YA KNOW YA GHETTO IF...

1.You moved out of state to go to community college.

2.You own ANY hair beads.

3.Your grandmother is 36 and she is always saying, "I ain't keepin' that baby I'm going out tonight!

4. You eat a sandwich that does not contain any meat.(i.e. mayonnaise sandwich)

5. You're mama is so stupid she sold her car for gas

6. You are grown when you finally find out that milk doesn't come from a white powder

7. You try to use old soap residue to make a new bar of soap

8. If your 3 year old can't talk but can do the tootsie-roll - Jason Small - Memphis, TN - Homepage -- Email

9. You go to pick up your welfare check and your grandma asks if you can get hers, too - Punkspop - Denver - Email

10. You have ever washed paper plates - Jazz - Ft. Worth, TX - Email

11. If you've ever worn a T-shirt with someone's name on the back and you don't even know them - Star - Ft. Worth (Funky Town) TX. - Email

12. You ever took the batteries out of your smoke detector to put them in your pager - John - Acton, MA - Email

13. You use a Mayo jar as a cup to drink out of - Damn Dog - West Hood Rocks, CA

14. If you have a cup of bacon fat on your stove - Tiffany Ridley - Boston, MA - Email

15. You ask for foil at the end of a dinner party -OR- you always gotta take a plate home for "Momma Nem" - Kennie L - Atlanta, GA - Email

16. If your kid doesn't know "Yankee Doodle" but knows all the words to Master P's songs - Chris Ruffin - P Town, VA

17. You have three Q's in your first name - BMJ - Tulsa, OK

18. If you always thought "red" was the flavor of Kool Aid - Wendy - VA.

19. If you iron dirty clothes -OR- If you have a TV that works, sitting on a TV that doesn't work - Taadow - Liberty City, FL - Email

20. If you can read your haircut - Melissa Garza - Austin, TX. - Email

21. If you use a coffee can to hold you hot oil after cooking - Sheniqua Gray - Bergenfield, NJ

22. When you don't freeze your Flavor Ices & drink them on those hot summer days - Dant'e Gabrielli - Middletown, DE

23. If you go to the store in bedroom shoes -OR- If you live at your mother's sister's, aunt's house with your three kids and ex-con boyfriend - Rod Little - Thomasville, NC - Email

24. When you end words that have an "ed" with another "ed" (i.e. skinneded) - Amber - Indiana Homepage

25. You light toothpicks on your birthday cake when you are out of candles - Lee - North Carolina Email

26. When the police knows your whole family -OR- You use sheets as curtains - Michelle - Piscataway Email

27. If part of your living room is on the front porch - Tracy Davis - Mobile AL

28. Your mother recycles birthday candles to use them at the next birthday party - Chek - Newark, NJ

29. If you use Dawn dishwashing liquid as bubble bath -OR- You pee in the shower - Sasha - Email

30. When you put salt on your food BEFORE you taste it -OR- When you name your kids cars you can't afford - Natalie - Email

31. You block off your street to play kick ball - E. Dayton - Largo, MD

32. You have to watch your TV through your neighbor's window. - Nicole - Maryland - Email

33. You use 50% coupons at the dollar store -OR- You have brown spots on your ceiling from killing roaches - Avionna Jones - Maryland

34. You have a car phone and no car - Brandee - Baltimore - Email

35. You've ever rented a studio "sleeper" apartment - Hollywood Johnson - Email

36. You child can spell better than you -OR- You and your daughter go out to night clubs together - Renee - Houston, TX - Email

37. You open the oven door to heat the whole house - Krystal Turner - Las Vegas, NV

38. You have to chain up your bike inside of your house -OR- You think Spam is a delicacy -OR- that salmon only comes in cans - T3 - Boston, MA - Email

39. You have gotten beaten with an iron coat hanger - Zenovia -Email

40. You didn't graduate from high school, but you have a major record deal - Dyanna M - Atlanta, GA - Email

41. If you have ever made toast in the broiler of your oven and you have a toaster - Nikki- CA

42. if you wear socks with high heels - Tiffanie H. - Cleveland, OH

44. If you have a big wooden spoon and fork hanging up in your kitchen. -OR- You wrap toilet tissue around the chest of your Barbie doll for clothes - Karen - Email

46. if u where a shower cap every where else except the shower. - Shenequa - Florida -Email

47. you think that putting batteries in the refrigerator will recharge them - Nekia - Brooklyn - Email

48. If your rims on your car cost more than your car.- Adrian Muhammad - Mobile, AL Email

49. you buy a present for you mother sister and girlfriend and only have to buy one - Denise

50. if you have a big wooden spoon and fork hanging up in your kitchen. -OR- You wrap toilet tissue around the chest of your Barbie doll for clothes - Karen - Email

51. You have ever had a fried baloney sandwich - Brie

52. When you have relatives named T.T., Ray-Ray or Junebug. - Ann - Atlanta, GA

53. when you don't want nobody to see you in your mother's car.- kimosobee - Tallahassee

54. If you keep your food stamps on a money clip -OR- you have more than 20 bullet holes in your house -OR- you skip your rent to buy the new Jordans -OR- more than five people owe you child support -OR- if the only art you own is on your fingernails. -OR- something smells spoiled in your refrigerator and all you do is change the box of baking soda. -OR- the heels on your feet look like you've been kicking flour. C&J - Email

55. if you ever ate a mustard sandwich for a meal - major - Email

56. if you put your phone bill in your baby's name! - Amanda Clark - Joplin, MO - Email

57. If you are walking down the street eating fried chicken with a robe and some bedroom slippers on. - Dominique Medley - Washington DC - Email

58. If you have a screen door, yet you have no screen - Brie- Email

59. Your Favorite flavor of Kool-Aid is RED! - LionesDeVa - Decatur - Email

60. Your gold tooth hits your girls gold tooth when you kiss and you think its a sign - Nino - Syracuse, NY - Email

61. ghetto if you got your baby's daddy name tattoo on your breast- Careal Nash,II - JACKSON,MISSISSIPPI - Email

62. if you can outrun a police dog. - New York,NY - Email

63. if your car costs more than your house. - Tommy

64. If you eat or have eaten syrup sandwiches! - L.C. - Greenbelt, MD - Email

65. if your kid think his real name is little man - mokey

66. You eat egg sandwiches. -OR- You pee in the street. -OR- Your car rims are more expensive then your car. -OR- you put Sweet-in-low in your Kool-Aid. -OR- You put Water in your cereal instead of milk. -OR- Putting Hangers on your T.V. with foil on top.-OR- Your 13 Year old sister has two baby daddies - Orlando Sanders - Dayton, Ohio

67. If you got your pager at the store on the corner and a week later the place close down -OR- If you read the magazines in the store because you can't afford to pay for it and bring it home - La La - Salisbury, NC - miss_la_la@hotmail.com

68. if you have more gold in your mouth than gold on your neck

69. you know you ghetto when you comb your hair with a fork - tyeshia hunter - reehunter@aol.com

70. You think jury duty is a good way to make money - Jermaine - D.C.

71. You know your ghetto if you see your homies on America Most Wanted - Butterfly- Maryland- ImajinGrl2@aol.com

72. If you black and have blue or green eyes -OR- If you put hot sauce on everything - Pookie - South Side Alabama - DyceyMama@aol.com

73. If your old enough to buy alcohol in high school -OR-If you claim other peoples kids on your income tax. - Moni - Alabama - MISSMONIB@excite.com

74. If you buy merchandise, such as FUBU,Gucci shades, baby clothes or watches from street venders who come in your beauty salon or barber shop - Jones - Dallas, Tx

75. If you have to put books under your bed to keep it level.

-OR- You have two trailers put together to make a doublewide - Sweat - Valdosta, GA - moni@surfsouth.net

76. You know your ghetto when the charm on your necklace is bigger than your head or when your kids get free lunch - Nicole - Lincoln, Alabama - nicolegurl@aol.com

77. When you used up all the minutes on your calling card and try to make up new numbers

-OR- if your kids don't know the alphabet but knows all the Ruff Riders songs - Shari - South Carolina - badandsassy@yahoo.com

78. You know you're ghetto if you have plastic seat covers on all your furniture - KAS BERNARD - MARGATE FL - KWBERNARD@HOTMAIL.COM

79. You go to the store wit food stamps and have a 14k gold money clip

- OR- you wear house shoes to the gas station- Angela M. - Representin Ypsilanti, Michigan - ghettoboo85@hotmail.com

80. When you call your momma by her first name or she still roll her hair with brown paper bags or take toilet paper from the local McDonalds - lijoya - fairfax, VA - Lijoya@hotmail.com

81. U know u ghetto when u wear socks wit sandals - Babygirl - D.C.

82. When u brush yo teeth wit yo finger - Zakeisha - DETROIT

83. You eat Kool-Aid mix - Lil_toya - CALIFORNIA

84. You know you're ghetto when you part your hair with a fork

-OR- You use Jell-O packs with Kool-Aid - Allicia - WilFall4me@aol.com

85. When you have a taped movie that came out two days ago. - Nashville, TN

86. When "Cops" is shot on location in your neighborhood on a regular basis. - Nashville, TN

87. When you have bought more hair than you will ever grow. - Nashville, TN

88. When you hand wash dishes with a working dishwasher in the house - Nashville, TN

89. When your children sell ten cent Kool-Aid bags in grade school. - Nashville, TN

90. If you use your weave more than once - Belinda - Fort Lauderdale,Florida

91. When you eat your cereal out of a pot - Gina - California

92. If you have to safety-pin your shirt where the button fell off - Cleveland, TN.

93. You know you're ghetto if when your relatives try to kick out of their house, you remind them that you paid rent the last two months by "sharing your food stamps."

94. You know your ghetto if you go to the dollar store and ask for a price check -or-

You wear timberland work boots and you don't have a job.

You use canned milk in the baby's bottle or on cold cereal. - Beverly -- BALTIMORE,MARYLAND - email

95. You know you're ghetto when you part your hair with a fork -OR-

You use Jello packs with kool-aid. - Allicia - RI - email

96. When you know brothers that know where and how to get everything, but a job. - Nashville, TN

97. When "Cops" is shot on location in your neighborhood on a regular basis. - Nashville, TN

98. When you have bought more hair than you will ever grow. - Nashville, TN

99. You use your plastic shower cap for a sandwich bag - FoxyBrown - DC - email

100. You invite guests over for dinner and realize that you have forgotten the soda, so you melt red popsicles and our it into glasses - FoxyBrown - DC - email

101. ...when you have lime green shoes to match your lime green bag that you bought on sale to match your lime green shirt... - Gonz - Philly - email

102. When you stay unemployed to avoid paying child support - Chaka - Minneapolis - email

103. When you watch Jerry Springer and see somebody you used to date - email

104. If you are ghetto when you use duck tape to keep your babies diaper on - Dianna - Arizona - email

105. If you have ever gotten phone service, electricity or cable in a dead relatives name - Beverly - Baltimore - email

106. If you are invited to a bring a dish event you bring a package of 8 hot dogs and ten people with you. - Beverly - Baltimore - email

107. If your name ends with "sha, qua, or tha" - Nobby - London - email

108. If your kids asks the sunday school teacher if heaven gotta' ghetto - Ron - Cali - email

108. You know u ghetto when u have the superfly movie in your video library along with dolemite - Ron - Cali - email

109. When you ask yo mom for money an you tellz her you'll pay her back but you aint got no job - - sergio soto - Southern Cali - email

110. you ghetto when yo grandma iz under 40 - sergio soto - Southern Cali - email

111. Yu know u ghetto when u got more drug connections than the FBI - haktu - halifax, canada

112. u know u ghetto when your mom sells more dope than you do! - haktu - halifax, canada

113. u know u ghetto if you got no alarm clock and police sirens wake you up at 7 in the morning! - haktu - halifax, canada

114. u know u ghetto when you think the police is a terrosist group! - haktu - halifax, canada

115. When your stero system cost more than your car - alex - phoenix az - email

116. When you have a black Jesus on your wall - alex - phoenix az - email

117. When you wear a shower cap every where else but in the shower - shereeka - Florida

118. You know you are ghetto when always drive to work but everyday you have to catch the bus home. - Mirage - Houston - email - homepage.

119. If you couldn't go out 'cause ya had to go to an "intervention" for ya Uncle Bay-Bay - DC - Minneapolis - email

120. All your friends calls your kids by nicknames because they can't pronounce the 12-syllable name you made up when they were born- DC - Minneapolis - email

121. When you think goin' to jail is "keepin' it real!" - DC - Minneapolis - email

122. you have a supa fly loc-ed out ride and you still live wit ya Moms - DC - Minneapolis - email

123. You have basic cable but get all the pay channels 'cause you bought an illegal box from "G" down at the rec center - DC - Minneapolis - email

124. You can never keep a phone, cell, or pager number for more than a month - Raquel Morales - Cali-WessSIDE-holla holla @ me - email

125. If you mama ever put a penny in the fusebox because the fuse blew out - Gloria - Maryland

126. Your grandma raised you because your mama was in jail or just too young. - Gloria - Maryland

127. If you ever had to use the stove for heat. - Gloria - Maryland

128. If your mama still fistfights with her neighbors. - Gloria - Maryland

129. You know you are ghetto if you ever got whipped with a hotwheel track. - 100proof - Houston, Texas - Email

130. You send your kids your sister's kids and the neighbor's kids in the store each with a $1 food stamp to each buy 1 pack of kool-aid. - MKALIMU - Texas - Email

131. You know you are ghetto when you go to the all-you-can-eat buffet, eat your meal, then sneak pieces of fried chicken into your purse - MAJI - DEEETROIT - Email - homepage

132. If you run out of hair gel you use vasoline instead - TooGhetto - San Diego

133. You know your Ghetto if you steal food from Wal-Mart - Josh Martin - Bristoll

134. You use up your paycheck to get your hair and nails done and borrow money to get your baby some milk. - Tanasha - Albuquerque, NM - Email