her treatments. My bosses seemed to be understanding of this at the time. The doctors were telling her that she had a chance at beating this, though they did not tell her that there had never been any case where a person survived from this type of brain tumor. She was still able to get around for the first couple months, but after that she was no longer able to move around and was admitted to the hospital. After about a bit over a month in the hospital and finally getting an honest diagnosis from a neurologist, she was released on hospice. We had arranged nurse aids to be with her during the day to help her out, though I need to be there when the aids were not there at night and during shift changes. I moved in with her to help her out and arranged it with my bosses to be able to have a bit of a flexible schedule, in case any emergencies arouse during the day. All of my work was being completed on time, so I did not think my job was in any type of jeopardy. About two months after I had moved in to help her, I had awoke one night to go check on her to find out that she had passed away. This is not any situation I would wish upon anyone's child and needless to say it left me in a bit of a depression. I had never missed a day of work and had not taken any vacation time, so I asked for some time off from work to deal with my situation. I returned to work and about two months later I was called into my bosses office. He told me that he did not think I should be working there any longer. He stated that my work there was exceptional and I had saved them a large amount of money during my time, though my being depressed was not good thing to see.
Since that time a lot of things had changed with managed care coming on to the scene and the economy was not in that great of a position. Most Master's level psychologist jobs now needed an L.P.C., something that did not even exist during my graduate school training. It requires that you must have the graduate school courses along with around 4000 hours of post-graduate clinical experience. I had not worked in the field since I left Ohio and the license did not even exist at that time, thus I did not get any credit for those hours. Now I can not be hired for the majority of jobs in my field, since I do not have this license. If I can not get a job in the field, how is one suppose to get the hours needed? There are some jobs out there, for non profit organizations that do not require a clinician to have a L.P.C., though I have yet to find one to hire me. I have now been out of work going on three years now and have sent out thousands of resumes. I have even tried to get a job doing the accounting work that I did to pay my way through university, though now it seems all the employers want the person to have an accounting degree. I know the job and had performed it for almost 8 years, though without the degree I can not find a job in the area. I have applied for jobs below my educational level, though I am not even offered these jobs. I get the impression that they think I am going to leave the job, since I have a higher level of education than is required.
I pick up money by bartending here and there, though it does not pay my bills. I go sometimes without eating for a couple days and wondering if I am going to end up out on the street. I thought I did everything right, I worked hard all my life. I attended two top schools in the country, graduating with honors. I really do not know what to do anymore, thus this web page. The time of the 'American Dream' seems to be gone. No longer does hard work and educating oneself get you (or at least me) anywhere. I am not looking to be rich, I am just looking to be able to work everyday and not worry about not having a roof over my head or food in my mouth. The President's speeches about how the level of education one has is linked to the success in life one will achieve at this time appears to be a tall tale. Long gone are the days of Frank MacCourt and my father working there way up in the world through hard work it seems. Three years of being out of work is three years too long. I hope that I have earned something in life, though at this time it all seems to have been for nothing. I am willing to move to any state, Ireland, or even the U.K., I have even applied for jobs out of the country and out of the state...though still no luck.
So if anyone knows any way to help me or is an employer in my field or in the business fields I have experience in, please contact me methos2@optonline.net Any help or guidance would be very appreciated.
September 25, 2003