ACTIVE LISTENING,
A Tool For Improving Your Important Relationships
Prof C. J. Fernandes, Communication Studies
CHA - The Lancaster Campus, HACC
Active listening has been around in various forms for some time. Just go to the Internet and
type “active listening” in just about any search engine and you will get tons of information on it. Lots of different disciplines use active listening. Law enforcement, management and leadership, and human services disciplines are just a few who employ active listening as an effective tool in getting their jobs done. But, what is active listening? Well,..... its a tool. Its a way of tuning into another human being in a non-evaluative, non-critical way for a limited period of time. Its a mode that you enter into and exit from. Its a reliable tool that only gets better with use.
There are some rules for active listening and some guidelines for executinging it properly.
The Rules for Active Listening:
1. NEVER INTERRUPT
2. NEVER OFFER ADVICE
3. NEVER COMMISERATE
4. ALWAYS PUT YOUR OWN AGENDA ON THE BACK BURNER
The Guidelines for Active Listening:
1. Nonverbal Attending Behaviors
a. Remove obstacles to concentration, like turning off a TV.
b. Maintain casual physical closeness
c. Maintain reasonable eye contact
d. Be animated and signal connection.
2. Verbal Attending Behaviors
a. Ask open ended questions
d. Deflect pleas for direction and advice with replies like: Well, if things could turn out the best for all concerned,, what would that look like?
c. Make audible sounds of connection like “I see” or “uh huh”
d. Paraphrase. WATCH OUT, THIS ONE CAN BE TRICKY!!!!!
e. Break cleanly and end the session.
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