I can be a very bitter woman sometimes... Most of the time... All the time, but if i am bitter i like to be bitter in peace. Like, let all the thoughts in my head percolate for a while so i can get it out of my system. Today, coming home from center city, i needed to let those juices percolate for a very an extended amount of time. I had to sit in front of a bickering couple for a half hour on a crowded train, worrying that the couple behind me were going to start throwing stuff. I get off the train, see my bus pulling away and run as if satan were behind me. (yes, i got the bus) Oh, what a great ride i had on the bus. i was in the back all alone and could totally pick my nose and perculate all i want with no shame. Maybe not pick my nose, but i loved that i could sit there in total silence. But the heat started getting to me. I became so motion sick that i was falling out of my seat. Half alive, about to melt, i crawled off the bus.
Oh, i didn't even start yet. I'm trying to walk down the street. There's a white pick up truck... it always seems to be a pick up truck... filled with sweaty fat men with no shirts and 5 teeth between the whole lot of them parked on the corner. Great. I'm trying to walk. I heard this loud whistle sound (he did this very well cos his only teeth were in the front, creating more like a "sheeeeee" sound instead of the norm "wooo") followed by "hey hey hey, look at that walk". Come on, i'm hunched over and dragging one leg and foaming at the mouth. Now you girls now what men really want (sorry, watched to many betty crocker commercials). I go through this everyday with guys in my neighbourhood who don't know where to draw the line. I hate guys like that. They make my stomach crawl. By this time they're all saying something obnoxious or making the "shheeee" sound. I turned around in all my mighty sweaty pride and said "what the (bleep) are you toothless (bleeps) doing? do you think women actually fall for that (bleep)" Out of all the billions of time that i've been catcalled, i've nver hollered. Once or twice i said something below my breath or said something like "can you please leave me alone, i'm not interested in you" which normally worked on the wacky silent types that followed you around but not on the sweaty old fat men. you should have seen the looks on their faces. it was classic. the one said "we were complimenting you, how dare you get mad!" and i said "i don't need your reassurance that my (bleeping) (bleep) is great, i (bleeping) know that my (bleep) is great, and i don't care what you guys think so (bleep) off!". they drove away. i went home and rounded up a $1.25 for a medium cherry waterice. I think i said it loud enough for everyone to hear. I went to the store and not one cat call.
Moral: hollering guys don't like they're female counterparts.
See the infamous satan one
shoo!
