Welcome to the Battlestar Pegasus. Here you will find a few Battlestar Galactic jokes.

HOTEL CARILLON

C. D. Norris (BSG-THEME RCE)

In a dark red Nova, heat's curlin' my hair, Warm smell of blown up mines, risin' up thru the air, Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmering light, Our hearts were heavy and our hopes were dim, Cuz we just lost the big fight...

Feather-head in the doorway, She knew our mission well, But I was thinkin' to myself This could be heaven but sure feels like hell Then I put up my sidearm, and she showed us the way There were voices from the catacombs I thought I heard them say

Welcome to the Hotel Carillon Such a lovely place, such a lovely place Such a lovely face. Plenty of room at the Hotel Carillon Any time of year, you get eaten here....

My mind was def'nitely twisted, My world just came to an end, I see a lot of fine Tucana girls--could be my friends Card games, dances, casinos--sweet idea, yet Some dance to remember, some drink to forget

So I called to my wingmate, "These dancers are fine!" He said we can't hire those ladies here, with our lives on the line, And still those voices are singing from far away Wake you up in the middle of the night Just to hear them say

Welcome to the Hotel Carillon Such a lovely place, Such a lovely place Such a lovely face. Livin' it up at the Hotel Carillon What a fuel supply Gonna help us fly....

Mirror globes on the ceiling, ambrosia on ice She said, we are all just prisoners here of those damned Red-Eyes And in the lower chambers, they gather us to feast And Cylons with their steely knives Don't care 'bout it in the least.

Last thing I remember, was the elevator door We had to find the passage back where we left our ships before Relax, said Queen Lotay, we are programmed to receive You can gamble any time you like But you can never leave...

Everything I Needed to Know in Life, I Learned from Watching BSG.

*Launch tubes are not a private place.

*When the Greeks made Apollo a god, they had a good reason.

*Never cheat a Cylon on Pyramid.

*There are always a couple of Vipers just waiting to launch.

*Fastened jackets are for wimps.

*Captainhood is never having to comb your hair.

*Your lasers don't really need to hit the target in order to blow it up.

*Medical studies don't take that long.

*The Commander knows best. We hope.

*Can't we all get along?

*Some people get all the fun.

*Know where your cubits are... at _all_ times.

*Be nice to the Commanders' daughters.

*Steam purges can really be hot topics.

*Never trust anyone who calls himself a Count.

*Don't stow away on shuttles; you might get the cold shoulder.

*Everybody is a member of Blue Squadron.

*Celestial domes are for “Taking in the View”

*Women pilots can kick butt.

*People can travel at the speed of light.

*Mushies are, well, ah, Mushies.

*Daggits have a nose for Mushies.

*Not everyone speaks English.

*Don’t trust your life to a Council.

Lastly, here are some Battlestar Galactica top-ten lists.

Battlestar Galactica Top-Ten Lists

Baltar's Top Ten List
Lucifers' Top Ten List
My Top Ten Reasons for watching Battlestar Galactica
Reasons Why We Love Battlestar Galactica
Reasons why we should hate Galactica 80
Reasons why we should like Galactica 80
Top Reasons for re-release of BSG Toys
Top Ten Reasons to watch Conquest of the Earth Home Video
Top Ten Reasons to watch Fire in Space
Top Ten Reasons to watch Lost Planet of the Gods
Top Ten Reasons to watch the Magnificent Warriors
Top Ten Reasons Why You Should Watch The Young Lords
Top Ten Reasons Why We Watch BSG
Top Ten Reasons Why We Watch Endless Battlestar Galactica Reruns
Top Ten Signs You're A Redneck Colonial