18 weeks gestation
My name is Derya and I gave birth to my first baby girl “Yasmin” on 30th August 2002.
I was 6 weeks pregnant when I started bleeding. I was always ill and I knew something was wrong… Repeated ultrasounds and blood tests over several weeks still showed no abnormality. It was until I was 16 weeks pregnant that I started to bleed very heavily and was admitted to hospital. Still they couldn’t find anything. I was discharged and went home. I was admitted to hospital again 2 days later as my bleeding got heavier and heavier when the doctors realized that there was no fluid left around the baby.. My water had broken but the baby was still alive. The doctors discussed my options…. The baby would not survive, it would have been severely brain damaged and have un-developed lungs therefore would have died as soon as she was born.
At 18 weeks we decided to terminate as I couldn’t go ahead with the pregnancy knowing that my baby was not going to make it… I was, and still emotionally distressed and trying to cope with my loss as much as I can..
Last week I had my follow-up with my obstetrician which revealed that I had an infection. It made me feel less guilty knowing that I made the right decision for us as things could have been worse for the baby’s and my health.
At the moment I am very scared and afraid to have children as this was my first pregnancy.. On the other hand my husband would love to have another but I don’t think I am physically or mentally ready for another pregnancy.
May God bless and best wishes,
click on the fairy to email Derya personally
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