Chapter 9

Chapter 9


Zac

It was an awkward trip home. Neither of us spoke much being that I really didn’t know what to say and well I knew she was still really mad. I felt weird about even trying to hold her hand, even though, it was killing me to not touch her. “You can touch me you know?” she said crossing her arms and glaring at me.

I moved closer to her slowly, “I didn’t think you would want me to touch you,” I muttered to her.

She just looked at me as I placed my hand on hers. She wasn’t exactly willing to hold my hand, but she also didn’t stop me. It annoyed me she was being like this, but I know I have absolutely no right to say a word to her. I understand how lucky I am that she is still talking to me.

I ran my thumb over her hand and she sighed so loudly it was nearly obnoxious. “Why are you doing that?” she asked me.

“Because I have always done it... you love when I do it,” I smiled cautiously at her, hoping she would crack a smile.

“Yeah, well I’m pissed at you right now!” she threw me, but I could sense a little humor under there.

“I’m so sorry Jo Bear,” I must have told her that sixty times, but I felt the need to say it again.

“Yeah, you told me that already.” she was really snappy.

“I am. I swear, I am.”

She sighed loudly and looked out the subway window, “We really need to talk Zac,” there was urgency in her voice.

“I know we do baby, I know.” “No, Zac, you don’t. You have no idea. There is so many issues right now that we need to settle before we do anything else.” their was desperation in her eyes as she stared into me.

I felt slightly queezy as she bore into me. What if she didn’t want to be with me anymore? What in the world would I do without her? I looked at her with more fear apparent then there should have been, “Joley, I can’t lose you!” I pleaded touching her face.

“Zac,” she whispered, touching the my hand that was placed gently on her skin, “I’m not going anywhere.”

I felt relief run over me so quickly that I couldn’t hold back my smile. “But, if these things keep going like this... I don’t know what might happen. There are a lot of problems Zac and we need to face them.”

I nodded in agreement and took her hand once more as the subway doors opened and we walked out into the chilly New York air.

********
“What the hell happened here?!” she screamed as she walked into our ran sacked apartment.

“Jo Bear, I can explained all of this,” I rubbed my forehead. This was not going to be fun.

“Your damn right your gonna explain it to me. I want answers Zac, to this, to all of this!” she walked over into the broken glass and wood and just pile in the middle of the living room.

“How did this happen?” she bent down and picked up the picture of me and her that Taylor broke.

I felt the heat start again and it took all my strength to repress it. I wasn’t gonna let this ruin me and Joley. “No, not our picture.. Oh my god! I got you this when you left for the This Time Around tour... this was...” she was gonna cry.

I hated making her cry. I walked over to her and took the broken frame from her hands and picked up her face. “Jo Bear, lets talk in the kitchen ok?” I needed to get her out of this mess.

“Ok,” she said still staring at our shattered image.

I took her hand and guide her out of the messy area. She was walking slowly behind me when she suddenly stopped and looked down in the dining room area, “What the hell is that?” she was pointing at the smearing on the floor.

“Joley,” I told her. I didn’t want her to freak out.

She bent down and looked at the floor. She looked at me in disbelief, “That is blood!” she was horrified, “There is a trail of blood, tell me that this isn’t from you guys hitting each other?”

I didn’t have a chance to answer her because she was following the trail of blood. I knew where it lead and I was praying that she didn’t find it. How was I gonna explain it? “Oh my god!” she screamed and I knew she saw it.

I breathed deeply before walking into the bathroom. I was a little taken back by how horrible it looked. “What is this?! What happened?” she wanted answer and I knew that look meant don’t screw around with me.

“I was really messed up last night, ok? I got home and I had some kind of break down and I just... freaked. I came in her and I was upset and I looked at myself in the mirror and I hated what I saw because I was such an ass to you last night that... I punched the glass.” I said quickly trying not to let myself worked up.

“You what!?” she was horrified and her face contorted.

She looked at me and her eyes finally landed on my hand. She came over to me and touched it softly causing the throbbing that had been continuous since I woke up this morning. “It’s fine,” I whispered.

“Zac, oh my god, what? Why? Are you ok?” she was genuinely concerned about me.

“Yeah, it’s throbbing, but it will be ok in a few weeks... they stitched it up when they arrested me last night,” I said with a slight chuckle.

She sighed again and walked out of the bathroom. I knew I shouldn’t have mentioned last night, but I didn’t know what else to say. “Zac, do you see all of this?” she asked running her fingers threw her hair.

“Of course I see it Joley!”

“Well this is what you are becoming. A mess a friggin mess and I can’t keep cleaning it up Zac. I just can’t keep doing it,” she was starting to raise her voice.

“I’m not asking you to do anything for me, Jo Bear. I just need you to be there here for me.”

“And what happens when you lose control of yourself and I’m trying to help and you just push me away. Like the restaurant. I was trying to stop you from doing something stupid and you yelled at me. You got in my face and talked to me like you owned me!” there was heat in her eyes and I knew this was the topic that she was gonna get fired up about.

“I was mad and I just lost control, ok? It’s not right but that’s what happened,” I wish I had a better explanation for her, but it was honesty and that was more important.

“How could you treat me like that?!”

“I didn’t even realize till I said it!”

“I was so hurt and I felt like such a fool!” she was yelling and I deserved it all.

“I know I’m sorry!” I hated hearing about how I made her feel.

“I had to go home with your brother and his girlfriend. Not only was I imposing on their few days they actually get with each other but I was lonely and empty and upset. I cried for an hour when I got home from the police station Zac. I cried myself to sleep! Why because I couldn’t shake the sound of your voice telling me you loved me as I walked away in the jail. And all night I kept feeling so guilty that I left you there and I didn’t tell you that I loved you!” she stopped and wiped her nose that was now running with her tears that I had started again.

“Joley,” I walked towards her and she held her hand up.

“But why the FUCK should I feel guilty when you have no god damn respect for me!”

“Hey, that is not true! Don’t say something like that to me!”

“It is true! If you had a respect for me you would have wondered if I was ok and called me. I could have been dead or raped or whatever, but you didn’t care and then after the fight we had yesterday about you and Taylor, not only do you act like the biggest jackass in the world, but you and your brother got into a fight in our home!” she threw her hands up in the air. “Then where was the phone call, huh? Instead of drinking yourself into oblivion!” she was pointing at me.

“The alcohol makes it all go away, ok? It made me forget everything and that’s what I need, just to be blank,”

“What’s everything Zac? Am I everything, do you want me just to go away because if that’s what you want don’t toy around with me any more. Just tell me and I’ll be on the next plane to Tulsa!” I stopped and stared her in the eyes for a second and I could tell she was not playing around. She really meant every word of that.

“You would really leave, wouldn’t you?” my tone was softer. It was more of a statement then a question.

She took a deep breath, “If that’s what you wanted then, yeah! If it made you happy.”

“I would be lost without you, you know that right?” I was so close to her now I could almost feel her heart beating.

“You’d be ok,” she said barely audible.

“No, I wouldn’t. You make everything in my life a little better. You make me smile when I really need to smile. I have loved you for so long Joley and there still isn’t a day that goes by that you still don’t take my breath away.” I stroked her cheek.

She pushed into it and closed her eyes, “Are you gonna change for me Zac?”

“I’ll do whatever you need from me! This wont happen again. I will never put you in the middle of Taylor and I again, ever.”

“I wipe my hands of this Zac! Your problems with your brother is your problems. I’m not sacrificing us because I try to help,” I nodded. That would be for the best.

“Jo Bear, let’s go lay down and talk. I’ll explain everything, just... just let me hold you?” she smiled half heartedly and the two of us walked slowly into our bedroom.

********
We were laying as close to possible as we talked for what seemed like hours. We both cried, we both listened to each other pore everything out and now, we are just laying in each others arms trying to make each other feel the immense emotions we feel for one another. I was locked deep in her eyes as I stroked her long auburn hair. Her green eyes were blood shot from crying and lack of sleep but she still looked so beautiful to me.

I felt like we were as open with each other as we have ever been. I told her every detail from last night and she told me explicitly how I had made her feel. “I never meant to hurt you Joley,” I said pulling her closer, needing to feel her body more then ever.

“I know that you didn’t Zac. I know you would never hurt me on purpose,” she touched my face with her small, soft hands and smiled so innocently.

I watched the way her face lite up when even a slight smile crossed it. Her eyes sparkled just enough to make my breath catch in my throat. I had to close my eyes to brake away from the intense feeling I was getting in my chest. “You stop my heart sometimes when you smile, you know that?”

She giggled and I could have sworn for just that instant that we were nine and laying underneath the tree in her backyard, “Yeah, sure. You see so many hot girls all the time and your shows and stuff... I’m sure some of them have had nicer smiles then me.” That’s Joley, she never did take compliments well, but I wouldn’t have her any other way.

“Don’t know. When I look at them.. It just makes me want you more. They will never be my Jo Bear.” It wasn’t a lie.

Sure, some of those girls were very pretty actually some of them were gorgeous, but Joley... is Joley, something they could never be, something that they could never replace. “Yeah, I’m sure you have never looked at any of those girls.”

“Not the way I look at you,” I told her in all seriousness.

She wrapped her arms around my neck and embraced me tightly. “You make me feel special, Zac,” she whispered into my ear.

“You are special,” I told her back, rubbing her back and not about to let her go.

She pulled away from me and I couldn’t stop myself from trying to stop her, but she was gone, “I have to go to the bathroom. I’ll be right back.” she scampered away.

She was only gone for a minute or so and on her way back to the bed she stopped and looked in the mirror, “Oh my god! I look horrible!” she turned to me and was laughing, “Why didn’t you tell me that I look like crap?”

“Cause, you don’t. I think you look cute,” she really did look cute.

I loved the way her hair was all over the place and her face was pale and her eyes still told me it was the morning. She was wearing one of Isaac’s T-shirts and a pair of Rachel pants. I could tell they were Rachel’s because they were a little tight on her and they were very long, “Look at this outfit? Oh my god and I was on the subway like this. What the hell was I thinking?” she said, but she was having fun with it and laughing.

“Come lay back down... and maybe... you can get out of those cloths?” I told her resting my head on my hand as I stared at her.

I hadn’t thought about fooling around at all, but as she was standing there and I was looking at how awkward she looked in those cloths, the way her plump little butt was being hugged in those pants I just got all turned on really quickly, “Are you serious?” she giggled and I knew that meant she was thinking about it.

“Yeah... you look so damn cute and I love the way your ass looks in those pants!” I said biting my lip as I moved my head to take a better look.

“Zac!” she said covering it, like I haven’t looked at it a million times.

“Come here,” I whispered changing the sound of my voice.

She stared at me hungrily and she bite her lip as she took the hand that I had held out. I pulled her to me and she followed like a little puppy. When she laid down, practically on top of me, I turned over again and our faces were so close that the tips of our noses were touching.

I leaned in slowly and kissed her softly, tripping her bottom lip between my lips for just an instant. I pulled away slowly and she had her eyes closed and she breathed in heavily, “Why did you stop?” she asked.

“Because,” I brushed the hair away from her neck. I need to taste her sweet skin, “I wanted to do this,” and I brushed the skin with my lips, giving little pecks to every area of skin.

She breath in sharply and she leaned her head to the side allowing me more access. I knew her neck just drove her wild. I moved up slowly to her earlobe and sucked on it just enough to make her whimper, “You like that, sweetheart?” I whispered.

“Yeah,” she said breathlessly.

I stopped abruptly, causing a moan of torment to escape. She didn’t have time to say anything because I place my lips on hers immediately. “Mmm,” she said into me as we kissed deeply.

Her hands were running up and down my back and when my lips sucked on her tongue just slightly, I felt her fingers dig into my back ever so slightly. I was instantly aroused and keep sucking, hoping that she would do it again.

I wanted to feel skin. I wanted her skin on my skin, but I told myself to slow down. We had no rush and I was gonna make this a time to remember. My hands were feeling on her body. I don’t think there was an inch that I didn’t touch. I felt her breasts threw her shirt and raised an eyebrow finally pulling away just enough, “No bra?”

“Don’t ware it when I sleep remember?” she said smiling and going back in for more of my kisses.

Her hands began wondering down my back and she grabbed my butt when she reached it. She forced my body closer to hers and I knew she felt what was straining inside my pants. I moved my lips back to her neck and began kissing and sucking, “Mmm, Zac...” she breathed as her hands wandered a little more over my body.

When she ran her finger tips over the front of my bulging pants, I felt a wave of pleasure wash threw and I felt my body give a instinctive chill, “Liked that, huh?” she teased as she laughed softly, sexily in my ear.

I snapped right then, I don’t know what got into me, but I turned into a lust filled animal and before she could even blink she was on her back and I was straddling her. I knew she could feel me pressing into her and that just made the whole situation even hotter. I kissed her once more, trying to put myself inside her mouth and she wasted no time wrapping her arms around me. Her hands found my hair and she began running her fingers threw it, pulling on it every time I would gyrate my hips just enough for her to feel me.

“Take of your shirt,” she said as she turned her head, wanting me to kiss her neck.

“Take it of for me,” I told her in her ear.

“Yeah...” she said sounding of sex.

Her hands found the seem of my blue long sleeved T-shirt and she yanked it over my head in an instant. Before I could lay back down on top of her, she ran her hands up my chest, squeezing just momentarily at my nipples. Causing the organ in my pants to fill with just a little more blood. “Joley,” I moaned as I kissed her again.

She was pulling on my hair more frequently now and she pulled my hair in such away that I pulled away from her kiss slightly. She bit on my bottom lip for a moment and I couldn’t help but let a deep throated moan leave my lips, “Jesus, baby.”

I wanted her cloths off so bad. I wanted to make her scream in utter ecstacy, but I had to control myself. I was so in that about how much I wanted her at that moment that I hadn’t even realized that I was now on my back and she was on top of me. Her hands were traveling down my chest as her hair hung down.

She brought her soft lips to my neck and bit and kissed it the way she always does, just the way I like it. Her lips then moved down to my collar bone then my chest. I felt her tongue move on to my nipple and I took in a sharp breath. I looked down at her and her eyes were looking up watching me as she brought it gently into her mouth. “Ughhh,” I said as I watched her circle it with her tongue, knowing exactly what she was imitating.

The feeling of her mouth, her lips, her teeth, her hair on my burning skin was enough to make my mind go crazy not to mention what was in my pants. As I continued to watch her, I felt her hands run up my thighs and I held my breath for a moment. I needed her to touch me. I was gonna explode.

Instead of touching me, her hands went right to the buttons on my pants and she slowly undid them. When she unzipped my jeans, she did it so tediously that it felt like an eternity before I felt relief. My pants had been so constricting against my growing member that when the pressure was released it was amazing.

“Take these off...” she said to me as she stared at the completely noticeable bulge.

I lifted up my hips and she had my pants off within seconds leaving me in only my boxers. The thin fabric made my penis look even more engorged then it looked when I was in jeans. Joley reached her hand down and with out any notice to me rub me threw my boxers. Her hand connected with slight skin every once in a while threw the little opening of my undergarment. “Oh god, baby,” I said closing my eyes and enjoying the sensations.

“I want to touch it, Zac...” she said not taking her eyes from that area of my body.

I laughed slightly and was about to signal her to remove my boxers, when I realized that she was fully clothed and well, this was about her not me. I grabbed her hands and when she looked at me confusingly I flipped her as quick as could back on to her back, “Oooo..” she said.

I was straddling her again, “Up,” was all I said.

She didn’t say a word she only lifted her upper body off the bed and lifted her arms. The shirt was off quicker then she could blink. She laid her body back down and I looked down at her alabaster skin. I kissed her stomach without warning and a visible chill ran threw her.

My hands began caressing her exposed breasts and her head tilted back in pleasure as a low growl escaped her gorgeous lips. I squeezed her nipples gently as I continued to kiss her stomach venturing lower and lower. When I got to the waist band of her pants I made eye contact with her and she smiled warmly.

My hand reached down ans spread her legs apart just enough to gain access and I ran my hand over her gently. “Ughhh...” she gasped and I smiled at how wet she felt. I could feel it threw the pants.

I moved back up her body and my lips found there way to her breast and I placed soft kisses on her perfectly molded breasts. They weren’t huge but they weren’t small by any means. I felt like they fit in my hand so precisely that they must have been made for me. As I stimulated her nipples causing her to let out little whimpers, my hand found its way inside her pants.

She opened her legs a little more to give me better access and I began rubbing her clitoris slowly, teasingly already giving her trouble breathing. “This is really hot, huh, Joley?” I had to edge her on just a little.

“Mmmhmm...” she answered as her back was arching under my oral pleasure to her breast, “God,” she continued as she looked down at me nibbling on her, “I love your lips...”

“Really?” I said slyly as I finally pulled off of her upper body, “Well, take these pants off and I will really show what these lips can do.”

She laughed slightly, and let me have full reign to take off her pants as I so pleased. I didn’t waste anytime taking them off and leaving her completely naked in front of me. I couldn’t control myself anymore and I lowered my body between her legs, kissing her thighs teasingly. “Rmm, god...” she moaned knowing how close I was to pleasure.

Joley I hadn’t slept together and we hadn’t for my personal reasons, but we did fool around to the utmost extent and I loved pleasuring her this way. I felt as close to her body as I was ready to be.

My tongue was the first to make contact with her and her whole body shivered, “Ahhh!” she said rather loudly, squeezing her eyes shut.

I teased her in the beginning, running my tongue up and down, back and forth, loving the way her body would twitch when I touched a extremely sensitive spot, “Zac, please stop teasing me...” she said having a hard time getting the small phrase from her lips.

As much as I was enjoy myself, this was about her feeling good and so obliged. My lips encircled her slowly and began a slow gentle sucking on her, “Oh my god,” she said her hands clinching the sheet next to her as I began a real oral attack on her.

It took only a few minutes of me using my lips to bring her to edge, “ZAC!” she yelled as her whole body convulsed with the maximum pleasure, “Oh my.. Oh my... Oh my...!” she breathed as I still couldn’t bring myself to stop.

She reached her hands down and touched my head as soon as she came down from her natural high and tried to push me off of her, “Zac, stop... I can’t take anymore...” but I didn’t listen.

I kept on tasting her, loving her the only way I was ready to but this time my three fingers found their way inside of her and she gasped loudly, “Good god!” and her back arched uncontrollably.

My fingers were going in and out of her and my mouth was continuing it’s services. Within moments I felt her begin to constrict around my fingers and I knew it wouldn’t be long till she came again, “ZAC! ZAC! Oh my GOD!” she screamed.

Her hand reached down and grabbed a hold of my free hand, my injured hand and as she came the second around my fingers, she squeezed down hard on my hand. I felt pain, but I didn’t dare say two words, she was to hot when she was getting off, “Hmm...Hmm.. Hmmm...!” she kept doing over and over and I wouldn’t have been surprised if I came in my pants from how hot it was.

Finally, her body relaxed and I with drew myself from between her legs and kissed my way back up her stomach. She was smiling and her eyes were closed. Her chest was heaving up and down as I laid down next to her. I leaned down and kissed her on the forehead and she finally opened her eyes, “Mmm...” was all she said and I did the only thing I could do, laugh.

I was throbbing in my pants and I looked down just to see what the damage seemed to be and I was completely out of my boxers, which were all wet on the front. She must have followed my eyes, “Oh, baby, that’s hot. It’s just all standing up there for me.” she said as she wrapped her hand around me before I could stop her.

“Joley...” I breathed as I felt the familiar fist wrap around me and begin to move up and down, her thumb brushing my head just the way I liked it.

I tossed my head back. I was so turned on, I knew it wouldn’t take long for me to get off. When I picked my head back up to look into her eyes as her hand brought me to the brink of utter bliss, I noticed she was gonna. Before I even realized what was happening, I felt her tongue connect with my head and my eyes rolled back in my head, “Oh god, Joley,” I said looking at down at her, “You don’t have to do this...”

“I know,” she said as she took all of my head into her mouth, “Oh yeah...” I said as I kept my eyes on her.

She slide her mouth lower and lower every time she moved up and down on my member. She has never been able to take all of me in, but she took as much as she could and used her hand on what she couldn’t and I loved everything about it.

I couldn’t take my eyes off her pretty face or the way her mouth looked wrapped around me and it made my hips push up involuntarily forcing almost all of me in her mouth. She gagged loudly and I found my hand touched her hair like I always do when she does this for me, “I’m sorry...”

She winked and tried to smile the best she could as with herself still around me. As she stared to apply more suction and my hands were tangle up in her hair I felt myself almost there, “Baby, I’m gonna cum...” I told her trying to pull her off of me, but she didn’t move.

She kept going and within seconds my hips pushed up and I felt myself release. I threw my head back and squeezed my eyes shut, “Oh Joley...” I said in a fit of orgasm as I slowly came back down.

After a few more moments she finally pulled off of me and there were absolutely no traces left of what I just released. She came back up to me slowly and I hugged her to me before she had a chance to lay back down, “I love you..” I told her.

“I love you,” she whispered back.

We climbed beneath the covers of our bed and drifted off to sleep in each others arms.

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