Haikus (25/4/03)

BRAIN CELLS

Eating my brain cells
I’m drowning in alcohol
And I’m loving it

SINKING

Sinking deeper down
Self-destruction is my aim
Vision’s blurry, now gone

AXIS OF BUSH

Starving Iraqis
On my television screen
Syria is next

PANADOL KICKS ARSE

Too much medicine
Spinning uncontrollably
Drugs are so much fun

SCHOOL

School is such a waste
Wish someone would burn it down
Can of gasoline

DUBYA

He’s a weatherman
Predicts the rain ‘fore it pours
Forecast never wrong

CHUCK

Chuck Palahniuk
Survivor, Choke and Fight Club
You sir, are a God

SALIVATING

Ten beers in the fridge
Salivating at the thought
Of getting hammered

UNORIGINAL

Creed: they hurt my ears
Stealing Eddie Vedder’s voice
Does not make you cool

COMFORTABLY NUMB

Puff puff, breath it in
Lift the weight off your shoulders
Comfortably numb

TRENDY

Must wear the right clothes
Say the right things, act normal
Don’t step out of place

MATT MOON

Matt Moon is a girl
Screams like a friggin’ Banshee
But the kid writes well

LUCIDITY

I’m lucid dreaming
Think ‘bout hot chicks and they’re there
This is addictive
ASTRAL PLANE

On the Astral Plane
Stealing kids’ life energy
Need it for myself

TELEVISION

I watch you all day
You take my mind and mold it
I’m a brain dead drone

STILL BORN

Still borns aren’t funny
It’s stupid to say they are
Why am I laughing?

RELIGION

Jesus existed
But he’s not a deity
Just some rotting corpse

BELIEVE

Who to believe in?
Mohammed, God or Vishnu?
Which church tells the truth?

BORED

I’m so fucking bored
Sitting here all by myself
I wish I was dead

LORDS

Lord Of The Ringworms
Such an entertaining film
Makes me feel horny