Haiku
Mood:  celebratory
Now Playing: Remembering Bubba
Topic: Nailed his ass

A titan's demise
His unforeseen legacy
A certain blue dress

A Shakespearean Sonnet
Mood:  suave
Now Playing: A Vulture is Sexier
Topic: Pitching woo
What is it about you that makes me ill?
Your Tammy Faye face, your anchovy breath?
A perfume thay smells like eau de roadkill
Before I'd kiss you, I'd jump to my death!

Fraudulent grace 'neath a Miss Clairoled mop
Wear a sack on your head, for heaven's sake!
All damn day long you're a beer-guzzling sop
Your mug caused dressing room mirrors to break!

All your ex-husbands are six feet beneath
No man will touch you, 'least not one with pride
With your bloodshot eyes and ten missing teeth
Your last husband gladly took cyanide!

Hit the road, sister, you're not worth a dime
Your mere existence is almost a crime!