I saw shayna lift something from claires, a little guatomoleoun doll, spell it like you say it. When we got outside she giggled like a little school girl and showed it to me, and i laughed at her for the mere fact that i saw her lifting stuff. what a novice. i began to unload my pockets of necklaces, earrings, scrunchies, backstreet boy crap... how'd that happen? oh dear god. Her jaw was as wide as her eyes. She didn't even see any funny "i did somethin baaad" expressions on my face in the store. i knew i was getting free stuff and it made me look a little happier then usual. it's free, you know, tax payers don't count. How did i do you? everyone seems to ask. so here, do not ask again...

how to shoplift from claires if your a wussy

1. look around a bit and act all nice and sweet. this means no bussin on sales people. no talking or looking at sales people. and no loud talking! Find something you like, limit of two things.

2. Go to the back of the store with all the crap in bins and such. Stick your hands way down in the bins and with one hand remove all the tags and backing from your crap. remain in the bin at all times.

3. stick it up in your sleeve. if your real cheap, grab some crap out of the cheap bin, 90% of it has no tags or is not attached to anything but really, be sure of this. plus, it's broke. that's why it's in the crap bin.

4. stick your hand in your pocket and go "where's my money?" drop everything you need in there.

5. look around a bit more and walk out. if you get caught i will laugh. and then i will put it on my website.

if you want to be blunt and just go sticking crap in your pockets and run out the store like you just seen some old ladies brains splattered about go ahead. but for ms wholesome like me, ha ha ha. can't finish that sentance, sorry.


beep beep beeep