Bitter much?

"Sleep Of Ages (The Road To Ruin)"

I watch the dark shadows as they're creeping across the floor
They eat away at the light, insatiable, and wanting more
My heart dies sharply, stabbed by the icy edge of the black
I offer no resistance, a drought of want, not of lack

Enveloped by a blanket of sorrow, pain, and broken promises
I dream a sleep of ages, forever longing for existence
For pitiful expressions of loves that live only as lies
But represent the only love that has filtered through this life

- Now I'm begging the question -
  That I'm posing to myself
  About unapologetic hatred
  And a life that's long past help
  About the power of silence
  And the truths it conveys
  About the comfort of deceit
  And of faith long decayed

Blood runs cold, eyes run dry, and my smile is rusted shut
As I scan for a signal that says I might not be the only one
Branded bitter by the fire, I carry the mark of disbelief
In myself, in you, in everyone, and hope that life is more than grief

- Chorus -

My breath is hard to come by as I struggle to understand
How a life can be held hostage, enclosed within your hand
Dragged along the road to ruin, leaving parts of myself behind
Grated down to my essence, a map of hate that's well defined

- Chorus -

"Cheating Death"

A new dawn is breaking before me
The sky is blood red dripping fear
And gathering on the horizon
A death starved another year

Life, it brings us no mercy
As it beats down from above
Casting shadows in the darkness
Drowning salvation in blood

- Waves of sorrow come crashing over me -
  I stand alone, a lost soul with no reprieve
  The aura of blackness, a beginning, not an end
  As I find myself cheating death again

There's an air of desperation
Clouding stagnant in my face
Overpowering my every breath
Wrapped up in a cold embrace

The dark, it brings me comfort
As the landscape disappears
The idols of pain are hidden
And dreams are placed upon a spear

- Chorus -

Running blindly as fast as I can
Headlong into the master plan
A dream of ages dying on the vine
Land of belief, it surely isn't mine

- Chorus -

A new dawn is breaking before me
The sky is blood red dripping fear
And gathering on the horizon
A death starved another year

A New One

null"Loving Me Is A Crime"

Don't you ever try to tell me
That I was not worth the time
You must pay the price to suffer
'Cause loving me is a crime

Did you think that I might need you
To put my head back on straight
You said I saw a twisted reflection
When my eyes were blurred with hate

- Darlin' tell me there's another answer -
  'Cause I don't want to believe that this is it
  Darlin' tell me there's another reason
  Don't let me believe in my heart this is the script

No one ever tried to warn me
That I had become a lost cause
I was better left in the dark
Rather than have me admit my flaws

You treated me like I was broken
And I needed you to hold my hand
You never thought that I was
Strong enough to understand

- Chorus -

Don't you ever try to tell me
That I was not worth the time
You must pay the price to suffer
'Cause loving me is a crime

- Chorus -

From Poem To Song
"Black Midnight"

This is the answer to the question no one dares to ask
The solidified remnants of liqour clinging to the edge of the flask
Flicked aside with every sip to fall upon the ground
Trampled by the sullen masses without letting out a sound

This is the ladder we use to climb the sky
To force our way to heaven, to soar upon the high
Looking down on our creation and finding where we went wrong
So that we can fix ourselves and make everything belong

- But the world goes to sleep -
Under the blanket of stars
It becomes a black midnight
As darkness covers our scars
We lose ourselves in the ether
As we scream our lungs to fail
Our voices will last forever
Carrying our unheard tales

This is the reason, the fuel we burn to go
And in it's vapor trail slowly falls an ashen snow
The dark flakes wafting, drifting towards the ground
Burning up before landing, never to be found

This is the truth, the thing which we can't teach
The brass ring suspended by God just out of our reach
The shine of the metal wearing dull 'round the edge
Manifesting the apathy fallen upon our pledge

- Chorus -

This is the answer to the question no one dares to ask
Comfortable to sit alone and sip quietly from the cask
Throwing the cork hapazardly upon the cold tile
Drinking away the sorrows of a soul awaiting trial

I love this title
"Barbed Wire Rosary"

I'm searching inside to find the roots of my pain
To dig out the drama and sever the bane
The devils inside me wage war on themselves
Drown my hope in waves of their blood as it swells

- I'm tearing myself apart to salvage my soul -
And pull out from the ashes all the moments I stole
To cleanse my demons I throw myself on the pyre
While I'm clutching a rosary forged from barbed wire

I'm falling apart before my very own eyes
The vision in the mirror's an evil disguise
A mask on the war being waged in my head
That strips me to madness and leaves me for dead

- Chorus -

I'm dreaming of days when the violence subsides
When silence drowns out my concscience's cries

- Chorus -
To cleanse my demons I throw myself on the pyre
While I'm clutching a rosary forged from barbed wire

A Couple Of Poems
"The Murdered Planet"

Black snow litters the landscape
Falling from the sky like a rain of fire
Showering our vision with disappointment
While our purity gets buried under the weight

The clouds are ever thickening
Growing blacker and more numerous by the day
The sunlight struggles for a window
As we forget the feel of a warm touch

The stars hang as reminders
Taunting us with dreams of worlds away
Where lives are untouched, unbroken, and unnoticed
The last remaining mysteries from our eyes
Places hoping never to be discovered
Hoping never to feel a hand constricting the throat
Choking the air of salvation
Moving further and further into the blackness
And losing their way in the dark

We listen to the wind
Whispering sweet nothings in our ears
Running off to places much sweeter
And leaving us prisoners of our own decay

We're kissed by the moonlight
As it illuminates the shadows in which we cower
Lending credence to the spectres
That walk alone upon our murdered planet


"Lilac Perfume"

Your words hang in the air,
Stilted, stifled, stigmata from your mouth,
You claim to preach the gospel,
But only lies flow through your lips

Your words hang in the air,
Little balloons of ego that float in front of your face,
Every lie, every mistake,
They taunt you as they float on the breeze

Your gaze shoots icy knives, trying to wound your words,
Shoot them down from out of the sky before they can be heard,
Before they can reveal the pain from which they were created

Your words hang in the air,
Tethered to your neck, a noose you can't outrun
The shadows don't protect your secrets
They glow like a lantern from within you

Your words hang in the air,
Like the lingering remnants of a lilac perfume,
Sweet on the surface, delicate inside,
And purple like the bruises on your soul

"Acid Rain (The End Of The World)"

The smoke clouds roll in
Casting shadows across the land
The roses lose their fragrance
As they wither into sand
It becomes hard to breathe
As the landscape turns to dust
The beauty turns to sorrow
And we choke on our disgust

- When we're cryin', cryin' at the end of the world -
And we're tryin, tryin' to cross the bridges we've burned
But there's nothing we can say
When the world is crashing down
There's no strings we can pull
To turn time around
When we're dyin', dyin' at the end of the world

The sun begins to fade
As the sky grows dark and thick
The light gets cut to slivers
As smoke rises from the wick
The wax drips off the candle
And ignites a fiery blaze
We watch it fall to ruin
And our tears blur the haze

- Chorus -

The sky opens up
The wound pulled apart by shame
Heaven is crying
And it's pouring acid rain

- Chorus -


"Mourning Dove"

The dreams are not real but they're all that I have
To save myself from tearing my own mind in half
When the one person's gone who could bring me to life
It's a prayer that maybe I won't make it through the night

* But when you said, "all will be well" *
I didn't know you were saying "farewell"

- There's no getting around the fact that you're gone -
When I wake up in mourning and cry up a storm
There's no help getting around the fact that you're gone
When I wake up in mourning and cry up a storm
There's no help...
There's no hope...

The memories are left but they're starting to fade
Everything I held dear disappears by the day
I try to hold on but it's all falling too fast
My prayers aren't answered, they're not taking you last

* Bridge *

- Chorus -

The pictures remain but they don't mean as much
They fade, they tear, and they crack at the touch
I can't hold them close without losing you more
Like your place in my heart, every one is well worn

* Bridge *

- Chorus -

I wrote a duet?
"Where Does Love Go? (When We Throw It Out)"

Not every story has a happy ending
They can't all be black and white
The truth is always ever bending
On the backs of the contrite

And we follow in the footsteps
Of all those that wore the path
By holding back on the truth
In the hope of standing last

I'm stroking your hair, with blood on my hands
It's staining your halo, my conscience be damned
I cannot let go, when you're all that I've got
It may not be love, but it's all I ever want

- So tell me, -
Why do we go on when we lie to ourselves?
Do we need each other so much?
I know my heart beats in lockstep with yours
I used your strength as my crutch

And now you're walking away and you're saying goodbye
You're leaving me behind without a tear in your eye

So tell me,
Where does love go.....
When we throw it out?

Not every lover can last forever
Even if their love will never die
Perfection grates and becomes dull
And sometimes we simply tire

It's by no fault of our own
That we feel a need to move along
But forming the words "it's over"
Will require far too long

I'm not crying at night, with my head on your shoulder
The fires of passion, are struggling just to smolder
But I can't cut you loose, with nothing in reserve
I need to fly freely, but I'm lacking the nerve

- Chorus -

I'm holding your hand, as you're pulling away
I want you to leave, but I need you to stay
I'm closing my eyes, and bowing my head
That look on your face, is what I truly dread

I'm trying to speak, but I push out only air
My screams are whispers, rage comes out like prayers
I'm swallowing my tongue, so I can't choke on tears
And along with my voice, all my pride disappears

- Chorus -

Woo, I'm So Emo
"A Black Rose On Valentine's Day"

Bring me a belief I can treasure
To replace all the thoughts in my head
I've been through them all so often
Even the worst have worn off their tread
You could say that I have a habit
Of twisting everything into a lie
But am I really all that crazy
When you can't look me straight in the eye?

- A black rose on Valentine's Day -
An avatar of emotional decay
A black rose on Valentine's Day
A bitter sentiment on a sweet cliche
A black rose, on a black day

Give me something I can cling to
And maybe I won't curse your name
My sanity is barely tethered
And the rope's held over a flame
You could snuff it out if you just cared
You don't even have to say a word
Just don't act like the words "I love you"
Are the best joke you've ever heard

- Chorus -

I'm not asking for the world
I don't even want you

- Chorus -

Some things are so humiliating that you have to make them public..... or at least preserve them for later torture. This would be one of them.

My friend: i guess
My friend: it was like falling in love with you...except i was attracted to drew...
My friend: sorry that came out bad
Me: thanks a lot
My friend: sorry
My friend: if i was attracted to you i would so date you
My friend: but i think its the whole italian thing....
My friend: i don't like italians

If I've ever thought it was odd that I don't have more self-confidence, this brings me back to reality. It's hard to have any sort of pride when you hear things like this. Hooray for me, it's a great day to die.