The honorees, as well, have honed their social skills over the years. They are more likely to be gracious recipients of praise than, say, giggling teenagers or blushing brides. With a lifetime of memories, they are ready to reap the rewards of their hard work and all they have helped accomplish. And they always look fantastic: by now, they know what looks good on them, what to serve, and certainly, who their friends are. If it's a surprise, they know to take it well, not storm out of the room in embarrassment. There should certainly be no worries about noise levels, drugs or alcohol. It's a recipe for a very special gathering.

On Feb. 10, "Rabbi J," aka Rabbi Jonathan Hausman, was toasted on his 10th year at Ahavath Torah Congregation in Stoughton, and his own 50th year. Hausman, who teaches in the Senior Adult Program at the nearby Striar JCC, rode in November's 400-mile bike ride in Israel to benefit The Alyn Pediatric Hospital. "425 riders raised about $2.5 million," he said, dressed for the part in black spandex pants. To make it a fundraiser, there was an ad book, balloon raffle, cocktail/hors d'oeuvres hour, beer and wine, and videos are available. The Rabbi's favorite snacks, including strawberry Twizzlers and ice water, adorned each table. Following his rebuttal of the roast, there were desserts and coffee. To keep ticket prices down to $18, the Sisterhood and Brotherhood shopped and cooked, and USY kids served and manned the coat room.

Sisterhood member Dale Appel recalled the surprise 60th birthday party for her mother, Iris Katz Cohen, who passed away in October, 1991 at age 64. "She was totally surprised to see her extended family and close friends," she said. "I am so glad we did this for her, as she never did make it to retirement age,” she added.

It need not always be dinner. Last March, Congregation Sons of Israel in Peabody hosted a Sunday morning surprise 65th birthday kiddush for President Sumner Greenberg. "Everyone had a good time, and the food was excellent," he recalls. The spread, organized by his wife Bea, included kugel, whitefish, lox, herring, bagels, pastry, and all kinds of eggs. About 65 congregants and coworkers toasted the big event. "I was very appreciative that so many people got up early on a Sunday for my birthday," he said.

And heck, events may not always require an occasion, or involve sit-down dining either. "Our 'Classics Open Mic & Singalong: You & Broadway!,' held regularly since 2003, honors and features seniors," said Brookline Community Center for the Arts director Dan Marshall. The average performer age exceeds 65, and the event is run by seniors as well. "Broadcast numerous times on Brookline Access TV," said Marshall, "it is a definite hit with Brookline viewers, as well as our large senior community!" The next Singalong will be held on March 25 from 2-5 pm at the Sussman House, 50 Pleasant St.

Assisted living facilities are custom-made for senior events. At Cadbury Commons near Porter Square, Cambridge, a Dec. 13 Holiday Party also celebrated the 60th anniversary of residents Abe and Helen Hoffman. Amid colorful decor, hors d'oeuvres, a lavish buffet with Chilean sea bass, fancy pastries and other fare, piano and carolers, attendees from every nationality listened to Abe Hoffman read a Maxine Kumin poem, "Looking Back in My Eighty-first Year," from the December, 1946 New Yorker. (Ironically, Helen is now 81.) "The line 'Sixty years my lover' echoes our anniversary today," said Hoffman. "And it includes the line 'Kilroy was here,' which I remember so well from my World War II service in Europe," he added.

New York native Abe lives on the third floor, while Helen lives in "Morningside," a ground-level unit for residents with dementia. Director of Community Programs Susan Burgess explained that Cadbury has three levels of care (Independent, Assisted and Special Care/Dementia), where some Assisted Living residences don’t. "A great asset of multi-level Assisted Living residences like Cadbury Commons is that couples can remain living together when one of them needs special care," she said. All residents help plan the galas. Executive Director Steven Ellsweig noted the always-full activity calendar. "We continue to put the resident first," he said. A seder is being planned for next month.

“My mother was admitted to the Jewish Home for the Aging in Reseda, California on Dec. 28, 1993,” said M. David Cohen of Tifereth Israel in Malden. The major Los Angeles earthquake of 1994 occurred two weeks later. "She said it was like an 'A' ticket at Disneyland when the earthquake struck, almost under her bed, in Northridge and Reseda," he recalled.

Cohen and others at the Home wanted to do something special for their parents and relatives, following the fear and turmoil, and created the “Largest Mother's Day Celebration in the World.“ A great success, it was attended by family members, as well as celebrities. "Mary Hart of 'Entertainment Tonight' was the charming emcee, and comedians Jack Carter and Jan Murray, Marylin and Monty Hall of 'Let's Make A Deal' performed," he said, adding that they must have done something right, because this year, May 13 will mark the 13th annual event (Hart was the emcee again last year). "It's the party's Bat Mitzvah!," he said. "Until my mother died in January 1996, she always referred to these parties as some of her fondest memories," he added.

The JCC's Friday Kosher lunch program at 1550 Beacon St. in Brookline holds regular fetes for some remarkable seniors who donate any amount to the program. "On Dec. 15," said Lillian Mamon, Senior Adults Program Coordinator at the Leventhal-Sidman JCC, "we celebrated Edith Pollack's 80th birthday with the Mashke band and a cake." Pollack, a longtime JCC volunteer, is active at Hebrew Senior Life's 100 Centre St. residence. "We celebrated Al Korn's 96th on Feb. 9," added Mamon, explaining that Korn co-founded the YES ('Young Energetic Seniors') Club with his wife Anne, led a current events class, served meals and ran JCC rummage sales. On April 13, Shirley Horblitt's 80th will feature the Solomon Schechter Choral group. Horblitt, a longtime JCC volunteer, ran the Young Judea and BBYO office in Boston. This past fall, former opera singer and 1550 Beacon St. resident Frances Harpel celebrated her 100th.

"It had all the trimmings of the fabulous Waltham Westin Hotel's Champagne Brunch, plus a special cake," said attendee Rosian Zerner of Newton, who, with friends from the local German-Jewish Dialogue group, mingled with others from The AJC Muslim-Jewish Dialogue Group and the Black-Jewish Economic Roundtable, and Consuls Dr. Wolfgang Vorwerk of Germany and Nadav Tamir of Israel. AJC Senior Vice President Mel Shuman cited Larry's attributes alphabetically; AJC National Executive Director David Harris, JCC President Rick Mann, Lowenthal’s wife Pauline and daughter Jessica spoke as well. ""It was one of the most memorable experiences of my life," said Lowenthal. “Life is short and so is public memory, and it is a beautiful and moving experience to be publicly acknowledged for the work you do."

Hotel buffets can be all-in-one logistical solutions, says Appel, who recommends a private room near the buffet. Her family did this at the Boston Harbor Hotel for her Aunt Sylvia's 80th. "My aunt lives in Florida and her children live in New Jersey and Colorado. She had no idea that we would all be together for her birthday which, coincidentally, was Mother's Day," she recalled.

"In September, 2006, I was at Emerson's Cutler Majestic Theater for the presentation of a lifetime achievement award in comedy to Norm Crosby," recalled Joyce Linehan of Ashmont Media. It was also the Dorchester native's 79th birthday, and Mayor Menino and City Councillor John Tobin designated Sept. 15 “Norm Crosby Day” in Boston and Massachusetts. "Crosby said that he was particularly touched by the lifetime achievement award, since it came from his hometown," said Linehan, who added that Crosby's stand-up set that evening was a reminder of why he so deserved his distinction.

While not every senior honoree can do a Crosby stand-up routine, each is special in his/her own way. Let's keep the toasts coming!

This article appeared in the March 2, 2007 Jewish Advocate.

Post-50 parties hail memory, lend meaning

By Susie Davidson

Why should the kids have all the fun? Parties and celebrations for the post-50 crowd can be just as colorful, fun and entertaining as the bnai mitzvah, Sweet 16's, weddings and engagement bashes we often read and hear about. Just think about all the fodder for gags, tributes, and anectodes to be explored while marking a 65th birthday, retiremement party, 50th anniversary or other such milestone.

The honorees, as well, have honed their social skills over the years. They are more likely to be gracious recipients of praise than, say, giggling teenagers or blushing brides. With a lifetime of memories behind them, they are ready to reap the rewards of their hard work, happy to see the fruits of their labors, and appreciative of all they have helped to accomplish. There should certainly be no worries about noise levels, drugs or alcohol. And senior honorees always look fantastic: by now, they know what looks good on them, how long it will take them to get to the event, what to serve, and certainly, who their friends are. If it's a surprise, they know to take it well and not to storm out of the room in embarrassment. All in all, it's a recipe for a successful, substantial and very special gathering indeed.

"Rabbi J," aka Rabbi Jonathan Hausman of Ahavath Torah Congregation in Stoughton, was toasted on Sat., Feb. 10 on the occasion of his 10th year at the synagogue. It is also his own 50th year. Hausman, who teaches in the Senior Adult Program at the nearby Striar Jewish Community Center, is an avid cyclist who rode in November's 400-mile charity bike ride in Israel to benefit The Alyn Pediatric Hospital. "425 riders raised about $2.5 million for the Hospital," he said, and for the party, he dressed for the part in black spandex pants. To make the simcha a fundraiser, the synagogue produced an ad book and held a balloon raffle, a cocktail hour with hors d'oeuvres, and sold beer and wine. The Rabbi's favorite snacks, which included strawberry Twizzlers and pitchers of ice water, adorned each table. Following his rebuttal of the roast, there were desserts, tea and coffee.

The Sisterhood and Brotherhood did the food shopping, cooking and serving, and USY kids helped out in the coat room and as food servers. This helped keep the ticket price down to $18. Ahavath Torah is also selling videos of the event for $10 to increase the fundraising from this memorable evening.

Synagogue member Dale Appel will always remember the surprise 60th birthday party she helped plan for her mother, Iris Katz Cohen, in the late 1980s. "She was totally surprised to see her extended family and close friends," she said. "She passed away in October of 1991 at age 64," she added. "I am so glad we did this for her, as she never did make it to retirement age."

Successful senior parties need not always be dinner. Last March, Congregation Sons of Israel in Peabody hosted a Sunday morning surprise 65th birthday kiddush for synagogue President Sumner Greenberg. "Everyone had a good time, and the breakfast-type food was excellent," he recalls. The spread, organized by his wife Bea, included kugel, whitefish salad, lox, bagels, pastry, and all kinds of eggs - scrambled, boiled, or omelettes with mushrooms, onions and peppers. "There was coffee and cold drinks," said Greenberg, "herring, and more that I can't remember." About 65 congregants and coworkers toasted the big event. "I was very surprised," he recalls, "but mainly, I was really appreciative of the fact that so many people got up early on a Sunday for my birthday!"

And heck, events may not always require a specific occasion, or involve sit-down eating, either. "Our 'Classics Open Mic & Singalong: You & Broadway!,' held bi-monthly or monthly since the Brookline Community Center for the Arts closed (and previously held weekly or bi-weekly since 2003), honors and features seniors," said BCCA director Dan Marshall. The average age of performers exceeds 65, and the event is run by seniors as well. "It has been broadcast numerous times on Brookline Access TV," said Marshall, "and is a definite hit with Brookline viewers, as well as our large senior community!" The next Singalong will be held on Sunday, March 25, from 2-5 pm at the Sussman House, at 50 Pleasant St. in Brookline.

Assisted living facilites are custom-made for senior events. At Cadbury Commons near Porter Square, Cambridge, a Dec. 13 Holiday Party was also the setting for the 60th anniversary celebration of residents Abe and Helen Hoffman. The scene was festive, with colorful decor and flowers, hors d'oeuvres, a lavish buffet with Chilean sea bass, fancy pastries and other delicious fare, piano music and carolers. Attendees from every nationality and country of origin mingled and listened as Abe Hoffman read a poem by Maxine Kumin, "Looking Back in My Eighty-first Year," which had appeared in the New Yorker the week of their December, 1946 wedding. He also revealed that Helen is now 81. A New York native, Abe lives on the third floor, while Helen lives in "Morningside," a ground-level unit for residents with dementia. "The poem's line 'Sixty years my lover' echoes our 60th anniversary today," said Hoffman. "And it includes the line 'Kilroy was here,' which I remember so well from my World War II service in Europe," he added.

Director of Community Programs Susan Burgess explained that Cadbury has three levels of care (Independent, Assisted and Special Care/Dementia), where some Assisted Living residences don’t. "A great asset of multi-level Assisted Living residences like Cadbury Commons is that couples can remain living together when one of them needs special care, and this relieves a tremendous burden on the caretaking partner," she said. And all residents help plan such galas. "Life at Cadbury fosters independence (even with assistance) and lifestyle choices," said Executive Director Steven Ellsweig, who noted that the activity calendar is always full. "We continue to put the resident first," he said. A seder is being planned for next month.

"While living in Los Angeles, I became a volunteer 'active participant' at the Jewish Home for the Aging in Reseda, California," says M. David Cohen of Temple Tifereth Israel in Malden. His mother had been admitted there on Dec. 28, 1993. "We experienced the major Los Angeles earthquake of 1994 just two weeks after she entered," he recalled. "She said it was like an 'A' ticket at Disneyland when the earthquake struck, almost under her bed, in Northridge and Reseda."

Cohen and others at the Home wanted to do something special for their parents and relatives following the fear and turmoil they had been through. "We got together and created the very first 'Largest Mother's Day Celebration in the World' that following Mothers' Day," he said. A great success, it was attended by parents, children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren, as well as celebrities who lived in the greater Los Angeles area. "Mary Hart of 'Entertainment Tonight' was the charming emcee, and comedians Jack Carter and Jan Murray, Marylin and Monty Hall of 'Let's Make A Deal' lent their energy," he said, adding that they must have done something right, because this year, May 13 will mark the 13th annual event (Hart was the emcee again last year). "It's the party's Bat Mitzvah!," he said. Cohen is understandably proud that he helped launch the event. "Until my mother died in January 1996, she always referred to these parties as some of her fondest memories," he said.

The JCC's Friday Kosher lunch program at 1550 Beacon St. holds regular fetes for some remarkable seniors who make the choice to celebrate with the JCC by giving a donation of any amount to the program. "On Dec. 15," said Lillian Mamon, Senior Adults Program Coordinator at the Leventhal-Sidman JCC in Newton, "we celebrated Edith Pollack's 80th birthday at a Chanukah party with the Mashke band and a beautiful birthday cake." Pollack, a longtime JCC volunteer, has taken a leadership position at Hebrew Senior Life's 100 Centre St. residence. "We celebrated Al Korn's 96th birthday on Feb. 9," added Mamon, explaining that Korn and wife Anne joined the former JCC at 50 Sutherland Rd. in Brookline when they retired in the early 1980s. "They founded the YES CLUB ('Young Energetic Seniors') with other new retirees, have helped serve meals and run rummage sales for the JCC, and Al has also led a very popular current events class," she said. Upcoming celebrations include Shirley Horblitt's 80th on April 13, which will feature the Solomon Schechter Choral group. Horblitt, a longtime JCC volunteer, has worked in the Jewish community all of her working years, and ran the Young Judea and BBYO office at 10 Tremont St. "She adopted the children, went with them on conventions and to this day has kept up relationships with her 'family,'" said Mamon. This past fall, they also celebrated Frances Harpel's 100th birthday. A resident of 1550 Beacon St., Harpel had a career as an opera singer.

On Feb. 11, Larry Lowenthal was honored on the occasion of his 18th year as Executive Director of the Boston chapter of the American Jewish Congress. "It was one of the most memorable experiences of my life," he said. "My wife Pauline and daughter Jessica both spoke at the event, and their presentations moved people to tears," he added.

"It was a wonderful event with all the trimmings of the fabulous Waltham Westin Hotel's Champagne Brunch, plus a special cake for Larry," said attendee Rosian Zerner of Newton, who attended with friends from the local German-Jewish Dialogue group. "There were also people from the AJC Muslim-Jewish Dialogue Group and from the Black-Jewish Economic Roundtable, Dr. Wolfgang Vorwerk, German Consul General, and of course all sorts of luminaries and leaders from the Jewish community, including Nadav Tamir, Consul General of Israel," she said. AJC Senior Vice President and Friend of the New England Holocaust Memorial Mel Shuman creatively listed Larry's attributes in alphabetical order, and AJC National Executive Director David Harris and NEHM and JCC President Rick Mann toasted the honoree as well. "I realize now that no one should ever refuse an opportunity to be honored in the community," said Lowenthal of the event. "Life is short and so is public memory, and it is a beautiful and moving experience to be publicly acknowledged for the work you do." These hotel buffets can be an all-in-one logistical solution, says Appel. "If you are having a smaller crowd but want a good food selection, consider a hotel or restaurant that has its own big buffet for brunch/lunch, and get a private room situated where you can easily walk into the buffet," she said. Her family did just this at the Boston Harbor Hotel for her Aunt Sylvia's 80th birthday. They had had a family wedding at a country club the night before, so everyone was gathered in Massachusetts. "My aunt lives in Florida and her children live in New Jersey and Colorado. She had no idea that we would all be together the next day for her birthday which, coincidentally, was Mother's Day," said Appel.

"In September, 2006, I was at Emerson's Cutler Majestic Theater for the presentation of a lifetime achievement award in comedy to Norm Crosby," recalled Joyce Linehan of Ashmont Media of Dorchester. It was also the comic and Dorchester native's 79th birthday, and the award was co-presented by the Boston Comedy Festival and Emerson College. "As part of the celebration, Crosby was presented with three different citations at City Hall, declaring Sept. 15 'Norm Crosby Day' in the City of Boston and the Commonwealth of Massachusetts," said Linehan. Mayor Menino and City Councillor John Tobin gave the honors, as did Representative Kevin Honan at the State House. "Crosby said that he had been presented with many awards throughout his career, but he was particularly touched by the lifetime achievement award, since it came from his hometown," said Linehan, who added that Crosby's stand-up set that evening was a reminder of why he so deserved his distinction.

While not every senior honoree can do a Crosby stand-up routine, each is special in his/her own way. Let's keep the toasts coming!