Chapter 12



Genna

“Mmm, here comes the yummy peaches,” I told Jason as he stared at the food that I had put on the spoon.

He smiled and laughed at me as I made face once he ate it all up, “Hey morning,” Joley said as she strolled into the kitchen, “And hello to you little boy. You just get cuter and cuter every day,” told him leaning over and talking baby talk.

Jason has always liked Joley. I don’t know if it’s because of the tone of her voice or because she has a sweet face. He was kicking his little legs and thrashing his arms in excitement as she talked to him and I could tell he was trying his hardest to get the sounds out. I just stood back and watched him be happy. These were the moments that made all my troubles seem worth it.

“What? Do you have something to tell me? What is it? Come on tell me, big boy,” we were both a little taken back by the loud squeal he made.

She looked back at me and we both began laughing, “What a set of lungs,” she said turning back to talk to Jason, but he had already lost interest and was busy staring at the slow moving ceiling fan.

“He gets that from his father side that’s for sure,” I joked with her, “Oh, you lost him. No one is as interesting as that fan for some reason,” she laughed and kissed him on the forehead.

“He is just getting so, so cute. I mean I look at him and I just want to eat him up,” she said grabbing a plate from the cabinet and pulling out the toast.

“Thanks,” I told her, “It’s weird though you know, I look at him and I swear I think I’m looking at Taylor.”

“Oh my god, I know. He really is his little clone,” she said laughing.

“Yeah, well my son loves to be loved so maybe I’m lucky and he got my personality,” I stated not realizing how bitter I must have sounded.

She looked at me for a moment and I knew she had picked up on the tone. She cleared her throat and came over and sat down across from me, “So I’m guessing that you and Taylor aren’t a good as everyone is assuming you are?” she asked me sounding cautious.

I took a deep breath before I started talking. I knew once I started on this that I wasn’t gonna be able to bring myself to stop, “No, not at all. I just, I expected to be a lot different. I thought maybe I wouldn’t feel this angry when I came back,” I confided in Joley.

“Well, honestly, I am shocked that you aren’t angrier,” she told me staring at an invisible spot on her mug, “If I had been put threw that then I probably would have never came back.”

I could sense that was hard for her to tell me. Though I’m not sure if it was because of having to admit that she would leave Zac or because she thought I would think she was over stepping her boundaries. “Well, I do still love him, a lot, a whole lot but... I mean we have a child together so some things that I might not be able to move past in other circumstances I’m trying for him. I want to give being a family the best shot I can for Jason,” It was true, every single word I was telling her was exactly how I felt.

“I couldn’t imagine being in a position like that,” No one could imagine it till they were in it.

“It’s not a situation you can till your in it,” Joley nodded and I felt for a while that she had no clue what to say to me.

We stayed silent for a while as I continued feeding Jason, “Taylor does really love you, Genna,” she told me quietly, once again giving me the feeling that she wasn’t sure if she was out stepping her boundaries.

“I know Taylor loves me, believe me I have never question that, but...” I stopped and thought about how to explain this to her, “He does things that make me feel like I’m not that important. He puts himself before me, before Jason and I can’t deal with that. I gave up my life to raise our baby and this whole time I felt like I was the only one who made the sacrifice.” I had felt the anger boil up slowly in my stomach and I know my voice was raising as I continued to talk.

Joley was staring at me nervously almost. I never raise my voice unless I’m in a fight and I never usually fight with anyone. “Do you want this to work, Genna?” she asked.

“Of course we have a son together.”

“No, I mean do you want this to work for you. Do you want to be with Taylor for Taylor and not because he is the father of your child,” I closed my eyes and thought about what she had just asked me.

I had asked myself this question every night since I left this place a few months back and right now as I did every night I would think about Taylor and I would immediately see all the shitty things he had pulled in the past year or so. But they would pass momentarily and then I would remember the way he looks at me. The way he can make me smile just by smiling. The feeling that I felt the first time he touched me, kissed me, made love to me and I know that I’m here as much for myself as I am for Jason, “I love him more then I ever thought I could love and that’s why I’m hurting so bad. I want this to work more than anything else in the world,” I said feeling a few tears slide down my cheeks that I didn’t even know had come to the brims of my eyes.

Joley quickly put everything down and came over pulling me into a tight hug. I hugged her back. “Hey, you’re here and it’s gonna work out. I can feel it. You need to wipe those tears and try to smile more,” she told me wiping away a few of my tears.

I patted her hand, “Thanks Joley, really, you’re such a sweetheart,” I really appreciated everything she was doing.

“I try,” she joked trying to lighten the mood.

I cleared my throat and wiped my face, “So Joley, how’s Zac? Did you ever find out what the whole nightmare was about?” I asked wondering how he’s been since that nightmare the other night.

“All he would tell me was that it was about snakes,” she said giving me a look that told me she didn’t believe a word of what he told her.

“Snakes, he would freak out that much about snakes?”

“Well, I mean ever since he was like ten he has had a crazy weird fear of snakes, but I don’t know, I just know there was more to that dream then he is telling me,” she sounded frustrated.

“Why wouldn’t he tell you?” Zac and her were literally a part of each other and I would think that they know everything about each other.

“There is something he isn’t telling me you know? Like all this shit with him and Taylor that I was telling you about, it’s coming from somewhere and I just know that whatever it is he doesn’t want me to know. It hurts that he isn’t telling me, but I figure one day when he is ready to talk he will,” she said.

I admired her ability to always be patient and understanding, but I’m sure it’s something that is hard for her, “I’m sure he will open up soon,” I assured her the way she tried to assure me.

She smiled, “Yeah, I know he will. But listen to us. We are sitting here in this kitchen talking about depressing stuff. Why don’t you and I go shopping for the stuff we are gonna need to get for our trip and then go out for lunch?” I looked at her and I knew we had to do it.

It had been so long since I was able to go out and enjoy myself, “Yeah I would really like that,” I said. When she walked out of the kitchen I let out a sigh and thought maybe coming back was the right thing to do.


Joley

I laid my head back down as Zac lap as we resumed the DVD of Porky’s we were watching. The movie was kind of boring me to be honest, but Zac and Taylor had wanted to watch it. They always want to watch this friggin movie, so Genna and I didn't really have a choice in the matter.

As they all became engrossed with the picture, I found myself watching Genna and Taylor more then the Television screen. After the conversation her and I had this morning I couldn't help but watch them a little more closely to examine not only his body language toward her, but her body language towards him.

They were sitting next to each other on the other couch. She was sitting close to him but far enough away that not a fraction her skin was touching his body. He would reach over every now and then and try to take her hand and she would move her's away in such a way that he probably wasn't sure if she had done it on purpose of it was a coincidence.

I felt bad for him cause every time she would stop him from touching her he would get that look in his eye. I knew what he was thinking. Taylor was always easy for me to read because as much as neither of them wont admit it, he and Zac are a lot alike. I know he must have thought that once she came back here theat they would pick up where they had left off before the relationship went sour. And now, he is not sure just what exactly to do with her being so cold to him. I understand why exactly he is so upset, but on the same token, I completely see why Genna is doing what she's doing.

I sighed loudly as I tried to break myself away from them. It was none of my business what was going on in there relationship and I need to break away from diving too deep into it. I felt my head being moved as Zac cracked up at some part in the movie that I know he has seen like a zillion times. He flew his hand up and it came down hit me on the head, “Oh baby I’m sorry,” he said looking down at me and laughing.

“Ow,” I whimpered rubbing my head.

“I’m sorry. I really didn’t mean to,” he said rubbing my head and leaning down and kissing it.

“Yeah, yeah. If I wanted to be abused, I would have told you,” I said getting up.

“No, Jo Bear, don’t go,” he said grabbing my arm and pulling me down so unexpectedly that my face fell right into his crotch.

I heard laughter coming from Taylor and Genna and I pulled up really quick, “Jesus,” I stammered.

“Stay down there. It’s hot,” he said.

I gave him a evil look and I got up without a fall this time. I walked in the kitchen to get a drink of water when the door bell rang. I looked at the clock and it was about ten thirty. Who the hell would that be? I walked back out into the living room and thought that maybe someone else had got the door, but no one had really moved, “Oh sure, don’t get up I’ll get it,” I joked looking right at Zac.

“Thanks babe,” he said winking.

Oh, that boy is gonna get it tonight. I opened the door and Isaac was standing there smiling. I know he has been saying that there is nothing different with him, but he seems like he is floating on cloud nine. I know it’s because Rachel is coming home with us, “Hey, Ike,” I said to him as I gestured for him to come into the apartment.

“Hey guys, what’s up?” he said coming into the room and standing in front of the couches blocking the TV.

“You’re blocking the TV, Ike,” Taylor said as he moved his head to see the TV.

“Umm, you have seen this movie like a million times. So,” he said shutting off the TV and making me smile, “So I need to talk to you guys about the trip,” he said and they boys finally stopped and looked up at him.

“Oh, speaking of the trip. I just wanted to let you guys know that we are leaving Monday night at eleven,” he said nonchalantly.

“Eleven?” Taylor asked, “What, did you get us a red eye?”

“No, we aren’t flying,” he said like it was no big deal.

Each one of us almost jumped at him at the same time, “What do you mean we are not flying?” Zac asked stopping in mid bite of eating popcorn.

“Well, I knew someone who got my a great deal on a Rv...” he trailed off looking down at his hands, knowing the reaction he was gonna get.

There was silence in the apartment for a moment or so and then finally Taylor spoke up, obviously trying to remain calm, “Are you telling me that you got us a RV for our transportation back home? Like you, Rachel, Genna, Jason, me, Joley and Zac are gonna be on this moving trailer to go back to Tulsa for Thanksgiving?” his voice was raising and you could tell that Isaac new he did a dumb thing.

“Well, it was a good deal and besides I thought that it was a good way for us to bond,” he said to everyone, flashing the smile that he always does when he wants to try to get himself out of trouble.

“Isaac, don’t you know that RV means ruins vacations?” Zac said to him shaking his head in disbelief.

“Hey, I tried,” he said shrugging his shoulder.

“Well, you are never booking the vacation again!” Taylor said obviously the most annoyed.

“Well, it’s booked there is nothing I can do,” he said trying not to get into it with Taylor.

Before a fight could really break out, I jumped in. “So, when is Rachel coming in?” I asked him.

“Tonight,” he said with a killer smile.

“Really, what time?” I had no idea she was coming tonight especially so late.

“Umm, her train comes in twenty minutes,” he said glancing at his watch.

“Your not going to the train station?” Zac asked shocked. We all knew how Isaac was about her traveling alone.

“Well, she told me not to and I thought I should listen to her this time. I should give her what she wants.”

“Isaac, it’s eleven o’clock at night and you should be there for her and besides, when have you ever listened to her before?” Zac told him and Isaac thought about it for a moment.

“Oh my god, you guys are right. What was I thinking. I have to go, I’m definitely gonna be late!” he said grabbing his coat and leaving as quickly as he came.

I laughed to myself and then began dreading the trip that I was so excited about like three hours ago.



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