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Bio
Josh-FAQ
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Q: What
did you do after the Spurs won their third title?
A: I ran outside jumped over the railing on my front
porch, ran down to my dog Joker (who happens to be a huge Spurs
fan) gave him a huge, celebrated with him a bit, then ran back
inside to watch the trophy presentation.
Q: Why do
you like Wild Boyz better than Viva La Bam?
A: Viva La Bam is way too scripted. Its more of a sitcom
than anything else. Bam's a poser and his mom can't act worth a
shit. Bam just wants everyone to think he's such a bad ass. And
he'll do what he wants unless MTV tells him otherwise. Don't
believe me? watch the top ten Bam slams special on MTV. Plus Wild
Boyz is way funnier that VLB. Pontius and Steve-O are the only
ex-jackasses that should have their own show.
Q: How
can you be so God damn sure that there is no damn God?
A: Its just a simple series of questions. First, what
created the computer you're using right now? Probably made in
some factory in japan right? How was that factory made? Probably
by a bunch of construction machines. And those construction
machines were made by people. And who made people? The bible says
the Almighty God, even almighty is a terrible way to describe
God, created people. Ok, but, who created God? Can't answer that
can you? There needs to be humans to make machines, there needs
to be God to make humans, so, how was god created. A lot of
people get stuck on that question and a stuttering 'Well, he's
just, ya know, there' is their answer right before running away.
But if thats the case, if something so complex and powerful as
God was just 'there' couldn't that mean that people, who are much
simpler and weaker, were just 'there' with out a God?
Q: Yea,
but... He's Almighty
A: He's not almighty at all. Almighty, like the tagline
they give God in the bible, means all powerful, that he can do
everything humans can do, all they can't do, and all they could
only wish to do. But, cliche as it is now, can god make an object
so heavy that he can't lift it? Can he build a wall he can't tear
down? He can't. But can a person make something heavier than they
can lift? Yep. Who ever built this house I'm in right now can't
lift it. I mean I'm sure he's a rough and tough fellow, but
c'mon, its a house. Can someone build a wall they can't tear down
with the same tools they built it with? Yep. So if a human can do
it, why can't God? Almighty means top of the ladder, nothing is
more mighty or even equal to almighty. So how can something
Almighty make something that can do things the Almighty one
cannot?
Q: I'm
almost afraid to ask, what about Fate?
A: I don't believe in it. Because fate is the biggest
reason not to believe in yourself. If you think everything is all
planned out in your life, you're not gonna go out of your way
just to get what you want because you think 'Hey, its fate, no
matter what I do, if i was meant to be a millionaire, I'll be one
sooner or later.
Q: Whats
with those haggard ass jeans you always wear?
A: I know, they're as haggard as all hell. I can't get
rid of them though. I look too good in them.
Q: How do
you kiss loverboy?
A: I tend to keep my eyes slightly open when I kiss. An
ex used to do that, it would freak me out but its something I've
adopted and adapted. Other than that I tend to go for a series of
long passionate kisses and aim for her top lip.
Q: Whats
with all the writing you do?
A: Its a way to vent all my emotions that I'm too
frightened to talk with a friend about. Or that I think none of
my friends would care about and think its just whining.
Q: Boo
Hoo! Cry me a river... No I'm interested, really. Go on.
A: And its a way to live out love fantasies which at
times I don't think I'll ever be in. And to tell a story as well.
Plus my 300+ songs will help me out when I'm a frickin rock star.
Q: What
impressions can you do?
A: I do a pretty good Milton from office space. Craig
from Reno 911 is one of my better ones. I can ape Mitch Hedberg
pretty good too. But most of my impressions are voices and
charactors I thought of myself. Oh, and Lemmy from Motorhead.
Driiiii da dri eeeh.