October 27, 2006...TIGERS UPSTAGED BY THE ZAMBONI DRIVER?

The Streetsville Tigers ventured into the Gord and Irene Risk Community Centre for the 2nd time this season, a venue best known for the zamboni driver who floods the ice like he was doing a paint by number. There is no doubting the intensity of the driver, who I will call Mr. ZZ (Zig Zag) for the purposes of this article.

As the preceding game came to an end Mr. ZZ could be seen dawning his Walmart work gloves, preparing to do battle with bad bad “Mr. Ice”. As he mounted his “machine of destruction” he pondered the task at hand and after a few primal grunts he turned over the propane driven engine, “IT WAS NOW TIME!!!!”. He adeptly backed the zamboni out of it’s lair and with the precision of a jeweler he rammed the transmission from reverse to turbo drive and proceeded towards his 1st victim, the north net. With the net in his sights he leaned slightly forward and stared it down, forcing the net to cowl and move off it’s underpinnings. The zamboni was now in full engagement with the enemy and with the side brush kicking up the shaven ice, a blanket of fine snow was kicking up, creating a smoke screen, hindering any thoughts of an attack from the rear. As Mr. ZZ turned the behemoth to launch another attack he purposely steered down the ice in a pattern that was at best non-symmetrical, confusing anyone trying to follow his tracks.

“I WILL NOT BE DENIED” shouted Mr. ZZ as he cranked open the floodgates leaving behind a lake of water that only the most sophisticated amphibious vehicles could maneuver. With the smell of victory tickling his nostrils he crossed his trail over and over and over, totally confusing all onlookers, he would not be denied. With his mission completed, Mr. ZZ made one last pass as he drifted the zamboni to its final resting place, dumping some of its byproducts just outside the lair as if to salute all those who were watching in awe. Nice job Mr. ZZ.

Oh yeah the Tigers lost a rather uninspired game 3-1 to the Humber Valley Sharks. A few great individual efforts but they were outplayed for most of the night. Adam Galbraith scored the lone Tigers goal.

When coach Matt was asked how he felt, his response was “@#$!!^...#&(%!!”

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