. I was appalled to see Maureen's account that
sisters were actually thrown out into the street en masse, and it
infuriated me to think that a blind sister was among that number.  Today
I spent an entire day at a deaf/blind social and all the more I know that
some of the anger that Chris Hirtler is expressing should have been
expressed back in "the old days" of COBU.  Where were the brothers with
anger then?  If a sister is attacked, does the escort brother have to
even consider if he should lay down his life or not? If he feels mad at
the attacker as he punches him defending the sister, does that make the
brother a terrible sinner?   I'm not saying anyone should retain
bitterness, and although learning of this past injustice angers me, I
don't intend to make it the focus of my life or anything.  But I think
righteous anger is different than just holding some grudge against ST.

Sure, David did not touch God's anointed, but who still thinks ST in his
wickedness is anointed by God?  Was he ever?  When we started living
communally it was mostly out of necessity.  Often we would move into a
fellowship only to find that the electric company was about to shut us
off or that long-distance calls to our lambs cost more than the phone
company was willing to stretch on over a few months.  So, since we lived
in the same house and some were going hungry, we pooled the resources.
It was only after that when ST started to rise to controlling power.
Although many thought the colored bible thing was cool, it was his
aggressive, assertive "I'll teach you idiots" style that pushed everyone
into thinking he could lead, NOT God's anointing.  It is just his own
boasting however much he claims himself to be "Elijah" or "an old
testament character" or that poor Gayle is held up (see Grace Mtg.
transcript) as being so other worldly that "she's not even human," by
virtue of  their "divine" marriage.

What is not even human is how those sisters were treated!!!  What kind of
slave labor is going on there now?  Do those brethren in the salvage
business get any kind of training in the safe removal of asbestos, say,
or will they die of cancer because no one cared enough to inform them,
due to personal greed for gain?  ST is still at it!  He is still hurting
people.  Even if we all are so "nice" to forgive him for anything we got
hurt with personally, it still angers me that ST is getting away with it
NOW!!!

I personally plan to testify against him at the Judgment Seat of Christ,
because I honestly don't think his lack of repentance is going to save
him from the fire.  Does this mean I will thank about this every moment
until then? No.  Do some of you think this qualifies me for some judgment
myself? Possibly. (It certainly isn't "nice"). Do some of you think this
anger will eat me up like cancer? Possibly you do.  But I am not going to
dwell on it more than it deserves, because I do think the time is coming
(Maranatha, Lord Jesus!) soon and very soon that ST will have to face
God.  It is my prayer, whatever you may think of me, that the Lord
hastens that day by taking ST out of this life and minimizing any more
damage.

Does that mean like the anti-abortionists that I personally want to take
action against him? No.  But my expectations of any of us "reconciling"
with him are zip, zero, nil.  It would be justice to see an eye for an
eye, (how would he like being blind and thrown into the street?), but it
will probably not happen in this lifetime.  But I will rejoice when it
does.  Why? Because then we will see with spiritual eyes, not human
frailty, emotionalism and a head full of how we "should" perceive stuff.
I am glad to have a promised time when all things will be made completely
right.  That helps me not dwell on all the garbage here that is illogical
or unfair.  I trust God has a plan in it, so I don't need to be bitter.
I can move on to Peggy B.'s "point <c>" as indeed, I am.

When were You poor, blind and naked, Lord?  When were You downtrodden and
discouraged and of bad reputation?  When were You in need or lonely,
Lord?  Oh, You were one of the brethren in COBU?  It was You I saw in
that sister as she cried? That brother, as he stammered to defend
himself... that was You?

We were all so brow-beaten into "pleasing Jesus," can we say that ST does
by his actions?  Is Jesus pleased in COBU?  Is anyone besides ST (even
Gayle, because I see her as human, even on that pedestal) pleased there?
(I have seen her cry).

Twisting, twisting, twisting. That's what ST's art is.  Twisting.  Didn't
you learn it too?  Pick a subject.  Couldn't you defend both sides?  And
"projection" -- wasn't he good at accusing the brethren of the very
things he found wrong in himself? That he even did? Oh, he was "the most
humble one" there he stated.  It was always those evil older brothers,
never him, no, never his fault, except that he did operate in error, only
about a little thing, though, Grace, but hey, the brothers were to blame
for that error too, for not telling him so...

Dan Hunt is right that we can't fall back into treating one another like
in the group.  I'm for Chris Hirtler. I think he has a right to express
himself as vehemently as he wants to (without resorting to fists!)  I
have no fear that it will eat him alive, because God is dealing with
Chris and has him in His everlasting arms.  I think the raw honesty of it
has touched a nerve with many of us.  I think some of us are afraid of
our anger.  Depression is anger turned inward.  Some, when they left,
went through this, (especially as they didn't have opportunity to act on
their righteous feelings there).

We are all "in the Hospital" from our experience in COBU.  We are at
various stages of recovery from various degrees of wounding.  What our
own therapy with God has been might not be just the prescription for
someone else.  Only the Great Physician knows what healing is yet to
come. But healing is coming, Praise the Real Jesus!  Don't give me your
medication, my salve is not the same as yours, and that's okay.

We can agree to disagree in love.  We each have our relationship with
Jesus, Who loves us.  Yes, I do think he even loves ST.  But I don't
think He is at all pleased with him, so if we are to be "like Him" some
of that righteous anger is going to come up.  Anger is not the same as
sin. Defending the innocent/weak is righteous.  I am for venting.
(Catharsis, purging).  Be there to listen brethren.  Listening is an act
of love.  I don't know about you, but I am glad for anyone who gets riled
at injustice on my behalf.  I think in his own way, that is part of what
is going on with Chris.  He wishes he could make it right.  I respect
that.  And Maureen, I do very much respect your moving past all that
hurt. I am sorry you had to endure any such treatment, and thank you for
your honesty. God bless you, sincerely, those of you who long for
justice.