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I'm in a strange place, and can't find my way out;

There are people who say they care,

but that I seriously doubt.

My world is filled with confusion and pain;

It's hard to see the sunshine,

when your days are consumed by rain.

They say 'all the world's a stage', and if that is true;

Why won't the curtain come down,

and my part in life be through?

I wake up sometimes, and don't know who I am;

And at times...I really just don't give a damn.

It's all way too hard, and there's nothing I want more;

Than to hide inside myself, and forever lock the door.

At least then I can rest, no one will bother me;

And after I lock the door,

I'll gladly throw away the key.

Then forever in silence...Is where I will be;

And I won't have to act...I can just be me.

You'll Never Know

Please don't laugh when you look at me;

I may be the best friend there ever could be.

I'd be the shoulder to cry on,

when tears start to fall;

And if you ever needed to talk,

all you'd have to do is call.

When darkness closes in on you,

and you begin to fill with fear;

Just take a deep breath and look around -

I promise I'd be near.

I have two arms to hug with,

and two hands to hold onto yours;

I'd always be there when you needed me,

No matter the reason, or the cause.

I have a heart of gold, at least that's what they say;

But now you'll never know because,

You took one look, and turned away.

The End

Goodbye dear friend, peace is near;

This is the end, the time is here.

Just on more pill, should shut the door,

It won't be long, til I am no more.

I am so sorry, I could not stay;

But the time had come, for me to go away.

Do not cry...Don't shed a tear;

I'm not really gone, I'll always be near.

Every memory you have, or thought that you think;

I will be with you...This will be my link.

Remember the good times...never the bad;

Remember me happy...and never sad.

It's time to go, this all must end;

Remember I'll love you always, my friend.

Help

I sit here now, and feel empty inside;

I want to run...I want to hide.

Far away from the darkness that's consuming me;

I wish it would stop, and I would be set free.

Nightmares wake me, when I try to sleep;

The dark place I'm in, seems so very deep.

As I drown in this place, I scream and I shout;

And I wonder if I will ever, find my way out.

As each moment goes past, I try to fight my way back;

But the days seem to merge, and I soon lose all track.

I don't like where I am, or the things I say and do;

And I don't know why I'm sharing my thoughts with you.

I've tried to fight this battle all alone;

But it's so hard to wage a war on your own.

There's no way I can do it,

that's a hard confession to make;

Then again...

Maybe it's not that hard,

when it's your life that's at stake.

Moments of Silence

There once was a time, when folks use to say,

That 'silence is golden', that was the way.

It seems times have changed as the years drifted past,

Now folks hope and pray, that the silence won't last.

It makes them uncomfortable to sit in a room,

When nothing is spoken; it's much like a tomb.

Some squirm as they sit and wait for someone to talk,

Others quickly get up, and go for a walk.

Anything to escape the moment of displeasure,

When nothing is said; time is so hard to measure.

So now that you've finished reading this poem,

Please say or do something,

Don't act like a gnome.

What If?

I wonder what your life would be like,

if I had never been born.

And this heart that beats inside my chest,

would not even once have been torn.

Many thoughts stir around inside my head,

As each day of pain goes past.

I sit and wonder just how much longer,

This torment inside can last.

Thoughts and feelings I have no control over,

are eating me up inside.

The question I stop and ask myself is;

"What if I had just died?"

I sit in a crowd, yet feel so alone,

And wonder "What am I doing here?"

I should be happy with people I love,

So why do I feel so much fear?

Once again, I wonder what your life would be like

if I had never been born.

And much more importantly, if I died now,

Just how much would you mourn?

To Those I Left Behind

To those I left behind I say

Please do not grieve.

It was my choice to just give up and leave.

You all tried so hard, but to no avail,

Life's just one more thing I tried, but did fail.

They say that death brings no escape,

It's just the beginning of strife.

But always remember that I am the one,

Who chose to pick up the knife.

I could not handle the hand I was dealt.

I was all alone...At least that's how I felt.

Please don't ever blame yourself-Your fault...This is not.

The truth is that while on this earth

Your friendships meant a lot.

It's just that after trying so hard

I could not fight any more.

The strength I once had, decided to leave...

And walked right out the door.

I'm sorry for all the pain and hurt I caused

I never meant to make you frown.

I'm sorry for the times I made you waste...

And I'm sorry I brought you down.

Now there's nothing for me to say

My reasons you may never understand or see.

The only thing left on my 'things to do' list,

Is ask you to "Please forgive me".

Peace (a.k.a. Freedom (In Death))

The sun sets on another day,

Here I sit, and here I'll stay.

Until it's time to say goodbye,

Then on the wind, I will fly.

Fly to a place where peace will be,

And happiness really is the key.

Please don't cry. Don't shed a tear,

For where I am, there is no fear.

No pain or hurt, guilt or shame,

No differences dividing, for we're all the same.

We 'live' together...united as one.

With nothing to fear...no reason to run.

My Prayer

Lord,

Please give me knowledge, and help me understand;

Guide me gently on my path, with your loving hand.

Help me hear, when you speak to me;

Give me a vision, I can clearly see.

Help me remember, when I read Your Word;

Help me never doubt, that You are Lord.

Help me feel Your love, let me know that You're there;

For I know in my heart, You really do care.

Help me act upon the things, you want me to do;

Help my love and faith, grow in You.

These things I pray, in the strongest name there is;

The name of my Saviour, Christ Jesus.