Every streetcorner resounded with cheering and mirth

No apocalypse had come to tear the planet asunder

I was alone in a croud with nothing to plunder

No looting, no rioting, no violence or arson

None of the things that make Y2K fun

"Happy new years" I cried but behind my human smile

A plot was slowly emerging in my mind all the while

I plotted to fulfill a dastardly need

Old aquaintance would be forgot this year indeed!

So as I, plotting armageddon, strode off out of sight

I thought "Happy New Years to All, and to All a Good Night!"

I can't quite remember what my plan was or why we're all still here. All I remember is waking up naked in an unfamiliar city with unexplained major chest wounds. But I guess that's what New Year's is all about.