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Crafty Wench

"Stroke the ego. Love the ego. No, no, no... Don't BITE the ego". (And the people who haven't seen The Spy Who Shagged Me are looking around saying "What?")

Hi there. My Name is Lyz... That's LIZ with a Y ( just because I gotta be different than everyone else). I realize that the entire universe does not revolve around me, but wouldn't it be kinda nice if it did? You know "EVYL LYZ, SUPREME BEING" has a REALLY nice ring to it ::Grynning Evylly:: Welcome to the section of my page where I'm supposed to put myself up on a pedestal for all the world to see. Soooo, this is my opportunity to brag a little, right?



So, who is this "Wench" who calls herself "Crafty", anyway?

I'm a graduate of Edison Community College in Florida, Also a graduate of Kilgore College in Texas, and am now working toward a degree in Computer Science at the University of Texas. I'm currently majoring in Computer science, but that could change any minute. I am actually developing a penchant for History, so who knows what the future holds. I have my hands a bit full this semester with 12 credit hours, but somehow I've still found time to maintain a webpage... Goddess save us all.

You might come to the conclusion that I'm some type of femminazi from some of the statements I make.( If you want an example, look at the last line of text in the last paragraph. ) of course if you've looked at the Soapbox page, you'll realize that you're half-right. I don't want all the men on the planet to shrivel up and die (Though it might be fun to watch), I just want them to have to walk around in six-inch stilleto heels and pantyhose delivering coffee and performing other... ( um, what's a good rated 'G' word here? )... services 24 hours a day to all the women in their lives . I think that is punishment enough for being born male..... heehee. Aren't you glad men aren't pets? you'd have to walk them and wash them and clothe them and feed them.... Oh, wait. We do that anyway, don't we?

You may wonder why I, a feminist, chose a very-not-politically-correct word to be a part of the title to my Site. I chose it, because I feel that the word "Wench" is not used enough. I happen to really like the word "Wench". It feels good rolling off your tongue. Say it with me "Wench", "Wench". Outside of the S.C.A. (Society for Creative Anachronism), it is hardly used at all. I think we, as women, should take this word and make it have positive connotations, just as we have done with another offensive term. (If you're having trouble thinking of it, I'll give you a hint. It starts with a 'B'.) I am PROUD to call myself a "Wench"!

Wanna see my pedigree? I'm descended from the New England Lords. That's "Lord" as in a last name, not as in a title granted by a monarch. However, if you want to call me "Lord Lyz" I would not be offended. My family calls me "Bess". I'm going to rant on this a bit, just to warn you. I was teased incessantly about this as a child. Sometimes I STILL get flack about it. "Bess" is a name for a cow or a servant or Nancy Drew's slightly chubby- yet very attractive in her own way-, blonde sidekick. Now, don't get me wrong. I LOVE my name. It's so singular. I've only met one other "Bess" in my life. (and she was ninety) If I could introduce myself to someone as "Bess" and not have the person to whom I was speaking pull an instant picture of a spotted heifer to the forefront of their mind, I would. I recognize that glazed look that practically spells a big red "COW" on people's foreheads. I hate that look. So it's Lyz, got it?

I'm a real Florida gal. I miss the beach and the sea air and the weather that's not 108 degrees in the Summer and freezing cold in the Winter. I'm attending school here in Texas, and then I'm outta here, Buddy. Back to the home where Canadians roam and the tourists and hammerheads play. Where seldom is heard a mispronounced word, and the breeze makes sand fly in your face. I'm writing a new song to the tune of "Home on the range" there. If you have any new or just plain funny verses that you'd like to share, mail me and I'll post 'em somewhere

Well, I'd love to stay and chat, but this Bio got outta hand. It's longer than I expected. Oh, well. I guess I just like to talk and talk and talk. I'm sure you'd like to get on with the rest of your lives. Have fun and stay safe.


©Lyz Pollock 2000, All rights reserved.