A Woman's Place

She walks down the crowded street, her 5 inch stilettos set the beat for the movement of her body. Her head is held high with her dyed blonde hair pulled up loosely, and her feminine curves cut their purposeful course through the crowd. A faint smile graces her face. The future is hers.

What will happen to her dreams?

Gender roles - an over used topic? Maybe, but throughout history, there has been disparity in the place of and for women. While many ancient cultures built their societies around notions of an “earth mother,” their women were thought of as property to be owned, decorative furniture, or livestock. Women were slaves used for labor and sex by their masters or owners. Noted and respected scholars and philosophers ( Aristotle's Politics, for example), as well as most, if not all, major religions relegated women to endure despicable treatment at the hands of their husbands, i.e. masters, and there was no protection. From "Earth Mother" to slave to _______??? Where are we today?

• Are men and women different beneath the skin?

  Yes!!! Absolutely and gloriously. If it were not so, there would be no need in nature for both. Whether Creationist, Evolutionist or something in between, we must see that time would have erased one or the other or somehow combined them if they were not both necessary. That has not occurred! There are physiological, emotional, and psychological differences that play into the equation of man + woman = greatness! Though these differences vary from individual to individual, there are some generalities that are scientifically accepted. There have been several metaphors used to try to define the general differences between men and women.

  • Men are from Mars, and women are from Venus. What does this mean? Well, Mars, in Roman mythology, was the god of fertility and vegetation, and also became associated with battle. So that says to me men represent the fertility of the species as well as the protection thereof via battle. Meanwhile, women as associated with Venus, are often seen as representative of love and beauty. My interpretation of these differences involve how we relate to one another. It has been said that men love everyone, while women love you. Do you see the difference?
  
  
  • Another metaphor often used assigns the image of a laser beam to the male and a radar dish to the female. This is probably my favorite. The female is continuously scanning the horizon of trouble, for issues. When a bleep is discovered, she informs the male, who then focuses intently (like a laser beam) on that trouble until it is obliterated! Do you get the idea?

• How do I define “feminism”?

  Today, I define feminism as women, generally unhappy with themselves - for any number of reasons, attempting to compare themselves to their male counterparts. Sadly, many women have determined that the only way to "beat" the old mindset of male dominance is to become more masculine. Many women have hardened themselves, unnaturally, creating an unattractive image. This has done little other than to confuse the issue further, and it seems to me that women have no real image, no real identity other than the ones that come out of Hollywood. Is the “Super Woman”, size 2 woman Hollywood presents OUR image? Or is it just another in a long list of images MEN have created for us? Where is the intelligent and independent, sexy and beautiful, strong and adaptable woman? Surely, we are not Barbies? Can a women be feminine, sexy and successful? Of course.

  I was in the city of Pittsburgh the other day, and though there are many women in positions of authority and power, as I walked the streets, what I saw often was women dressed like men. Even the well-dressed women, successful attorneys and businesswomen wore pinstriped suits or tailored suits fashioned after men’s suits. Obviously this is a superficial observation, yet surely there is a choice?

  Does equality mean women must be more like men? I hope not! I enjoy being a woman! It’s time to embrace our femininity, ladies. This does not mean we cannot be equally successful in business beside our male counterparts. For too long, we've been taught that male logic supercedes female intuition or compassion. HOGWASH! Men declared that so! The marketplace needs BOTH, the political world needs both, the business world needs both, the classroom needs both, and the home needs both. We’ve been silent, barefoot and pregnant long enough. Our world and its porblems are screaming for women's perspective, women's compassion, and women's insight. This by no means we cannot devote ourselves to the care of our family and children, but again, raising children is a team task with each parent performing different functions at different times.

• How do you view the concept of "submission", and is there a place for it in your relationship(s)?
  
  Submission, can be defined as the willing surrender to the authority or power of another. Life is filled with such authoritative or submissive possibilities, but for any relationship to be healthy, if there is submission, it must be mutual, even as respect go both ways. It matters not whether the relationship is friendship or romance, both individuals must realize the other as being of equal value to the relationship, an equal partner. I do not subscribe to the 50/50 equation. It’s 100/100, or it is not healthy. Either I am totally committed, or not. If I am not, the relationship is of less value to me.
  
  There are many women and men today, even in the USA, who subscribe to some degree of gender role assignment whether they know it or not. If you don't believe me, look around! Listen to music, especially hip-hop! Check out the local religious orders. I am not "picking" on those of faith, however, if our basic presumptions of life are based on incorrect information or perceptions concerning gender, our entire perspective will be tainted.
  
  Biblically, believers are exhorted to prefer one another, to serve one another. This is a basic tenet of the faith. It is mutual submission and is an active demonstration of love, trust and respect.
  
  
  • Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. Eph 5:33
  
  
  
  • 3 For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith. 4 For as we have many members in one body, but all the members do not have the same function, 5 so we, being many, are one body in Christ, and individually members of one another. Rom 12:3 - 5

  If you go on to read the rest of Rom 12, it talks about how the Body of Christ is supposed to work together, love one another and prefer one another. If this is so in the Church, how much more should it be mirrored in the home between a husband and his wife?

  Historical examples of “a woman’s place”:

  • "When a woman becomes a scholar there is usually something wrong with her sexual organs." ~ Friedrich Nietzsche
  • "Direct thought is not an attribute of feminity. In this, women are now centuries behind man." ~ Thomas Edison
  • "Nature intended women to be our slaves. They are our property." ~ Napolean Bonaparte
  • "Women are like elephants. Everyone likes to look at them but no-one likes to have to keep one." ~ WC Fields
  • "Women should be obscene and not heard." ~ Groucho Marx
  • "Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel." ~ Leonardo Di Vinci

  It is from this unsightly heritage that today's concepts and ideas are examined and adopted. In other words, it was accepted truth in these ancient cultures that women were inferior to men, so this was the preconceived perspective from which all new concepts or ideas were introduced. It is rather like looking at the world through a sheet of blue cellophane. Everything is seen through that cellophane. It colors homes, businesses, churches, and even people! This is background of modern cultures.

  How far have we come, ladies? I mean really?

  1. Are Men and Women identical beneath the skin? (i.e. other than physical attributes)?
  
  
  2. How do you define "feminism"?
  
  
  3. How do you view the word or concept of "submission" and is there a place for it in your relationship(s)?

  More on this topic, read "10 Lies the Church tells Women" HERE