James. 'Nuff Said.
First, the facts:
Japanese Name: Kojiro
Age: 17 (Yes, I know some of you morons out there are gonna say I'm wrong, but do you really wanna fight ME about it?)
Goals: Become filthy rich and obscenely famous. Without having to marry anyone.
Hair: Blue (Once again, you really wanna argue with me?)
Eyes: Green
Partners in Crime: Moi, and Meowth
Pokemon: Growlie, Weepinbell/Victreebel, Koffing/Weezing, Magikarp (Bleh)
James tries very hard to be a bad guy. He's really, really melodramatic. Sometimes he embarrasses me, the dork. He's sure he's good-looking, although he couldn't be as good-looking as me, of course. I guess he's really pretty sensitive and sweet. (This is code for wimp.) He can be an airhead sometimes. (Okay, so he's an airhead most of the time.) He is NOT too good at the evil villain thing. I've GOT to train that boy. He's incredibly dramatic with that rose of his--he says it's "the flower of romance and passion". Whatever. He must be growing them in the balloon or something, because every time I look, he's got a new one. He's got this deep, rich, velvety voice that sort of melts you... (oops. I did NOT say that.) He needs a directional smack every few seconds, unfortunately. I'm afraid I may be bruising his precious little ego, but who cares. He never hits me back; I don't think it's ever occured to him to willingly mar my perfection. He HAS dared to yell at me. I, of course, convinced him of the error of his ways. He doesn't mind whacking Meowth occaisionally, but then, I would consider him seriously disturbed if he did. He is terrible at taking his job seriously. Rrrr... how many times do I have to tell him, THIS end of the bazooka points that way! He's generally a very obedient... I mean, cooperative guy. This means he does whatever I tell him to do. He's not as stupid as he acts. When he was small, he lived with his rich loser snob family, and they wanted him to marry this absolutely abominable girl named Jessebell. GRRRR... they had the nerve to suggest that I looked just like her! Anyways, my poor James ran away from his stifling home life to enroll in Pokemon Tech, and then he did the smart thing and dropped out with me to join a bicycle gang. Now THEY appreciate us. He was known as Little Jim, or Trainer Jim, because the fool was too much of a wuss to ride without his training wheels. Sigh... oh, well. He was still their most respected member. Besides me, of course. Anyways, then we joined the glorious Team Rocket, and that's how we got to be here now.
Bottom line, he's just an idiotic softie who tries hard. But we love him anyway. (Ack! Umm... plationically! Platonically! Yes! That's it!)
