Alright I was going to start with the presidential election, but it seems Angelfire's web page editors have to make you log-in when you hit the preview button and you lose all of your work. Nice job, dumb fucks. 10 points
Ok, the presidential election this year has been turned into the worlds biggest pissing contest. Bush won 3 times already. Do we see a pattern here? No? Ten points for you, buddy.
Some slack-jawed yokel went hunting and decided to tie a rope to his gun and pull it up to the tree stand. The ass tied the rope to the trigger and blew off his nuts. People like that shouldn't reproduce anyway. 10 points.
It seems we are such a lazy society we can't flush automatic flushing toilets. If it doesn't work, there's a button you push. If you can't push a button I'd hate to see the agony you go through pushing a small lever. 10 points. I don't want to see your feces anymore.
Some dick decided to take it upon himself to test the durability of a bullet proof vest. This guy, who we'll call "Dumbass", put on the vest and had his friend shoot him with a handgun. Since the moron survived, Dumbass shoved a phone book between himself and the vest, and had his friend attempt to kill him with a shot gun. Dumbass is now in the hospital with 3 broken ribs. 10 points? You bet!
A woman had her ex-husband arrested for waving to his kids. Out in public, minding his own business,
gives a friendly wave to his own children. I can't believe the cops were stupid enough to arrest him. 10 points, mother fucker.
Speaking of cops, the Philadelphia police thought it would be fun to ride my ass and flash their highbeams at me. Seeing the word "POLICE" spelled across the front of the van, I went off an exit to pull over for him. He kept going along the highway. 3 lanes to choose from, 2 cars on the road and he has to flash his highbeams to get around me. If he only had a brain. 10 points
The existance of boy bands is a crime against humanity. Only in America do we ignore true artists and base our taste on a pretty face. Ugh, it makes me sick. The music is so rotten I'd rather suck on the exhaust pipe of my car than listen to it. 10 points.
Remember the milliom Mom march? There was this woman crying to the president because her son died fooling around with a gun. She wanted to know what he was going to do about it. I don't think every idiot should own a gun jusst because the constitution says we have the right. I think this woman should be put behind bars on charges of neglect. If you have a gun in the house and your child gets killed because of it, it shows how irresponsible you are. Why hasn't anyone thought of this yet? 10 points.
People blaming violence on TV. Hey people, violence was going on when man first walked the earth, and any old man will tell you there was no TV. Violence is caused by idiots. This is so stupid it makes me want to hit someone. Damn it all. 10 points.
Software companies pissing you off? It seems all of the latest upgrades are the worst pieces of crap. Does nothing work today? Master the 4 slice toaster before you go play with a computer. 10 Points
Today I learned that the DMV gives out drivers licences to apes. This woman tried to get to a Mr. Sub by cutting in front of me at a red light. She took a right turn off the intersection I was waiting to go through. There wasn't enough room and she backed up a whole line of traffic behind her. Completely ignoring the fact that if she had gone straight through the intersection and turning into the parking lot would be more sensible. I've included this drawing to help explain.
I've got something to go along with the DMV (or the MVA as we call it here in Maryland). Apes are just 'given' liscenses. I was up at the MVA with my friend while he was getting his Deleware liscense switched to a Maryland one, and some old woman was taking the vision test. I had to hear the lady say W V G A, twenty-five times. The lady giving the test just kept reapeating, "No ma'am, the bottom line of letters." Finally she got it right after 20 minutes. Then the old lady was asked to tell her what side the
blinking red light was on, and the old lady swore that there was no blinking light. Finally the lady giving the test just passed her. 10 points for the old lady and 10 more for the lady giving the test. Thanks for keeping the roads safe, dumbass!
Brought to you by Mike The Giant.
More failures at driving... I was sitting in a parking lot across from a McDonalds when a guy in a van tried pull into the exit. The driveway goes in a circle around the building so you go in one side and out the other. Though this wasn't the worst of it. After realizing he was going in the out hole he started driving down the wrong side of the road to get to the in hole. He must be starving or stupid to want to go to McDonalds so bad. My guess is stupid 10 points.
I'm a college student and I have an english class where we discuss things. We were having a discussion on cloning after reading a few articles about it. In the middle of the discussion someone blurted out "Mice ain't got no bones, yo!" It is beyond me how someone this stupid can not be legally retarded. I'm sure the drugs he's on isn't a big help either.10 points for him and 20 for his parents because I can imagine how stupid they must be.
I just had a mental breakdown watching a commercial. There's a Nike sommerial that is the worst thing I've ever seen. The person on the left says "B", then the one on the right says "OING". Then together they say "BOING". They do this over and over again like five times and say "good, again". They do it again and show the worst looking shoes ever. Am I going to have to spend the rest of my life barefoot or buy an overpriced shoe that looks like a space shuttle? 20 point for these guys. 10 for making bad commercials and 10 for bad shoes.
I called Pizza Hut, gave them my address and phone number, placed an order for delivery. About an hour and a half later, still no food. So I called them back, and that's when they decided to tell me they didn't deliver to my area. The assholes have my number, but they'd rather let me starve than call me back and tell me they're not coming. 10 points for the dickheads who are too lazy to make a simple phone call.The government has passed a law stating that the holes in swiss cheese must be no larger than a certain size. The government. Regulating cheese holes. Nuff said. 10 points.
I went outside to the parking lot of the apartment building which I live in to get my car to head out to get food. Not only is the parking lot full of people who have parked there for Bingo in the building next store, but some dumb bitch parked sideways right in front of me, blocking me in. So eventually I got into the building holding the Bingo, a place which housed some of the dirtiest, scumiest looking people I've seen in my life, and had them make an announcement to get the jackass to move their car. The owner of the car, never looking up or making an attempt to get up to move the car, raised her hand. Instead of moving it herself, the fat bitch had an employee move the car for her. "Goddamit! I paid a whole dollar for this Bingo card! I ain't givin this shit up for nuthin, yo!" 10 points for the lack of common sense it takes to not know enough to *not* park illegally in front of another car, and 10 more for being such a lazy fuck. Oh, I've also included some pictures for visual aid.
Telcom Students Get Fucked Again!
As if going through an entire semester of teachers who couldn't teach wasn't bad enough the scheduling problems this semester have left the students bent over anticipating the loss of their anal virginity. Not only do they randomly change the classrooms, they fail to notify more than one student. I'm not even going to go into the details of how many times this happened and the amount of frustration it caused. Just giving 50 points to the person responsible for notifying the students of the change and scheduling it wrong it the first damn place.
So, down in South Carolina, all men are currently required, by state law, to grow beards to celebrate some ass-backwards special day in Hick-History. Any man caught not growing a beard will be forced to pay a fine and serve a jail sentence. FOR THE LOVE OF CHRIST! This is the kind of thing they think of in South Carolina??? If that doesn't warrant 10 points, nothing does. But this does, so we're still ok. 10 points, bitch.
So in the grocery store where I work, there are 2 automatic doors: one to go in, the other to go out. Each door is clearly labeled, in case a moron tries to go out the wrong door, with a sign saying "DO NOT ENTER". However, one of the scholars of Watervliet walked up to the door and, ignoring the sign, spent nearly a full minute attempting to pull the door open, eventually getting it wide enough to squeeze through. If only the people of Watervliet were literate, perhaps this display of stupidity could have been avoided.
Working in customer service one night, I had a customer come up to the desk attempting to return meat she said was rotten. "I got it two weeks ago", the lady declared. I opened the bag to find a slab of GREEN MEAT which had expired OVER 3 MONTHS AGO. When I refused to give her a refund, she demanded I let her talk to the meat manager, who proceeded to laugh in her face. Bought it two weeks ago, huh? Nice try, jack ass. 10 points for this ass.
Over the last 2 weeks, Price Chopper (the grocery store where I work) has had the police sent in 3 times. Apparently, some jack ass has been calling 911 and telling them that there is a bomb in the store. As if it isn't stupid enough to call in fake bomb threats, the fuck-head called 911 to report it. What's the first thing 911 does? TRACE THE CALL. We've entered a new level of stupidity, people. Brace yourselves. This one easily deserves 20 points.
Really, just click this link. There is no need for an explanation. This is an immediate 10 points. If you don't agree, then we'll add another 10 just for the fact that you are retarded.
One day while working at Burger King I was listening to a woman give us her order. First I hear "do you have the drinks with the white stuff in it?" What they have are frozen floats which is a frozen drink with vanilla ice cream on the bottom. Since we changed from blue to red someone gave the woman an explanation for the change in color of the frozen beverage. Then she says "What's the vanilla?" What goes through my mind is "white stuff, vanilla. white stuff, vanilla... YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THAT DIDN'T MAKE SENSE?!?!?!" I really need a new job. 10 points.
Here's a complicated one. If you are ever heading north on I-287 in NJ get off (I beleive it's exit 46, if not close to there) for Booton? NJ. Assume it's 1 AM and the only thing open there to get a quick meal is Dunkin' Donuts. You go there and come out and HOLY JESUS I'M LOST! Yes indeed they hide the highway from you. All there are the entire length of the road are signs for 287 south, which doesn't really help if you're going north. After yelling, swearing and driving like a maniac I found it. It's there, either they really want to fuck with you or they just never realized it might be difficult if you're not from here to find the highway, jeez maybe we should put up a sign or something. 10 points. I heard on the news awhile ago about this woman who flushed the toilet of an airplane while she was still sitting on the seat. Needless to say it sucked her ass pretty good and she got stuck. That's not the worst of it though. A few days ago I found out that it was my psycology teacher! hahahahaha! I thought to myself "That was you!? You're going on the ten points page!" 10 points for Dr.Hopper hahahahahahahahahaPop up ad's on webpages are dumb on their own. I hope to rid my page of them someday. This one in particular got me. click here Now I ask: If you looked how could you not find it?! You really need someone else to check? the fuck? yeah 10 points
I was reading a message board on Audio Galaxy today and the subject is "THEY MIGHT BE FAGGOTS!" Aren't we clever? NO! NOT REALLY! And he goes on to say that TMBG doesn't deserve to be on Audio Galaxy. I think he deserves to eat powedered bleach and die but it's not going to happen. If hear a band that's horrible I will bash it here and not go and piss off people who like it directly. If they have bad taste what is one to do? 10 points for the post though.
The ATM at my bank has a feature called "Account Transfer", which can be used to transfer money from your checking account to your savings. After trying repeatedly to get it to work, I went in and talked to one of the bank employess, who informed me that this feature does not work with this bank. Who's the asshole that installs the feature at THIS BANK, when the feature does not work for accounts with THIS BANK? You're uselessness has cost the world another 10 points.
