The sky was the colour that the sea is made to look in cartoons. An impossibly beautiful blue. I was lost in the vastness of it, allowing my mind to fly freely throughout like a plane without direction – just exploring. I was on the top of a hill nestled nicely in a blanket being consumed by the nature surrounding me. Luscious green grass unfolded as far as my eyes could reach. The sun warmed the air to a temperature so comfortable that the notion of weather was forgotten, like it never existed. The silk white dress I was wearing felt like heaven against my pale skin that delighted in the dreamy milieu. I ran my fingers through my curls, letting them become lost in the long black softness. Basking; the day was like a river running coolly and at it’s own pace, without thought for where it was headed or why it was headed there, and as my mind eased itself slowly out of the sky and into a nice landing on the ground, I sat up and scanned the landscape before me. That was when I found him.

He was ambling around aimlessly, as if he didn’t know where he was but didn’t really care. This was the first time I’d ever seen anybody else at the hill. He was at the bottom just kind-of staring forward. His unkempt blond hair felt out to his shoulders, resting on his lime jacket. Slightly ripped and faded jeans wore his legs inside them.

I watched him silently, the way you watch a fascinating bird, all the time examining and edging nearer, yet remaining extremely careful not to scare it away. His footsteps were noiseless, so inconspicuous, I thought, so shy. I realized that if I’d kept my eyes swimming in the sky, I wouldn’t have even registered his existence. I was immensely thankful that things had worked out this way instead.

There was something about him that brought me out of my blanket and to my feet. It was as if his energy was calling out to mine. A secret exchange between entities convinced that this stranger and I had to meet. Whatever it was, I obeyed. I left the comfort of my blanket behind and began my descent down the hill. I had made most of the way by the time he turned and noticed me. His eyes followed my feet for a moment before slowly scanning upward, taking me in as if I were a painting. His gaze froze on me and, as I continued my decline, remained trained, affixed, as if he were hypnotized. His eyes were as blue and vast as the sky and his skin appeared soft as sand. As our bodies became closer, an immeasurable attraction filled me. When we finally came together, face to face, it was all I could do to avoid pouncing on him. Thankfully he wasn’t so reserved. Within a matter of seconds he had one hand on my hip and one in my hair and we were kissing with more fervor than I’d ever felt in my life. It felt almost surreal as our tongues danced with each other like leaves in a breeze, moving together mindlessly, instinctively. We melted into each other, eclipsing the unyielding beauty that surrounded us.

The teacher was going on about something. I was listening, but nothing sunk in. As if her words weren’t real. Around me were my classmates, all vacant and meaningless. Their faces indistinguishable and their presence empty. I’m sure there were words or equations written up on the whiteboard, but my mind couldn’t grasp or make any sense of them. Despite the vagueness of everything, there was a sense of inevitable occasion in the air. The scene washed over me, timeless moments passing by, before I felt the touch of a hand on my shoulder. Shivers instantly wormed down my spine and a chill filled my body, mixing with the inexplicable warmth that had also occupied. I turned slowly to find the face of the blond haired boy, eyes wide and smile prevalent. He looked as joyous to see me as I felt to see him and there, in the middle of class, we embraced. I stood up from my seat and he took me instantly in his hands. I felt like a newly born infant being held for the first time by its birth giver. Completely at home and at peace. His expert hands wandered freely about my body, moving inside my uniform and creating a tingling sensation wherever his fingers touched my skin.

The entire class disappeared from around us. The teacher vanished. The scenery enveloping us dispatched of everything, leaving only him and I, entangled and lost in ecstasy. Time doesn’t stretch as far as I wanted that moment to. Nothing lasts as long as I wanted that feeling to last.

The music was loud and sounded like it was going in slow motion as countless strangers danced all about me as if I were the sun and they were planets. I felt like the centre of all existence, though none of them paid me any regard. I didn’t know anyone but it didn’t matter, there was only one person I had any interest in seeing, an aching longing for him ubiquitous within me. Aside from that yearning, it felt like nothing mattered, like I was separated from the rest of the world by an invisible wall, just spectating. A stargazer. Suddenly, the floor beneath me began to move. The strangers, still dancing, pushed past me in what seemed like a mass exodus. Only, it was me who was moving. Unwittingly wading my way through the ocean of bodies, being carried along by the stream of music. As my feet led me to wherever I was going, the music became more defined. I was now able to hear it clearly and could decipher the words.

It was my favourite song; a tune that I’d fallen in love with from the second it availed itself to my ears. A love song that deep down I knew was written for me.

As I continued walking, the guitar riff attached itself to my being and began controlling me like a puppeteer. Lights flashed above me relentlessly, mesmerizing my eyes with a captivating explosion of colors. I felt possessed, as if I’d lost any free will I’d ever had. Though for some reason, I didn’t care.

Then he appeared, dancing among the strangers, though completely on his own. The back of his head, his long reaching hair moving with the music, identified him to my eyes. The distance between us shortened as my feet continued carrying me along, and everything inside me wanted for him to turn around and rest his view upon my visage. He did.

The human obstacles separating us obscured into nothingness. My surroundings became less pronounced until it was only he and I existing. The rest of the world may have been around us, the lights may still have been flashing when we came together but I never would have noticed. Whenever his presence pervaded, he was all there was to life.

His kiss touched mine and our eyes connected us. The music had stealthily slithered away by the time he spoke his words.

“You’re here.” He said airily, his arms around my waist, mine around his shoulders. I felt blessed and blissful in his company.

“I love your song.” I replied, prompting his sweet smile to broaden itself.

“I thought I’d never see you again. I thought you’d disappeared.” He seemed so relieved to be speaking in the past tense. In that moment I knew that I meant as much to him as he did to me and that knowledge only served to extend the elation in my mind.

“Why would you think that?” I asked, sensing this was something that he wished to get off his chest. He sighed, as if thinking back to his trauma reignited it. I held him closer in an effort to calm his demeanor.

“You were gone. I couldn’t find you anywhere.” His response was choked and painful and I quickly counteracted with reassurance.

“I’ve been here all the time.” I kissed him gently on the cheek a few times, laying my lips closer to his each time until they finally met once and tenderly.

“Yeah,” he said, apparently calming, “I know.” We hugged contentedly, glad to be in each others arms after what seemed like forever apart. I felt like everything in the world was right and that if I could extend this one moment into an eternity, I would. Then, his grip on me loosened. Anxiety instantly consumed me as he backed away slightly, a look almost of fright in his eyes. Worried, wondering what was going on yet having the deepest inkling that I somehow knew, I listened as he spoke again.

“This isn’t…”

The world began to disintegrate as my blond love began fading away, irrational distance suddenly appearing between us. I was panicked but he just stood where he was, still and eyeing downward. Appearing to be in a state of profound concentration, as if he were fighting a war in his head. More timeless moments passed by before he again appeared directly in front of me, our arms and eyes connecting us passionately.

“I just want you to know that I love you and that I hope I see you again.” His hands clasped my face as he penetrated me with his message. “And I’m so sorry that this isn’t real.” Then he guided my face to his one last time, our lips meeting, our tongues dancing, and my mind finally waking to the reality that I’d always known, somewhere, some way. This was all a dream. This perfect blond desire of mine didn’t really exist, he was just a figment of my subconscious; my dream man.

“I’ll find a way to see you again. I’ll go to sleep, I’ll dream of you again.” I whispered, hoping to calm him like I had earlier, but the upset contortion on his face told me that I hadn’t succeeded. He hugged me tightly and then looked at me, his eyes upset.

“But it’s me who’s dreaming.” He said illogically, his tone serious, and as I went to shake my head and correct him, his words reverberated wildly until they formed the crux of my entire existence. Again the world disintegrated, again he became far away, and again he began to fade. He was dreaming. Now, he was beginning to awake. The truth chilled me like a winter wind as for one brief moment, everything became clarified. He wasn’t my dream man. I was his dream girl. A figment of his imagination created by his subconscious. Outside of this world was an entirely differently reality in which he resided. One I would never experience, because the moment he returned to it, I would disappear.