This article appeared in the March 18, 2004 Jewish Advocate.

The role of one’s life:

Writer Ellen Steinbaum performs one-woman show

By Susie Davidson

Advocate Correspondent

"There are only two or three human stories and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely as if they had never happened before," says Ellen Steinbaum, quoting from Willa Cather, at the beginning of her new one-person show CenterPiece. The show premieres this weekend at The Actors’ Workshop in Boston.

Steinbaum, a poet and journalist whose Boston Globe City Weekly column “City Type” explores the city through the eyes of its writers, believes that our lives are often a personified patchwork. “There are the pieces we get from the family we are born into, and ones from the families and communities of friends we create for ourselves,” she says. “There are pieces from the work we do in the world. And then there are the pieces, often harder to find, that help us find our place in the center of our lives – those we work hardest for, which make us whole.”

The play is autobiographical, incorporating earliest influences such as the story of her great-grandparents, who were actually betrothed as infants. When her great-grandmother called it off years later, she became ill. “The rabbi said it might be because she had broken this promise made before God,” recalled Steinbaum. The engagement was renewed, her great-grandmother recovered, and they got married. “That was my earliest lesson that sometimes as much as we plan, our lives are ruled by things beyond our control,” she says. “Sometimes random minutes determine the direction we take.”

In the play, she speaks of meeting her husband, Carl, and later, while home raising their children, beginning to write, but still feeling unfulfilled. She worked as an AIDS volunteer and started writing poetry. The family moved to Boston in 1995; her husband became seriously ill with colon cancer in 1995. Following his death at age 58 in 1996, Steinbaum continued to find her own methods of coping and sustainability, without the structure of her marriage and raising her now-grown children.

She experienced a “random moment” at a potluck dinner given by single women. “The reaction to the salad I brought made me think about the kind of person I wanted to be, one who would bother to make salad even if it was only for myself,” she recalls. “Other random minutes lead me to find more satisfying work as a writer, comfort in the circle of friends and family that continues to expand, and to recognize the strength that is part of my heritage.” Steinbaum’s poems have appeared in Midstream, Larcom Review, and The Christian Science Monitor.

Writer Ken Foster maintains that there may be only one universal story, that “somebody lost something.” Her 2001 book, Afterwords, is a collection of poems about loss and her journey back. “But these poems are reminders that the ‘afterwords’ can also speak of surviving with what remains,” she says. For balance, she also writes corporate marketing communications materials, where, she says, “the language must work toward a measurable objective.”

A Wilmington, Delaware native, Steinbaum is an active member of Temple Israel, where she organizes exhibits and co-chairs the cemetery committee (her husband is buried in the Temple’s cemetery in Wakefield). She has also co-chaired a Women's Kallah, which focuses on issues of social justice. Her Judaic heritage, she says, is reflected in her play. Her grandmother lighting the Shabbat candles, her grandfather having his once-a-week post-synagogue glass of schnapps, and a 55-years running family seder are all there. “I remember being at that seder as the little girl in the middle of all the great-aunts and uncles and now I'm one of the organizers and, dare I say, matriarchs,” she says.

While Steinbaum’s book chronicled her feelings during her husband's illness and after his death, the play is about her own life. “CenterPiece is a play about the patchwork of life experiences we all share, from assimilating family legends to learning about love and loss, to finding our voices and claiming center stage in our own lives,” she explains.

“These are the details of my life, as a daughter, wife, mother, widow, writer and poet,” she continues. “But except for the details, it could be anyone's life, with the struggle to figure ourselves out and move ourselves into the center of our lives, integrating what we believe and what is important to us and what we draw satisfaction from, so that we can stand in the center of all the details and feel whole.”

“The play is my story,” she says. “But I believe it's also everyone else's.”

Tickets are $15 for CenterPiece, which will be performed on March 19, 20 and 27 at 8 p.m., and March 21 and 28 at 2 p.m. at The Actors Workshop, 327 Summer St. Boston (in the Fort Point Channel area, about five blocks from South Station). Friday and Saturday performances are at 8 p.m., Sundays are at 2 p.m. To reserve tickets, which can be paid for at the door by cash or check, call 617-721-2064. For more information, please visit www.ellensteinbaum.com/centerpiece.