THE FOURTH ANNUAL SHARP STICK IN THE EYE WORLD CHAMPIONSHIPS!
WELCOME TO THE FOURTH ANNUAL SHARP STICK IN THE EYE WORLD CHAMPIONSHIPS! WE DIDN'T HOLD A SECOND OR THIRD ANNUAL SHARP STICK IN THE EYE WORLD CHAMPIONSHIPS, BECAUSE WE WERE TOO BUSY PICKING OUR NOSES. BUT WE DECIDED TO PUT ASIDE PICKING OUR NOSES THIS YEAR TO HOLD THE FOURTH ANNUAL SHARP STICK IN THE EYE WORLD CHAMPIONSHIPS! AS YOU KNOW, SHARP STICK IN THE EYE IS THE WORLD'S FASTEST GROWING SPORTS SENSATION. THE 16 PARTICIPANTS FROM THE FIRST ANNUAL SHARP STICK IN THE EYE WORLD CHAMPIONSHIPS RETURN, PLUS 16 BRAND NEW PARTICIPANTS. SO, OVER THE NEXT 5 WEEKS, THE 32 PARTICIPANTS WILL DUKE OUT TO SEE WHO IS THE BEST SHARP STICK IN THE EYER. THE TOP 3 FINISHERS WILL RECEIVE PRIZES, BUT THEY WILL BE A BIT DIFFERENT THAN THE FIRST TIME AROUND. LAST TIME, THE FIRST PLACE WINNER WON THE PLUTONIUM MEDAL, THE SECOND PLACE FINISHER WON THE PETRIFIED WOOD MEDAL, AND THE THIRD PLACE WINNER WON THE TUPPERWARE MEDAL. THIS TIME AROUND, THE FIRST PLACE WINNER WILL RECEIVE A BAG OF CHICKEN BEAKS FROM ATTILA'S CHICKEN BEAKS, THE SECOND PLACE WIMMER WILL RECEIVE A BAG OF DIRT, AND THE THIRD PLACE WINNER WILL RECEIVE SOME DEHYDRATED WATER! OH JOY! SO, ENOUGH INTRODUCTION! LET'S SEE SOME SHARP STICKS IN SOME EYES!
