Chapter 2 Pajamas and Peanutbutter, Woot
Night soon came with a knock on the apartment door. Yosuke opened the door in a black suit and a sparkly, ruby tie. Osamu and Eito stared at him as they walked into the living room with casual clothes. Osamu carried four large, brown suitcases and Eito carried a bag of video games.
Osamu broke the silence, "Dude, where are you going? You have a date with a chick?"
"No way, man! I'm a hundred percent devoted to Suki...who just happens to live far away," Yosuke exclaimed, taking offense.
Osamu rolled his eyes, "Then where are you going?"
Yosuke groaned, "To my five year high school reunion."
"Five years? I thought it went by tens..." Eito stated very confused.
Yosuke shrugged as he glided out the door. Osamu dropped his suitcases as Eito set up the video games. Tsutomu sighed as he walked out of the bathroom.
Eito laughed, "I didn't know going to the bathroom was so depressing!"
Tsutomu chuckled, "I wasn't going. I was on the phone with my girlfriend and the bathroom was the only private place at the time. I had to spend several hours apologizing and explaining the situation. It ended with me asking her out to an expensive resturaunt."
Osamu started unpacking, "Some advice: bribe her with an expensive gift. Some crazy ones hold grudges. Women...you can't live with 'em, you can't live without 'em."
Eito corrected him, "Actually, it's you can live with 'em, but you don't know how to."
Tsutomu was alarmed at once, "Darth Sidious, what are you doing!?"
Osamu stated casually, "First of all, Darth Vader is my nickname. Second of all, I got kicked out of my house and I need a place to stay. Congrats! I chose this place!"
"Swell," Tsutomu finished with a smirk.
"Oh, gross man!" Eito yelled, "There's peanutbutter all over this controller and the gamecube!"
Osamu started laughing really hard, "April Fools!"
"Dude, it's December," Tsutomu stated confused.
"Umm...so?" Osamu exclaimed, still laughing.
After several hours of SoulCalibur2 and MarioKart, Osamu passed out. Eito poked him, while Tsutomu turned off the video games. Tsutomu walked towards his bedroom door.
"Are we just going to leave Osa here?" Eito poked Osamu again, "I wonder how it feels to wake up with your day clothes still on. I always wear pajama bottoms and a t-shirt. Sometimes I forget the shirt."
Tsutomu yawned, "We'll leave him there. You can spend the night. By the way, pajamas are overrated. I just wear my boxers. Night, Bruce Lee."
Eito stared, "Gross, man!...Night Moneymaker."

Chapter 1
Topic: Boxers n' Bums, Dude
In the morning of December twentieth, a large apartment off a busy steet was demolished by creatures known as "males". Tsutomu, the semi-rich owner of the apartment, housed two other men in the vast space. Which, as you can predict, caused some minor difficulties.
"Where are my boxers!?" Yosuke, another occupant, shouted across the room while wearing only a towel.
"Your freakin' boxers are scattered everywhere! Pick one!" Tsutomu shouted back while kicking Katsunori to wake up from his slumber, "Wake up ya lazy bum!"
Katsunori mumbled, "I work during the night...let me sleep."
Tsutomu knelt down and shouted in Katsunori's ear, "I know that, but you have a doctor's appointment! Dude, I feel like a father to you punks!"
Katsunori jumped a mile high. His shock wore off as he rubbed his sapphire blue eyes and messed with his dark brownish, blonde hair. Katsunori looked around to find shiny boxers hanging on chairs, left-over pizza upside down on the couch, and Tsutomu glaring at him. He disregarded the mess and dragged himself to the shower.
Yosuke became frustrated, "All these boxers are dirty. I always have excellent hygiene! I'm not wearing those, dude!"
Tsutomu glanced at his calender. His eyes grew wide as he remembered his busy schedule and hectic deadlines. Tsutomu scurried to the computer, but freaked out when he spotted something covering the screen.
He slowly stated, "Yosuke...I...found....some...clean...boxers...."
Yosuke smiled as he grabbed his heart covered boxers and glided towards bathroom number 2. Tsutomu turned on the boxer-free monitor and started to work on his programs. Then the phone started to ring as Yosuke rushed out the door, slamming it behind him.
"Kat, get the phone. I'm busy with work," Tsutomu commanded while staring at the monitor.
The shirtless Katsunori picked up the phone, "Hello?...yeah...late," He hung up the phone,"Reiji is coming over tomorrow to talk to you about an apprentice job for programming." Just as Katsunori tried to walk away, the phone rang again. "Hello?....yeah...no...okay...late," He hung up the phone again, "Osamu is coming over tonight to play video games and Eito's coming with him." The phone's sharp ring arrived yet again. "Hello?...Ah, awesome! Is she cute? Dude, that's so cool, man! All right....late," Katsunori hung up the phone again, "Atsuo got me a date this Saturday!"
Tsutomu became irritated, "Take the phone off the hook!"
The phone started to ring again, but Katsunori disconnected it. After awhile of peace, he remembered something important.
"Ummm...Tsutomu?" Katsunori started meekly.
"What is it, Kat?" Tsutomu continued working.
"Tsut, I just remembered that your girlfriend was supposed to call at the exact same time as I unhooked the phone," Katsunori finished with a face of pity for Tsutomu, for he knew how crazy women can get when they're angered.

Topic: Special Thanks
I would like to thank 1. God for giving me the motivation to write, 2. My brother for the guy language, 3. My other brother for romantic stuff, 4. My guy friends Spiral, JaxyChan, Lumi, J102Y, Kasumi (my boyfriend <3), SuppaWakka, and RavenXtreme for getting interviewed and helping me create the characters. Thank you. Love ya all! ^^

Topic: About the Author (ME)
My name is Kuniko! (Not really, but you will call me that!) I've been studying guys for a few years now. I've studied their emotions, habits, defects, actions, and ways of life. Nothing personal is in my story, but I thought it to be a grand idea to write a story about the odd male species. I also have two brothers so it helps to create the story. There isn't much I feel like saying about myself since, if I directed you to this site, you already know me. Woot!

Topic: About Masculine Mayhem
Thanks to the males I have known over the years, I have been inspired to create this story. Masculine Mayhem is about 7 guys who deal with different situations together. They all live together in one apartment and, with their different personalities, it is quite difficult. Together, they must help each other on work, conflicts, and....GIRLS! Yes girls, through this story you will hopefully find out more about the male species and how they think (yes, they do think). I hope some guys read my story too, for they can find out how I see them. Now, don't get me wrong. Guys are cool and I appreciate them. I wouldn't make a story about it if I did. The story is rated Teen for violence and blood content. WARNING: If you are the "Girl Power" type of girl, I wouldn't recommend you to read this. I'm trying to make this realistic through a guy's eyes (although I'm a girl) so there will be some guy language (not bad guy language, but maybe something that would seem offensive). Also, there will be some slang in the speech. So, read at your own risk. I'm a girl so I wouldn't write anything found offensive to me. Hope ya enjoy!