this sux
i'm so down, i hate everything, and i feel so alone...
Jewel Safe House
With doors to lock
Only trouble
Is the lonely child
Sitting in emptiness
Sitting in the dark
Sittin with a broken heart
Sitting... all alone

and that's all i guess

No Idea??!?!?
I am a slave today, cleaning and obeying.
Whatever! I just want to say, I have no idea why I write these blogs.. no 1 will see them.. I guess it's just a chance to write into a "journal".. i used to do it.. but nothing seems important to write about. Except .. I want to say that I apreciate those who tell the truth and those who can show emotions by telling me how they feel or their opinion of me. Sometimes critisism is good.

"You can't please all of the people some of the time, you can't please some of the people all of the time, and you can't please all of the people all of the time... but you can please some of the people some of the time." - Quote of the day

-m.

It All Falls Down
Well, i'm not going to say much.. just going to tell you about that "party" i went to.. lol. Well when i got back from my bore'n movie, and bore'n family thing.. i went over to see Amanda about the party. It kinda looked like it was over (no cars or anything, maybe it was going to be a small party?!) Well I got there and Amanda was cleaning up. I ask her, "dude what happened", she replies.. "My uncle came and busted the party!" .. like holly shit!! Yup.. well the party didn't end there, people kept comm'n back and her uncle(s) kept on kicking them out.. but later that night it was about 20-30 people left.. just chillin and shit. The worst part is that Spencer is in soooo much shit, he was such a fuckin' ass to his uncle, and his uncle got into some fights 2, so Spencer will never hear the end of this. Yeh, and last night, (sorry for the lack of entries), Spencer had more people over... it was ok tho, not like the night before with the 100 people (sluts and dumbass people).. yeh, n e ways, thats about it.. and for yesterday - HAPPY BIRTHDAY PISSANT!

later dayz ;)
-m.

Suckass! - - - or not??!!?
Suckass is a word me and my brother created to say how sucky something is. Well today is a suckass day! Let me tell you .. first I got up, did nothing. Then went on the internet and made some plans.. figuring i could avoid a party my neighbour is having. I just want some peace and quite. But the person I was going to the movies with couldn't go (no prob I understand).. it was just a bummer for me.. now i'm going to the movies, alone., i tried to talk to (nameless person) u know.. just to see if he wanted to go.. well he ignored me. Nice friends ah? oh well, after i go to the movies, imma play some cards with a bunch of relatives.. then go to that party and have some fun! woop woo! so yeh.. maybe my day won't be so bad.. lets find out!

p.s. -I love you all ; even those who ignore me or can't hang out / peace out!

-m.

Why Is It So Hard?
Part I - Yesterday

I believe life as we know it has gone down the drain! Why is it that when someone wants to be themselves, others just break them apart and throw them to the curb! I'm talking about how no one is this millenium has the courrage to be different - or respect those who are! I don't know why i'm soo stressful upon this subject. I just realized today that I can never be "normal" (but what is normal??) and that I'm way to flitzy! I can never make a goddamn decision! Anyways, that's my view of the day. Hope it clears things up for some of you.

p.s - I bombed my Math exam today!! ... what a surprise!

Part II - Today

Today went alot better then yesterday! I am now retracting the flitzy comment because I have made my decision about a certain somebody. I am so stocked that I want to go out tonight and party it up! lol, but the fact that everyone has plans all ready makes my night a living bomb! ah well.. maybe next time. Well, i just have to share with the world that I had a beautiful "kodack" moment today.. yup, and it was as long as maybe 5 seconds..lol, but it was worth it! Well, i'll maybe devulge into this another day.. but for now - PARTY TIME!

-m.