Letters to an acquaintance:

From the moment I met you

From the moment I set eyes on you

I knew that you would be a great friend

But then it turned

My feelings for you became deep

I cannot act on those feelings

For reasons you already know

For many weeks all I wanted to do was go to you

And find you

Once I hurt you and pushed you away

As a friend you didn’t want me around anymore

This is something I always do

As a child I did trust people

I had many friends

But then things changed and what I thought were friends

Hadn’t been friends at all

I was teased and bullied so…

Even as a child I pushed people away

I didn’t want to get too close

For fear of being hurt

So I did what I had to do

To keep my heart safe

I put a wall up and I guarded myself and my heart

And if I did make a friend

I lived in fear that one day they would hurt me

So I would hurt them first and have no friend

I learned to protect myself

I learned to speak up

I learned to be brutally honest even if it hurt.

So this I say to you my dear friend

If I hurt you

I’m sorry

For it is my nature to protect my heart and soul

In any way possible

I know that you may not want to hear this right now

Or Even read this letter

But I pray that you do

And that you forgive me for anything I have done

I hope that you can love me unconditionally

I hope you can be my friend with a whole heart

And understand where I’m coming from

Because where I’m coming from

Will always be a place where you will be welcomed

And you will always have a friend in me

I miss you.