The One With My Withheld Payment
Mood:  quizzical
-----Original Message-----
From: hanmohammed@atarde.com.br [mailto: hanmohammed@atarde.com.br]
Sent: 26 June 2006 22:42
To: hanmohammed@atarde.com.br
Subject: The wrongful withholding your overdue payment

Valued Attention.

I resumed duty recently as policy harmonization chairman on public debt (West African Monitoring Institution), a committee set up by the WAMI under the able presidency. I am committed to upholding and defending the constitution and laws of West African Monitoring Institution as well as achieving a higher level of public safety and security through the prosecution of criminals in the state. The purpose of the committee among other is to investigate, verify and settle all outstanding debts owed and Records before me have revealed that your payment has not been effected as a result of official negligence as many abnormalities had happened in the institutions where some top official of the apex Banks collaborate with impostors who are carrying a fake portfolios with levies misled and misguided about the position of your fund and having the opportunity to extort money from you that made it too longer up till date .

As we understand the difficulties of economic time that exist today and would like to repay this obligation for your plan designed to meet your budgetary need. so be inform that your payment has since being deposited with out (OFF-SHORE PAYMENT CENTRE)AFFILIATED TO WORLD ASSOCIATIONS OF DEBT. MANAGEMENT OFFICES (WADMO)FINANCE HOUSE, USA which in few days, all payment transaction will be concluding according to the agreement and you will receive your payment through a cashier cheque or by wire transfer to your nominated bank account from our consolidated dollars account we have in USA. Base on the information we received, it is mandatory and compulsory that you contact our loot office in republic of Benin send $130 for your NON IMMIGRANT TRANSIT TAX the contact person is Gen .Kozuku Koffi email : genkozuku@pochta.ru forward to him your contact address and telephone for further advice on how you will get the money across to him for the programming of the information in the micro chip compartment of central computer for the fund to be made available to you any way you wish to receive it.

Considering the circumstances at hand, you are advice not to accept any E-mail telephone calls that does not come from this office this is to forestall new effort towards a diversion of your payment. Accept our congratulations in advance. Best regards,

Han MOHAMMED

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Dear Mr Mohammed & Gen. Kozuku Koffi,

Many thanks for your email which I read carefully and with great interest. I must admit, at first it made about as much sense as that Dale Winton marrying Nell McAndrew but soon I began to think you are right. Of course I have an oustanding debt in West Africa, how silly of me not to realise that my payment has not been effected, as you say.

I am clearly owed lots of money and it is very good of you to be working to recover it all for me! Congratulations on resuming your duty as Policy Harmonization Chairman - a hell of a job title, well done. Why are you "resuming" it, have you been between jobs before returning to what you love? I cannot believe the cheek of those negligent officials of which you speak, collaborating with imposters indeed! I can assure you, that is something I will never do as long as my name is J L Stugudforu and I applaud you for being so noble as to work against such corruption in your country.

And so to the matter in hand and the cash in hand. Well, I doubt it will be cash in hand, will it? You say cashier cheque or by wire transfer but then later say that the "micro chip compartment of central computer for the fund to be made available to you any way you wish to receive it." I'll have it in used notes then please. Those microchip compartments are really clever aren't they?! Much better than their overrated rivals, the hardrive compartment, eh?!

And exactly how much money have I now accumulated in owings to me? I expect interest has been taken into account, or I will be displeased. I'm puzzled that the money has been transfered from West Africa to USA though, given that I live in Northern Ireland as you well know. That transfer must have been at a cost to someone - I hope it won't be me.

I notice that you require $130 from me first - again, I clearly don't deal in dollars being Northern Irish but do feel free to let me know the figure in Euros and I will be delighted to oblige you at the earliest opportunity.

I must admit to being a little concerned to hear that I may receive telephone calls and emails from people trying to forestall my payment - clearly there are some bad people involved in this whole thing and I would like to avoid them all. What if they pretend to be from your office? They might be pretending to be nice and trying to help me, all the while looking to rob me of my well-earned money! Don't you just hate people like that? Well, sorry, of course you do, that is why you are in the job that you are and are doing this for me. I am confident that with your help and trust, we can bring this deal to a satisfactory conclusion.

My thanks and heart goes out to you.

Yours sincerely,

J L Stugudforu.
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genkozuku@pochta.ru to me
More options 22:16 (17 minutes ago)

Dear Stugudforu ,

As the way your payment procedure was being handled in an unusual pattern, which gave the avenue for fallacies and bogus promises which are totally impossible in any part of the world, all these contributed to make it impossible for you to receive your fund so note that every thing has been resolved through a normal process and you will receive this payment as soon as you send the requested fee.

I am delighted to bring to your notice that that Our duty is to verify and pay off this long waiting transfer with maximum security so be inform that we have received a confirmation advice transfer memo from our payment office bank of America requesting for your Non Immigrant transit clearance tax certificate .
I must draw your attention to the prerequisite for the issuance of aforementioned document as stipulated in section 2(IV) of the procedural manual of the contract Agreement which is regulating this transfer. The agreement made it mandatory that you will pay Euros 115 for the programming of the information to enable us automated the information on the transfer script text which will comply with their transfer desk officer to effect the transfer of the fund exactly on the particular date or period (24 hours) specified as required on the "mandate instant" of the transfer for your fund to be made available to you.
You are advice to send the sum of Euros 115 via western union money transfer with this name
Mr. MAGADJI PINDIGA
DESTINATION COUNTRY ....................BENIN
CITY/ STATE.........................................................COTONOU
ZIP CODE .................................................22997
QUESTION..................! ..................WAMI
AND ANSWER.............................WAMI
SEND THE MONEY TRANSFER COUNTROL NUMBER MTCN......................
SENDRES NAME..............

as soon as you send the money please forward to us You’re direct telephone and contact address where to post the cheque if you preferred to receive this payment through cashier cheque which will be issues in your name and send to your address from our paying office BANK OF AMERICA and you will tender it to any bank around you as the liquid cash will be given to you the same day you tender it, But if you wish your fund will be send direct to your bank account , be kind to give us your bank details upon confirm the fee from you today and the information your fund will hit your account/position within 72 banking hours .
finally note that we have a specific time to transfer your fund and you have to know that this is the final stage and the most important and most fragile stage of this transaction the official deadline is due to expire with the application law so you have to act fast to avoid any further delays that may be detrimental to the whole process.

I will be waiting your gently reply and the payment information.
Any delay from you this payment exercise will be resolved next quarter payment that will be coming next September
Yours truly,
Gen .K. Kozuku
Congratulation!!
NB please be well known that your funds has been "legally bonded and insured'', so because of this insurance policy the bank or any of our officials have no legal authority to deduct or add to the value of your funds.I will advice you to stop communication any body regarding this payment both your local representative and other until you received this payment

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Dear Gen. Koffi Kozuku,

Thanks for your quick reply. I am honoured that you are giving me such quick and specific attention. Your typing speed must be the speed of light, so quick was your response. You are a very clever General. I presume that's what Gen stands for? What are you a General of? The army? Or are you more like General Lee off of that there Dukes of Hazzard? Either way, you must be very talented to split your vocational attentions so dutifully.

How well does Han Mohammed know you, Gen. Koffi Kozuku? You'd best have a word with the lad, because in his initial communication with me, he said your name was Gen. Kozuku Koffi! That's a bit careless, thinking your first name is your second and vice versa, wouldn't you say?! Haha, I do hope he isn't quite so careless with my money! You say there's now a 3rd person involved, MR MAGADJI PINDIGA? I hope that's right! Weird though as Han Mohammed or Mohammed Han said that you were dealing with my payment.

Anyway, great news regarding that 115 Euros that I owe you, I've had an idea. Either deduct it from the money you're sending to me, or send me my money first and then I will pay you out of that! Genius, eh? That'll save us all some time and bother, what do you reckon Big Gen? By the way, you still haven't told me how much money you are sending to me. I'm pretty sure I asked you in the last email that you so diligently replied to. If you're only sending me 100 Euros, that would make all this a bit of a scam, wouldn't it! Haha, imagine that!

Anyway, trusting I'm in good hands, I look forward to hearing from you, kind Sir. Betchya can't reply as quickly again this time!... GO!

J L Stugudforu