MY FANTASY SCENEEverybody has a fantasy about the perfect scene with a great love and I haveon too. I don't relaly fantasize about it much, but I did it today and I even made a drawing of it. I fantasize about me lying on a blanket on the grass under the stars with that love surrounded by trees and a picknick basket next to us having deep conversations about subjects never really talked about in the dialy life. It's kinde of a standard fantasy and how much I don't like standard things, sometimes it's fun. Sometimes fantasizing about someting standard is nice. I try a lot not to be typical and I try a lot to aboud it around me, but it's not bad.
For the rest of today.The resless period of yesterday is kind of over, but I'm still stuck with this weird, unexplainable preminision feelings.
And for more of today, i have these deep desires again. Having a serious relationship for sven months and then to be suddenly single again is so tough. Being single again is great of course. i get to do my own thing, what I want, being totally free. But once in a while I miss tose fun stuff of a relationship. Lying in his arms, sharing our feelings with each other. But well, it'll come again when it's time, rushing things won't do any good. Like they say:"Don't try to find love, love will find you." and "love comes when you least expect it."
January 20th 2003
