"But Dad, I like making potions!" -- Deri
"No! Don't show my boyfriend your underwear! I hate you!" -- Amy
"I think home is just wherever I happen to be sleeping at the moment." -- Amy
"It's not because i'm pathetic, but it's because i love him, and being apart from him is silly and a waste of time." -- Amy on missing Patrick
"Yay! No reproducing for Emily or Catherine!" -- Emily
"Thats all you can do......work it out, and when you get to the end of it, you'll discover that you've got a grip onyourself, others, and life...and you'll be set.....for: well, for ever." -- Matt Saunders
"I put on a fucking bra and wear it the whole goddamn day even though the only person who sees me is myself." -- Amy
"I think you can find yourself with someone else." -- Amy
"Have you found your birthday cards?" -- mysterious question from mother
"Are you spoon shaped like me and Vicki? Or are you the cone, or hourglass? Or ruler?" -- another mysterious question from mother
"Off to strip some more!" -- v. disturbing comment by mother
"I'll just kill two birds with two stones then!" -- Jen
"Yeah so um back to the gay sex..." -- Jen
"That ultimate certainty of who I am and what it means...that is love." -- Amy
"Ummm...i ate your present. Can i give it to you tomorrow?" -- Emily
"Why can't she be normal and go out on a Friday night?" -- Jon (Emily's)
"One day you will have your own tv to watch! But until that day comes.. it will sit in the corner of my room." -- Prophetic statement by John (Amy's)
"When I get home you must try my roller shoes." -- Emily
Hate work, Damn school, Like shoes with wheels on them." -- Emily
"I don't want your fucking cheesesticks." -- Jen
"Right now I'm wearing a silk pajama shirt, velvet pants, and eating a half-melted ice cream bar that looked much more appealing on the package. And it feels like home." -- Amy back at school (yay!)
"Hello, my name is Jordan, and I can't control my penis." -- Jordan
"It's the American way." -- Jenn(y? i? _? I forget) on illegitemacy (yeah I can't spell it either) in our society today
"I am anti-abortion because it means more illegal-immigrant farmworkers for my plantation." -- Vicki mimicking George Bush
"It's 6:25 and I'm up." -- Note on door from Emily
"Its 11:35 and I've still done nothing." -- second note on door from Emily
"I just named your pant string." -- Jen
"Personally i think he faked it and is now Val Kilmer but then again i've never been to Paris." -- Matt Levy on Jim Morrison's death
"Everything works out perfectly in the end. No matter what." -- Jordan
"Dude, your dorm's on fire!" -- Some guy
"Mutate, damn you!" -- Amanda and me in science lab
"The maid is cleaning the puke off the toilet in the bathroom! yay the maid! (damn, i wish i knew her name...)" -- Amy
"i think i really do just want to bang on the drums all day." -- Amy
"I was salivating through almost the entire thing." -- Kelly's movie review of "The Count of Monte Cristo"
"I HATE people who try to be inspirational in their online profile. And here's why: Look at us. We belong to the richest, fattest and laziest country on earth. Demands at school, work and home are high, rendering time limited and valuable. And WE choose to spend it on AIM. Anyone that can demand that the rest of us "live life to the fullest" via AIM is ridiculous. The age of living has died, we are in an age where people watch TV, talk online more than they do in person and are generally mean spirited. Don't try to inspire the uninspirable...we're a lost cause. VIVA AIM!" -- Inspiring (?) rant on Emily's profile. Isn't January great?
"This is a baroque sonata. It was originally written for double bass and shiny guitar." -- Edgar Meyer
"I want to eat something phallic today." -- Jordan
"This is 'Prelude to a Polka,' the polka of which I have not yet written." -- Jordan (von Beethoven)
"WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO." -- Message from Neil, supposedly something to do with the superbowl.
"So, did you riot last night?" -- Question of the day
"i think love encourages laziness. or else social isolation." -- Amy
"Tao is great, and Heaven, and earth, and humans." -- from the Tao Te Ching
"He who makes thought his business, he may go far in it, but he has bartered the solid earth for the water all the same, and one day he will drown." -- Siddhartha by Herman Hesse
"I would say as an expat that he is more likely to be so depressed having to live with the American attitude and sense of humour." -- Pro-British propaganda article (?) - see below
"i feel like i have to be this wonderful supportive girlfriend type person but i am just too tired and i don't know how/" -- Amy
"I just remembered we're doing the electric slide tonight! You don't need a partner for that! OK I am excited now." -- Amy
"between cool and cold/take me to the pretty things/thrift store CVS" -- CVS haiky by Jordan
"Catherine, I'm having trouble naming this group. Could you grow a penis so this can be a guy's night out?" -- Kyle
"I don't think you're supposed to feed acid to babies." -- Jordan
"Damn vagina." -- Eric
"go shower and i will tell you about yeast infections." -- Amy
"No one can predict where the jumping gene will jump to." -- Professor Patt
"However many problems they cause, men actually are worth it." -- Narrator on biology video
"Yeah, uh, whose credit card is this?" -- Guy in flower shop
"Can I have a Wawa?" -- Rou
"i miss having you to take my interesting arty pictures of." -- Kelly
"my feet hurt too much to im your boyfriend." -- Amy
"I only cheer for the US and America." -- Jen
"Hadn't we all as connoisseurs and critics in our youth been consumed with love for works of art and for artists that today we regarded with doubt and dismay?" -- Hermann Hesse, Steppenwolf
"Ah, we can iron naked." -- Jordan
"Music is its own reward." -- Sting
"Someday, Kansas will happen." -- Amy
"How can getting drunk and having lots of sex not be fun?" -- Matt Saunders
"Your eyes...they could be a Snood background." -- Jordan
"Sex is the underlying motivation in this relationship." -- Jordan
"No, no don't put that on your website, I didn't mean that, damn you..." -- Jordan five seconds later
"You get away when you can..." -- guy in ski lift last weekend
"It is not good to eat brothers and sisters." -- Professor Wartenkin
"The bourgeois of today burns as heretics and hangs as criminals those to whom he erects monuments tomorrow." -- Hermann Hesse, Steppenwolf
"How can you say you've taken any trouble to live when you won't even dance?" -- Steppenwolf
"to catherino and laurelle: break out the prepackaged parking lot dance party.. im coming!!!!!!!" -- Ashli's away message
"I don't like that one." -- Jen, playing the E string on my violin
"Uh, ok, let me just change my G string." -- Me (do you know HOW MANY TIMES this quote has been stated, all over the world, by violin/viola players? A LOT.)
"Get out your phone book. We're going shopping for vibrators!" - Amy on weekend plans
"Yeah so I'm all like, flamingly gay renaissance..." -- Jordan
"Neil and mr. g thought i should have attacked her in the bathroom when i saw her, but that would have messed up all the make-up she was putting on."-- Kelly on Pat Burrell's breast implanted girlfriend
"I got sun poisoning. it hurts." -- Further comments from Kelly
"They won't let them through the door because their kids are cute. I think that's kidna fascist." -- Me
"I don't think it's a vacation unless you have fudge." -- Me
"Jordan, no eating people at the table." -- Skip
"I wish I had eaten something foul for dinner so I could throw it up." -- Amy
"I can get away with a lot being British." -- Me
"Okay, you're in the penis bubble." -- Jordan
"My coat smells like that crap that was under your bed!" -- Amy
"No, I'm just meant to be a good person." -- Luci
"Yeah life." -- Emily
"I stalk girls." -- Emily
"Ohhh, removing a chunk..." -- Prof. Patt
"What a cool liar you are, Melly." -- Scarlett O'Hara
"So get out your tea and crumpets, avoid the mad cow beef for a British invasion weekend! Good dental hygeine not required." -- Highly offensive statement on asshole patriotic radio station, ZLX.
"Yeah double standards on exhaling while kissing." -- emily
"Please move into the cah if you want your limbs to stay on this train." -- T Driver
"I think that all this "religion" stuff is a pain." -- Kelly
"I lost my faith reading the Bible." -- some girl in my English class
"It's just like your ear, except..." -- Erin "Except...not!" -- Emily
"You were the scariest fetus, Emily!" -- Erin
"Dumb gorgeous people should not be allowed to use literature when competing in the pick-up pool. its like bald people wearing hats!! its deceiving..." -- From Jeff's profile
"Humans have 150,000 cones per square millimeter, but hawks, eagles, and other birds of prey have more than one million cones per millimeter, providing them with much greater visual clarity and enabling them to spot prey fro mgreat heights." -- my science textbook
"You forgot a part to your away message...not only do [the yankees] suck, but jeter swallows." -- Amy Lieb
"I mean, it's ok when a human steps on my feet, but if a cyborg were to step on my foot...well that would suck!" -- some guy in science class
"hey, vagina smells good! it smells like....vagina. and that is reassuring." -- Amy
"every day in this country we eat 18 acres of pizza." -- Amy, everlasting store of knowledge
"You don't have godparents? Who sends you a $50 for your birthday?" -- Jen
"Minella's is depressing cos people you know show up there." -- Amy
Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Let the day's own trouble be sufficient for the day. Matthew 6:34
"What I learned tonight:1. Babies make funny noises2. When a Chamber Chorus is singing, they are probably singing actual words3. "Green Broom" is mad funny4. Taping interviews on other people's minidisk players is fun5. I spent WAY too much time in church as a child because I knew ALL the latin in Requium6. People are so rude that they can't hold in a cough for 3 seconds7. The T ride seems so much longer when being assaulted by the backpack of a young man8. It is impossible to ignore your roommate when she is hobbling down the walkway on crutches9. The Trinity church doesn't house a real religion10. The organ part can make or break a song." -- Emily
"I'm so fay...there's a little bit of fay in all of us you know." -- Jeff
"Yesterday I wanted to kill Billy Blanks. But I guess that's pretty common." -- Amy
"You were totally asking for it." -- Jordan, on my concussion
"hm. i never masturbated before patrick. so blah." -- Amy
"...with a big arc for the genitals!" -- Patt
"...and chapter one is going to be leprechauns!" -- Patt
"Finance is a good major. but what does it have to do with videos about half naked chicks?" -- Amy
"Dude. wouldn't it be so cool if it actually WAS raining men?" -- Amy
"That's enough Jordan." -- Jordan in the Jordan paradox
"Eee! Whoa! I'm in the groove!" -- Me rollerblading like an ass
"If I liked girls, I would like you. I'm sorry I didn't." -- Eric
"If someone walked up to me and said "Who's your favorite bum?" I would give him a quarter!" -- Jane
"come, dahling, surround yourself with the gay men." -- Jeff's enticement for me to walk in the NYC AIDS walk
"This morning I burped AND farted AT THE SAME TIME." -- An email from Jordan
"Hmmm... Random people just came in, used our bathroom, and ate my muffins." -- Jane's away message
"I signed something to say I wanted chickens to run free, and they gave me a free cheesestick! ...It was an organic cheesestick." -- Becky
"It looks much better when it's just a thin fuzz layer." -- Jordan
"She's British. I'm Irish. We don't French." -- Emily
"i still feel bad, will practice on popsicles, etc." -- Amy
"They're all potheads here. and yeah dan's a pothead, but he's a special pothead." -- Adrien
"Feminism isn't about not shaving your legs and not dating men" -- Amy
"I remember very little of what I learned in high school, but I am not stupid." -- Amy
"That's for kicking me in the balls." -- Jordan
"I am uncomfortable with myself." -- Emily
"But she's her - so I'd get mad Catherine disease." -- Jordan F
"Don't take her to Amish country, Catherine, she'll fuck it up." -- Jordan F on Emily coming to PA
"I'm just a total distraction to myself." -- Jen
"I guess he's never going to leave the Stoga parking lot." -- Jane
"dont be depressed. soon you shall be in beautiful paola, surrounded by people who wear plaid and speak only in euphemisms. and you shall be their glorious queen!" -- Ashli
"MIT men: the odds are good, but the goods are odd." -- Courtney Gomez via Kristen Brown
"if yahoo were a person i would marry it " -- emily
"So the truth was that Mulder was gay?" -- Adrien's Mom
"I'm sorry, but it's bad enough doing it for a part of my life..." -- Kelly on celibacy
"It's such an abnormal thing to vote for both your parents on the same day!" -- Kelly
"I don't have to be drunk for Catherine Harris." --Jeff, via Jane's away message
"If I don't have friends, I need to have an oven." -- Jane
"People should stop sucking. It's kinda gross." -- Ashli
"Be strong green card girl, be strong. I believe in you!" -- Emily
"I haven't gone back and forth since I was in like second grade..." -- Kel
"There was a glimmer of hope in my life while he was gay." -- Kel
"He touched me; he didn't sign me." -- Kel
"I had her toilet paper!" -- Pat
"We're gonna have a chill time....no stress, no nothing cept fun." -- Jen on next semester
"Can't wait to meet infamous gay this one and gay that one..." -- Emily on impending visit.
"BC is catholic and BU is jewish -- and after that relig course i took -- the jews have got it down." -- Emily
"Yeah my hair is pretty but not THAT pretty." -- Jeff
"Better to figure it all out now while you're just chillin with rich mommies buying their babies clothing." -- Emily
"Well, technically I'm a straight woman too." -- Jeff
"I wish I was British!" -- Matt Levy
"No no....she will NOT save lives." -- Jordan F "Fear and anxiety are just excitement without the breath." -- Jordan's mom
"Let's go find that cute guy and get a hot dog ." -- Jeff
"Spread a little love...let someone merge." -- Sign on side of turnpike
"Every pothead has a bit of shade to him." -- Katie
" I love being good at my job." -- Emily
"You can't make a person less confused if he doesn't want to be." -- Jen
"Ah! Crop pant!" -- Monica
"Jane just brought one of those FUCKING HENS into her bedroom...oh my god now she's throwing the giblets at me." -- Jeff
"Now I get to be the man!" -- Jane
"Oh, I do have a hole there." -- Jordan
"Everything is better post-Erika." -- Erika
"Erika, I think god wants us to have green shit." -- Emily
"We can sleep in the stairwell, and be homeless people" -- Jen
"Or Emily, if she's eating something reallt yummy - she might be ovulating!" -- Erika
"I'm really worried I'm going to spontaneously ovulate." -- Erika
"You don't taste like anything." -- Emily to Erika
"Next guy that comes over - I'm gonna unicorn hump him." -- Erika
"Can you imagine signing a prostitute into your dorm?" -- Jane
"I thought your screen name meant you wanted world peace... but now i understand its just that you want everyone to have a piece of kate." -- Erika
"What are all those people running for?" -- Ditzy Girl @ Fenway
"Take care Catherine and keep smiling." -- Gran
"Every time I sit on one of these I think about my dead grandmother." -- Erika
"Nobody knows that I'm sqeezing my inner vaginal muscles (in class)." - guess who?
"I feel like a manic depressive on Blue's Clues." -- Erika
"Whatever, he seems like he would eat like hay...will you make him hay?" -- Emily
"Yeah fucking books." -- Emily
"Love is kinder to the lips than to the ear." -- John
"Do all British people do that?" -- Erika
"how scared would you be if Santa came and gave you head in your sleep?" -- Erika
"Wouldn't it be scary to be in a giant uterus right now?" - Erika
"I don't think I'd ever want him to eat me out because I'd be afraid he'd snap it off." -- Erika
"Do you ever bite your arm to see how long it takes to relaly hurt?" -- Erika
"I think I'm a ROTC pussy!" -- Erika
"Everything for me comes back to music. I could care less about God." -- Amy
"Who is that woman on Catherine's wall?" -- Grandad, in reference to my Jim Morrison poster at home
"Christ, Erika is having a full night. And she's going dildo shopping in the morning....is there anything that girl can't do?" -- Emily
"Wait...how did we miss the bullfight?" -- Emily, at the end of Carmen
"It's like a big gloopy hat." -- Erika's description of a placenta
"Whoever gets pregnant first, I'm coming over to make placenta food recipes." -- Erika
"Sin is a math function." -- Smonica
"Dude, if studying was smell-related, I'd be screwed." -- Jen
"Think of the massive amounts of rainwater as washing away impurities not as an agent of drowning..." -- Zach
"My mind seems to be more in the Greek world than the modern." -- Scully
"Dude, this must be an equal opportunity employer." -- Emily in Star Market
"Being a badass gives me a cold ass." -- Emily
"And like a hobo I was washing in there..." -- Erika
"It's something in Pennsylvania...like capuccino in a bucket or something." -- Emily, describing Wawa.
"I'm never speaking up again." -- John Mayer
"If you have time in the next couple of days, can you read over my Stanford essay and see how it looks? (it's due Thurs, so if you don't get to it by Wed afternoon don't worry about it). It kind of sucks, because I haven't put any time into it and I don't care." -- Email from Vicki
"Is that just me, but would that be called genocide anywhere else?" -- kelly bundle on the killing of all the native americans
"The pill has reversed it's function what and become Satan's apprentice." -- Katie, on my endometrium issues
"my mom always plays the sex game." -- emu
"What are you, like Switzerland?" Jon Dulong to Emily Quinn
"Oh god, now catherine is looking in mein kampf for references to breasts.." -- emu
"Misery's the river of the world- everybody ROW." -- Jeff
"What a twisted, TWISTED love trapezoid this is!" -- jane
"You're just like my ninth graders...and jeff." -- jane
"Pause you who read this, and think for a moment of the long chain of iron or gold, of thorns or flowers, that would never had bound you, but for the formation of the first link on one memorable day." -- Charles Dickens
"I don't know what kind of crazy diseases you have, but I don't think a yeast infection is supposed to look like tuna, baked beans, and cheese." -- Erika
"But you're NOT an oscar meyer weiner so no one loves you...that's the flip side of that song." -- Emu to downcast Erika
"Veil'd in a Cloud of Fragrance, where she stood,
Half spi'd, so thick the Roses bushing round
About her glow'd, oft stopping to support
Each Flow'r of slender stalk, whose head though gay
Carnation, Purple, Azure, or spek't with Gold,
Hung drooping unsustain'd, them she upstays
Gently with Myrtle band, mindless the while
Herself, though fairest unsupported Flow'r,
From her best prop so far, and storm so nigh.
-- John Milton, Paradise Lost
"nothing like paper cuts on your rectum yo" - emu
"dude, if two torsoes 69ed it would be a circle." - emu
"...actually it would be an oval." -emu
"and then he surrendered at apax court house, right?" -- jenny p
"Get out of her!...bed." - Emily
"I was in the study lounge this morning, and all I could smell was myself." -- Nicole
"I think that series of events was very indicative of our characters...you jumped on the bed, i copied you and John threw himself on the floor..." -- Me to Emily
"There's like this weird flapping noise when I walk." -- Emily
"Oh shit! Who's been practicing Dory's fake signature on her jury duty envelope??" -- Erika
"Jeff, are you playing with your scary toy again?" -- Mrs. Lockhorn
