
i've already broken my rules for you
i can't bear to break my heart too.
i'm trying to keep my pain in my past.
and start something completely new.
can i please just be with you and
not have to fear losing you to something
that i could have had an influence on?
i want to be your escape
and to be something that makes you better
not that you are not good yourself
but i want you to be safe with me
possibly because if you are safe
then i don't have to worry about
something happening and losing you.
i promise i will try my hardest
to be everything you want-for you to be happy.
but i can't watch you hurt yourself,
or put yourself in danger.
i want to be your safety
and everything that is right for you.
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why do i please everyone else?
even if i am not happy
if it pleases someone else, then it is good
to be perfect for so many different
people is such a pressure.
i am myself
but am not really pleasing myself.
i make the decisions based on
what others say is good
regardless of the pain
that they will never know.
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i want to love with all that i am
so tell me why i push it all away
why i can't get close to anyone
without fearing
why i push away acceptance
when that is what i crave
how i can change so easily to be
what someone else wants
why i am a pushover and
just deal with it
when i know there is more than this