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You Know You Live

At 704 State St First Floor

When...


1) You shower once every 2 days

2) You don't shower on Sundays, not for no one

3) People visiting wear sandals into the shower

4) The garbage in the kitchen gets removed once a month

5) For that entire month you must walk around a diameter of 10 feet of garbage

6) The stove could probably be lit just by putting a match to it without the gas being on

7) Broken glass on the floor results in 'cautious' barefoot walking

8) It's not to be picked up until the garbage goes out

9) Your feet or socks are black

10) You spend your time on your computer or upstairs

11) Leo has thrown something at you and yelled at you when you've done nothing

12) Everyday looks like you've had a party, except that last time there was one was 2 weeks ago

13) Dishes? Who needs dishes?

14) Cups? Who needs those either?

15) Instead of cleaning old dishes, they get smashed with a hammer outside

16) Food is in the fridge and closet from when Kling, Leo and Olsen lived here (2001)

17) The NYMO & Road Runner people are ready to break your legs cause the bills havent been paid in months

18) People ask to leave their stuff here over the summer, its Sept 25th, it's still here

19) You get a piece of plywood nailed over you door while your out drinking

20) The cat from next door sneaks into your house everyday

21) When you ask what someone's making you say "What ya jerking? Jerk n cack?"

22) You invent a utensil called a 'spoontula'

23) The bathroom sink is clogged for a week so you use a cup to shave

24) You also use very little water to wash your hands

25) Theres hair all over the bathroom from Seth's uneven haircuts that he gives himself

26) A long mirror is facing you when you go to the bathroom

27) The bathroom floor is always wet

28) You have Schriers fish here all summer, never feed them and somehow they live

29) You hate seeing the landlord because you know he's coming to clean something, and you can't help but feel sorry and decide to help him

30) You steal cable from upstairs

31) Anytime someone touches the cable wire, static comes on

32) Instead of cleaning for a party, you push everything into the living room and put a big cloth hanging thing over it and call it clean

33) You play Madden whenever you have a free moment

34) You have never hung out in your own living room

35) The lights are off as often as possible as to save money on the bills

36) The kitchen floor is sticky

37) 'Garbage Stacking' is considered an art form

38) Seth is known as 'Tha Cuddla'

39) The heat doesn't work except in the bathroom and the living room

40) Everything can be put into a fajita wrap

41) Hot sauce is the hot condiment of choice

42) Nothing solves a fly problem like a shop-vac

43) You don't want your parents to visit you because then you will have to (a) clean or (b) hear their dissappointment with how you live

44) You still get mail for people who lived here 2 years ago

45) We get mail/phone calls for Olsen, or as these people know him "TheOnePaul Olsen"

46) What's a lock?

47) An Ice Fight took place in the living room, we let the water naturally clean itself up

48) I suggest that we turn the emptied out room as soon as you walk in the house into a giant fish tank

49) You go about 4 months without putting light bulbs into any sockets, so that the first light youcan turn on is the bathroom light

50) Over the summer, you have tripped over the TV blocking the hallway atleast once

51) Over the summer, you had to move a mattress and a desk to get to the frig

52) You had to move cinder blocks and a DVD rack to get to the oven

53) You haven't bought paper towels or toilet paper since January, you steal it from campus

54) Toilet paper and paper towels are referred to as 'H-whacking paper'


Well there's more, just can't think now.

704 State St first floor is Eddie, Seth and Bill

 


This page was created on 9/25/2003 and last updated on 9/25/2003

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