1. Jurassic Park

8/30/02 BUT I HATE KEY LIME!

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8/28/02 FRANCES PRESENTS THE TOP TEN MOVIES OF HER CHILDHOOD
Those movies that bring warm fuzzy memories to her heart based upon the personal circumstances that transpired around the viewing of them. Yes, many a boy growing up in the late seventies, early eighties have strong ties to Star Wars not because of any cinematographic perfection of these gems, but because as a kid, they were blown away. That and the cool toys. I cannot entirely possess such childhood memories; while I grew up at the right time, I did not see the movies until my freshman year of high school. But my top ten list will present to my web viewer(s) (Hi, Uncie Herb!) the campy movies of my childhood that shaped my life and touched my soul.

10. Pinnochio I have to give kudos, or in Wil-Wheaton-speak, "hella mad props" to the first movie I ever saw in a theater.

9. Desert Rose I was a little older when I saw this, but it was right in my American Girl phase, and the main character reminded me of Molly. I also wanted to be her. The white shirt and rolled-up jeans look of the forties fascinated me to no end.

8. The Parent Trap There was a time when the Disney channel played this movie every ding dang day, and I would watch it, every ding dang day. "Let's get together, yeah yeah yeah!" Haley Mills, man. Haley Mills.

7. Radio Flyer I actually saw this when I was twelve...which may just barely meet the childhood mark. But how cool is it that two kids younger than me could build a working airplane out of a frickin' wagon? It's amazing! I love crap like that. The technical shit. It's why I almost became an engineer. I also remember writing a story around the time (inspired by a boy I liked) about a wizard boy who was able to turn a toddler's wagon into a flying toddler's wagon, thus stirring the heart of the young heroine that represented my alter-ego. Woo hoo.

6. The Three Amigos In my childhood, simply for "myyyyy little butter-cup....sweeeeet little butter-cup." And now? For Steve Martin, the genius jack-of-all-trades. And, "would you say it's a plethora of pinatas?" followed by a pleading, "why, el Guapo?"

5. Stand By Me Though my favorite movie now adays, this doen't rank so high on my childhood list, mainly because I had too little understanding of it at the time. But I do remember being absolutely freaked out by it. I thought it was a scary movie. I thought "give me some skin" meant that the guy would actually take a knife, cut off some of his skin, and hand it over. I also remember the priest mentioning this movie in mass, alluding that Christ has "got your back."

4. Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom It's tough for me to come out and say it, but I think this was the best Indiana Jones movie. Well...Last Crusade was the best, Temple of Doom is the most exhilarating. (Side-note: while Raiders did have the classic scenes of Indy swiping his chin while considering the idol and the boulder-rolling, I still think this was the weakest of the movies, but maybe that's cause I saw it recently, and not during my childhood. Thus, I am just missing that special bond to this movie that is present with the other two.) That bug scene still creeps me out. And the mining car chase? Claaaaaasic.

3. Beetlejuice That Day-oh scene was a classic. But I was only seven when I saw this, and did not really understand the term "special effects." So I thought everything was real. I thought Michael Keaton's head really shrank. I thought there were really people who looked like they were cut in half and run over and decapitated. I was a messed-up little person.

2. Who Framed Roger Rabbit? I remember seeing this in the theater with my mom, and buying a little plastic figure of Roger selling toon cigars. This also marks my very first video cassette purchase. I begged my dad, saying that I would, "watch it EVERY DAY." And watch it every day I did, with my cousin, who was smarter at taped it off the tv. It's funny--I remember how the cartoon characters interspersed in a live-action film was such an incredible concept to me--they would simply light up in my eyes. Now when I see it again, it seems so hum-drum next to our current-day digital capabilities. But as a child, it blew my mind. My favorite scenes are the two ducks having a piano fight, when Eddie enters ToonLand and runs over that cow on the road making a farting noise, and when he picks up the sword that sings, "When the witch cries..."

1. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade Because I saw it in the theater with my uncle and cousin. I felt al cool 'cause I got to go with the big guys. I remember laughing hilariously when the guy in the library/cathedral stamps books. I remember being horrified when the guy shrivels up from drinking from the fake grail. I remember singing the theme song with my cousin for days after: "Da da da da! Da da daaah! DA DA DA DAAAH! DA DA DAAH DAAH DAAH!"

Now when I see it, the old sentimentality rises up in me like no other. Ford echoing his younger River Phoenix self, "It belongs in a museum!" That first time he appears on screen, I whoop a big, "yipee!" I get teary-eyed when Sean Connery, holding on to his son's dear life says, "Indiana--Indiana, let it go." And something that I did not pick up on when I was younger: Harrison Ford is hot. He could be the hottest man alive. When he gives that scoundrel-ish grin, eeee!

Honorable Mentions: Gremlins II. Gizmo was so cute! And I liked when that one gremlin sings New York, New York with the other gremlins backing him up with, "da da dadada, da da dadada, da da dadada-da!" (To the trained mind, this is very different from the above-typed Indiana Jones theme.)
The Breakfast Club. Don't you, forget about me.

Typical 80's child movies that just didn't make the cut: Goonies--I just wished they would say "die." Ghostbusters--Sorry, not my childhood. Labyrinth--David Bowie creeped me out. Back to the Future--also not a part of my childhood. The Princess Bride--book was better. Pretty Woman--saw for the first time when I was 19. Pretty In Pink--shameless throwing around of racial slurs with the Long Duck Dong character pissed me off.

If you're a child of the 80's and all about the reminicing, especially about the toys, I strongly suggest visiting the x-entertainment website. For good old campy fun.

Well that's it for now. Coming soon: Top ten list of early nineties movies. I bet you can't wait.