She Said
by: Cinderella
Copyright '02

 
Had I known you were in there when I walked in, my heart would have stopped. I would have reacted my usual way. I would have panicked, I would have gone blank, I would have thought that there would be no way I could get your attention; hence there would be no point in trying to impress you or even at least make you glance at me.
 
So I guess it was for the better that I didn’t know.
 
We sat at the bar’s stools as all the tables and couches were taken. I didn’t even bother scanning the place for a pretty face like I usually do. I was more concerned about my Martini and how dry the bartender would make it. He gave me the weirdest look when I requested 7 olives. Can’t a girl have her 7 olives? What’s so weird about that? I will pay for your freaking olives..
 
So when later I heard a voice saying, “what’s with all those olives?» I decided to ignore it. But the shocked expression on my friend’s face made me turn around. And almost choke on my second olive…
 
Was I dreaming? Had my pathetic mind replaced a strangers face with yours? Coz in that case, the stranger had the exact same trucker’s hat with you.
 
And yes, I almost had a heart attack there, 40 years before my time. I must have a back up mind or something because something gave my mouth the order to answer your question with the lamest answer ever. "I like to put them in my mouth and suck the life out of them".
 
I realized how vulgar I had just sounded by the laugh my friend tried to stifle. I think I blushed. I swallowed hard and opened my mouth again, to explain. Explain what? I stopped, bringing my fingers to my mouth, as if to emphasize that I had sounded stupid enough and I had to stop.
 
Your smile made me melt. The famous Chasez grin, all mine. All for me.
 
“I know what you meant”, you said. Actually, you didn’t, coz I in the end, it was an innuendo. I wished those olives were your dick.
 
After an awkward silence that let me realize how blue your eyes really are, you spoke.
 
“I m Josh”, you said. “You?”
 
I wanted to laugh. My name was written almost all over me. Big silver letters. Angela.
 
 “Angela“, I replied.
 
Then I saw your glance falling on my tube top.
 
“I should have guessed”, you said. And smiled. Damn you.
 
My knees were feeling so weak, I thought that if I stood up, I would collapse. It doesn’t matter how many times I had read or heard how incredibly hot you are in person. Nothing compares to what was standing there in front of me. And you were standing there, in front of me. In front of me.
 
My friend leaned closer to me and whispered a ‘see you later’. I couldn’t thank her enough for being so fuckin smart. But I was actually panicking with the thought of being there with you all-alone. I took a deep breath and exhaled and waved bye. She was actually waving bye at you. I felt like such a bitch. I didn’t even introduce you…
 
“Are you here with someone?» you asked.
 
I wanted to scream. You were asking me if I was there alone. My centre was on fire. My body had the reaction I always expected it would have in your sight. I just wasn’t aware of the degree…
 
“Oh no!» I said, almost yelling. I was there alone, all yours. “No!”
 
You moved and sat beside me, on the stool my friend had left. All I could do was stare into those eyes. My God, those eyes. Magnets, I m telling you…
 
“I can leave you alone if you want”, you said and panic overwhelmed by body. I think I almost jumped up.
 
“NO!» I pleaded in a voice barely audible. My God, did I sound pathetic. And there was that look of recognition. You knew I knew. I silently prayed you d stay.
 
God must have heard my prayers coz you did. You tried to make conversation, asking me where I m from and stuff like that. All I could do was reply mechanically and smile and wonder why on earth you were showing interest in me. Could you sense that?
 
Could you sense how much I wanted you? Did you understand that I intentionally was brushing my hand against you “accidentally” or whisper seductively in your ear? I had done that with no other man. I would never. I don’t know why I did that with you…
 
And then, all of a sudden, you grabbed my hand and took me out of the club.. I don’t know what had suddenly gotten into you. I was really surprised. Good surprised.
 
“I didn’t like it in there”, you said simply.
 
I wanted to laugh. Was it that normal to just grab me and drag me out? Hell, I loved you for it.
 
“Where do you want to go?” I asked. The breeze outside was cold. When my fingers tried to button my cardigan, they met yours that came for help. The distance between our bodies was now very small, small enough for me to lose my senses in your smell. I actually touched your hands to stabilize myself. Not very smart, as your hot skin sent shivers down my spine, creeping up and down like spiders. Not from the cold, this time. I looked into your ocean blue eyes. I don’t know what I was trying to see.
I m lying.
I was hoping I would see something that would betray that you really liked me…
 
"How about there?" you asked, nodding towards Starbucks.
 
"Starbucks...» I said, trying to stifle a laugh. "Sure!» I found it funny, that your highness would want to go to a coffee place. I had no problem though. Anywhere with you. Anywhere.
 
So far I thought I was in love with you. It wasn’t till those two hours in there that I truly fell for you. For dorky JC playing hangman with me, on a freaking napkin. Artistic JC, arguing with me about photographers. Music lover JC, fighting over the best Sting song… Real JC, looking at me with those amazing blue eyes that can kill you. They can really kill you.
 
There were so many questions I wanted to ask you. But that moment, my dream was coming true. Me and you, there, sitting, talking. Me, listening to your thoughts. Heaven. Paradise. Dream come true. If you only knew…
 
God knows how wet you had made me. I could smell me. The way you played with your tongue, one million times more provoking and distracting than on tv… your clothes and the way they fell on you… your scent… your lips and the way you licked and bit them every now and then.. Were you doing it on purpose? Asshole.
 
I had a battle inside me… Should I show you right away that I wanted you like crazy? Should I pretend miss innocence? Would you buy it? Should I be myself and not let you touch me like I wouldn’t let anyone else the first time I met him? What if I missed my one and only chance to make my other dream come true? To be on the same bed with you and please you? Really please you? I had no idea what to do. But I wouldn’t invade your space. I just wouldn’t. I have some respect for myself. I wouldn’t just… I don’t know, grab your crotch, to let you know that this is what I want.
 
And then you confessed one of your insecurities. The reason I was with you. That you re JC of Nsync.
 
"I know what they decided that you are", I told you. "Show me what you really are".
 
I wasn’t lying. All I knew about you was what I was reading and seeing. Who said that was the real you? I was in love with that guy, but was it the real you? I would so die to find out.
I don’t know if my answer surprised you in some way but you wouldn’t stop staring at me. I felt awkward so I looked away. And then you placed your fingertips on my chin and brought my face back… To look at you. And all I could do was look at you and smile… and then giggle… You made me feel like a teen again. Like a teen. A teen that was experiencing love for the first time and at first sight.
 
I liked it when you asked what my perfume was. I really love it and it being noticed was some kind of a reward for me. And my choices.
 
“  ‘Angel’  ”, I said.
 
We went inside Starbucks and stayed… a long time. If someone had told me this could happen, that you would show interest in me and wanna hear ME talk, I would have laughed in his face. But you did… And I fell for you all over again. For all this ‘you” that was revealed to me during those hours. My heart was pounding coz you were NOT what I expected or hoping. You were BETTER.
 
When you intertwined your fingers with mine, as we were walking on the street, I felt dizzy. Your fingers. With mine. Intertwined. A scene I had dreamt of more times that I d like to admit. And you had just done it. Without even thinking about it, I squeezed your fingers and I smiled, happily living my déjà vu that had never actually happened before. I wouldn’t dare look at you. I would faint or come on to you or say I love you. None of those wise choices. But I wanted you. I wanted you like hell. You were a man that had unknowingly done so many things for me… And I wanted to thank you. Thank you for everything. By pleasing you. Or .. or.. I kept having these thoughts in my mind, breathing heavily.
 
When I saw the photo booth, I pulled you towards it without even thinking about it. I don’t walk around with my camera in hand, and I really wanted to see my face next to yours. It proved to be a good idea as you wanted to do it again. And there, I couldn’t resist you. Picture number three, captured my lips kissing your neck. No reaction from you though. You were just.. frozen. We took our pictures and began walking towards the hotel again.
 
You wouldn’t speak and I was afraid you were bored. I figured you had enough of me, or you would have done something, wouldn’t you? I mean, I kissed you. I showed you that there was a little fire burning inside me. Actually, a big fucking Texas sized fire. So, truly and deeply hurt that JC Chasez didn’t hit on me, didn’t want to sleep with me, or even just fuck me, I spoke.
 
“I guess this is goodnight,” . I squeezed my fists to fight the urge to cry, trying to be rational and think that this was the last time I would ever see you, at the same time.
 
“…I guess”.. You said. And then I looked at you and saw this look of disappointment in your eyes. Was it? I couldn’t tell for sure. I was hoping it would be. I was hoping you d ask me for my number… Or invite me upstairs… We were outside your hotel anyway. But you said nothing. Nothing.
 
So I had to speak. I had to take this chance. One more time. Or I d kick myself forever.
 
 “I have something to give to you…” I said. I was so nervous. Never having done that before, I was nervous. Would you get the hint? How would you react? “It’s really nothing… Its actually funny”. I smiled to hide my terror. Yes, terror.
I opened my purse and took the condom out. I gave it to you with a request. I wasn’t going to look at you opening it. I wanted to walk away first. And then.. Que serra serra..
 
“Don’t open it now” I said.
 
“Ok..”, you replied, looking at the little box.
 
“Goodbye JC”.
 
I turned around and began to walk away, swallowing the tears that were running inside. What was I doing? Was I crazy? I was walking away? What if you never called my name? What if, what if, what if???
 
And the next thing I felt, was someone grabbing me, turning me around, and forcing his lips on me.
A million thoughts raced through my mind in a split second. Deep down I knew it was you, but it could be anyone, really. So my body tensed, panicking a little. Soon though, my eyes met your lust filled gaze, as you broke the kiss to breathe. I had no time to think or even resist as your lips covered my mouth again and your arms pulled me against your body. The times that I had dreamt of the first time I would taste your lips are more than I would like to admit. Your lips were so deliciously sexier than I had ever imagined them to be. They felt like heaven trapped between mine.
 
When realization that you were kissing me kicked in, my head began to spin even worse than it already was, and my knees felt incredibly weak.
 
I can’t forget how your tongue brushed and rolled around mine over and over again and your lips sucked mine hungrily. I was kissing you back the same way, praying that my knees wouldn’t fail me and my centre’s formed pool wouldn’t start dripping.
 
I wanted you. Like crazy. My body was on arousal alarm. Every breath, every heartbeat was for you.
 
You stopped and looked intensely into my eyes. Were you looking for something? I was all yours baby. Couldn’t you see?
 
Wasting no time, you grabbed my hand and took me in your hotel. We took the elevator up and I was relishing how worked up I had gotten you. Me. I had you panting; I had you hardening for me. This thought still amazes me.
 
I really didn’t know what to do when we got into your room. Undress you? Undress myself? Talk? Hush? Come on to you? Be submissive? I chose to invite you with my eyes and you took the hint. You stepped closer to me, put your hands on my face and began kissing me again. I couldn’t have enough of those kisses. Urgent, needy, passionate. I hesitantly slid my hands underneath your sweater. I wanted to feel your skin. I needed to. I grazed muscles, body hair and hard nipples, my mind trying to memorize the way they felt. My fingers burned at the contact and my stomach muscles contracted when I felt yours reacting to me. My hands began shaking and I suddenly got scared.
 
What would you think of me? Would you like me? Would I satisfy you? Would I be good enough for you?
 
Your fingers then proceeded to take my tube top off. I couldn’t take my eyes off of you and neither would you. And I felt like you were piercing my soul.
 
Nothing and no one could ever prepare me for how blue your eyes were. Never had I seen eyes like yours. Never had such eyes affected my life this much. Never had I been haunted by blue eyes before. Never will I again.
 
When I stood in front of you with my bra on and you moved to unclasp it, I wanted to die. When you took it off of me, I tried to cover my breasts somehow, hoping you wouldn’t notice my move. But you, sweet you, took my hands away and observing me, you said “You re beautiful”. When those words, whisper quiet, reached my ears, I thought I would lose my senses. When your palms grazed over my nipples and your hands fondled my breasts, I held my breath, hoping that this way I d freeze time, and you wouldn’t take those words back.
 
“Angela… you re beautiful”. I swallowed and allowed my breath to leave my lungs.
 
With a snails pace, your hands travelled all over my breasts, teasing my poor aching nipples. Still unable to realize that this was really happening I tried hard to fill my lungs with oxygen to prevent my body from losing its senses. Not a very wise thing to do. I hyperventilated myself. Especially when you pushed me gently to sit on the bed and kneeling in front of me, you began worshiping every inch of flesh that was at your disposal. JC Chasez. On his knees. For me.
 
How many times had my wild imagination created this very scene in my head? How many sleepless nights had I spent unceasingly adoring you inside my head? How many times had I stifled my moans while my fingers were pleasing myself thinking of you? How many times…
 
And that moment, there you were. Flesh and blood. I was living my fantasy.
 
“You taste so good.. I can kiss you forever” . Your words vibrated against my ear and cause another wave of liquid need to exit my body.
 
I thought I had wanted you in the past. Countless were the times when I thought I couldn’t breathe from this feeling of need that consumed me. But none of them can be compared to what I was feeling that moment. The need. The lust. The wanting. The desire.
 
Taking your sweater and wifebeater off with trembling fingers, I invited you to do as you pleased with me. Once again, you took the hint. Our eyes communicated even better than our minds.
 
I will never forget the grin on your face when you slid my skirt down my legs and saw my panties. You made me giggle and I guess it was contagious. And I swear, there is nothing cuter or more contagious in this world than your disarming smile and your giggle. I sometimes wonder how can people not fall in love with you instantly after you flash them this unbelievable smile. Not the camera smile. Not the smile that’s a part of your job. That genuine, heartfelt smile…
 
I had lost any ability to speak coherently by then. I could only speak in moans, sighs and nails digging in hot flesh.
 
When I saw you sit back and unbutton your jeans, my heart skipped a few beats. You took your pants off awfully slow as if to torture me. The look in your eyes, pure evil. Your lips, too red from kissing, matched your devilish impulses. My whole body shuddered and trembled at the thought, and seconds later the sight, of you crawling back between my legs.
 
Every nerve ending of my inner thighs screamed with pleasure as you stroked them and with the sexiest voice I had heard all night coming from your mouth, you whispered, “Can I touch you?”
 
You almost sent me right to my grave. Was that a question I had to answer? You expected me to?
 
“P..Please..”, I managed to mumble.
 
Slowly, your delicate fingers slid inside the crevice that was waiting for you like the Messiah, getting soaked with my desire, travelling all around to find the place that would make me gasp and shake. And they found that little spot very fast and precisely, while your tongue found my most sensitive spot behind my ear.
 
“You re so damn wet”, you growled distracting me.
 
“Its your fault”, I whispered in your ear, enjoying the sensations your breath against my wet ear gave me.
And then, you took my hand and placed it on your arousal, something that made me shudder and grow impatient. “And this is your fault”.
 
I was responsible for that hardness. I knew a man didn’t need much to reach that stage, but still I felt so proud of myself. You were aroused because of me. Not another woman. ME. And soon, my pelvis shook uncontrollably and my legs shut, trapping your fingers in between them.
 
When I located my voice, I tried to speak.
 
“JC.. you..”
 
You had made me cum. I wanted to cry. You had granted me with the first orgasm I ever had that wasn’t a result of my own explorations. No other had. You had.
 
You shushed me. “I want you” you said.
 
Three simple words. I never imagined three simple words would ever make me this happy. I had four simple words for you. I want you too. Instead of using those, I slid my hand inside your underwear, grazed the head of your penis and used three words as well.
 
“Take them off..”
 

[::-::Continue::-::]