LIKE IT!!

The Return to Oz is a story about a Dorothy after her first trip to Oz. You see, when she came back everyone backed away from her cos she's frikkin INSANE!! When i say insane i stretch out the -sane part so it's like "in-SAAAAANNNE!". Her folks can't handle the little basketcase. They send her to some mental hospital. She meets a wicked evil nurse... You know she's evil cos she's wearing all black and never smiles unless tragedy strikes.

They lock Dorth in a room while they set up the shock treatment machine. Dorth hears mental patients screaming and she's like "oh shaboody i need to get out of here". Up until now we think she's just a misunderstood child until a figure comes into the room and talks to her. Crazy kid. Anyway, goth nurse comes to take her away. Strapping her down on a table and wheeling her into the shock room.

There's a old wicked doctor in there who gives dorth some headphones. She's chillin with her headphones on waiting to be fried. Then bam lightening strikes, power goes out, all the goth people run to find out what's up. This leaves Dorth strapped to the table with her headphones thinking once again "oh shaboody i need to get out of here".

That mysterious girl comes out once again and de-straps dorth. They run away down to the river. Dorth floats down the river waking up in a cage. She's in the middle of a desert, oh no, it's OZ, with a talking chicken she used to know on the farm. She's like "you couldn't talk when we were on the prarie, what are yo.. OH! we must be in OZ!". Where chickens talk and dorth goes when she's trying to escape the evil clutches of the goth personell.

Oz is in ruins cos some evil stone guy took dorths ruby slippers and now he rules the land with his evil ways. All her old friends are turned to stone cos of him. She meets some new friend including a robot named tick tock or something and a moose couch... it scares the hell out of me i don't want to talk about it.

On the gangs magical adventures through oz land they meet this head changing queen and new wave guys who were just to new wave for the real world. They roll around on their hands with they're pink eyeshadow and receding hair lines. Actually, this is strange, i find these guys strangely attractive in a new wave sort of way.

The end is very rad. You have to see it.

There is no music, sniff sniff, But i do love this movie cos of it's freaky nature. I heard Adam Sandler is in it but i never saw him. Fairuza Balk is Dorothy. She was in some of my favourite movies (whose names i forgot at the moment, except for the craft) usually about witchery or difunctional families. She owns an occult supply shop called "Panpipies Magical Marketplace" in L.A. That's a long way from Dorothy. And thos new wave guys meeyow.


return to o.. er, muffin