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Reviews for Legend of Zelda: OoT

JEFF's Review

What is the matter with everybody on this planet??? People all over the globe giving this game perfect tens and saying it is a flawless game. I think I know why. Mr. Miyamoto has made such great Mario and Zelda games in the past, and people were anticipating this game sooo much so that when they bought this game, they were in complete denial. "This game is great!" they say, in disbelief because this game wasn't near as good as it should have been. They are all in denial. I anticipated the arrival of this game to U.S. shores like the next RPG lover, but what a mess! Sure the graphics are absolutely gorgeous to look at, but GRAPHICS ARE NOT A FACTOR IN A GAME'S FUN FACTOR. Graphics are definitely NOT everything, and this game is a perfect example of what I am talking about. It's all about execution. And the game's objectives' execution did not make this game fun. Going from area to area was too much of a chore...i never had fun playing this game.

Let me start from the beginning. When I first started up this game, I got excited by the intro. The graphics were great. But then the background music began to play, and I was wondering where the classic music was. "Hmmph...maybe I'll hear it later." I thought. Nope...never heard it. The music was mostly new, with the exception of the Fairy's Theme and the theme for Kakariko Village. Those songs are good but....not even the original overworld song returned...what a HUGE dissappointment. Well that decreased my excitement level a couple notches.

The...uhm...."unique" storyline didn't help at all either. Hardly entertaining. See Ness's Review for a description of the "edge of your seat" storyline. This game is quite a pathetic attempt at achieving anything groundbreaking (except the graphics), and the jokes are VERY corny too (like your fairy Navi crashing into a fence...wow...I can't...stop....laughing....). Well so far there is: No classic Zelda music, a horrible storyline, and corny jokes...Well we arent getting off to a good start here. That's not a very good sign.

Lets see...the sound is bad too....there is no audio in this game to enjoy! Link shouting things like "SKANK!" and his ridiculous screaming when falling off a cliff: "UWOOOOOAHHHHHHH!!!" Oh please. When did Link become such a wuss? He USED to be cool in the 8-bit days...but now...he's gotten a bad reputation off of this game. I really can't figure out who would enjoy a game like this...where you are an elf type thing with long, pierced ears; Link is officially NOT cool.

Now for some things that.....just aren't...right. Whenever you walk into Kakariko Village you are welcomed by the peaceful music and the peaceful surroundings. And when you walk into a house (without knocking, mind you, not like they care.....for...some reason...), you see pretty much fat women cooking or busying themselves. But when you talk to those fat women, they spin around to face you, and you see that THE FAT WOMEN IN KAKARIKO VILLAGE HAVE BEARDS!!!! As soon as I saw this, all interest in this game was down the toilet. I yelled and turned off my 64 in complete horror. What posessed Mr. Miyamoto to do such an evil thing? Ugh.....moving on.

So naturally you would exit the house and roam around Kakariko Village looking to find something that would end your traumatization. You round a corner to find PROFESSIONAL CARPENTERS PRANCING AROUND THE VILLAGE!!! Skipping along while flailing their arms!! What is up with this!?!?!?!? So you back away from this town and get the h*ll outta there before you become even more traumatized. I just don't see how people could give this gme a ten after seeing the obvious homosexuality and the "drag king" look going on. Ugh...moving on to yet even more horror.

After fighting baddies off and killing a couple bosses, you realize that your heart level is dangerously low. You know this by the annoying beeping that never goes away until you get a couple more hearts. So you walk over to one of those Fairy Caves to be fully revitalized. You walk over to the sacred triange symbol, toot on your ocarina of time, and from the pool of water emerges a BUTT UGLY FAIRY!!! Fairies were supposed to be beautiful, but not these fairies. They scream at the top of the lungs when they see you (I thought it was a witch at first...SERIOUS!) for no apparent reason, and they look at you with their extremely frightening face and refill your health. Like you haven't been scared enough already. There are other "different" events that take place in this game such as these...but I'm about to throw up just thinking about it. BUYER'S BEWARE!!! RENT FIRST (if you dare.....)!


Graphics: 10% of 10%

Sound: 6% of 10%

Gameplay: 21% of 30%

Control: 18% of 20%

Lasting Appeal: 6% of 10%

Fun Factor: 9% of 20%

Overall: 70% out of 100%


POO's Review

Hmmm.....Zelda... Sounds like it would make a good 64 game, right? Wrong.

First of all, the graphics are the best i've ever seen in all of the N64's game library. There are some points where Link can mysteriously teleport from the abyss of falling down a trench to safety. Also, the fact that you can toggle the camera to behind your back whenever you want using the Z-button is a nice add-on, but when walking through winding hallways, the feature becomes a hassle.

Also, there's the really neat feature about the a-button which switched to be many feature, talk, read, jump...etc. But, there's always a 'but' for these features, sometimes you can want to jump yet talk to a person.

Oh yea....then...::shudders::...there's Navi. The producers must have been smokin/drinkin sumthin reeeeel good when they thought up Navi. Well, obviously you have to have a bright annoying fly that shouts words at you "HEY!" "LOOK!".

There are a lot of puzzles in the game, some of which are worth trying. Then theres Link. Ahhhh...what can we say about Link... Seems he's developed a talent for shouting words like Navi. "Skank!"....hmm.....gotta say skank.... Maybe he's cursing at the princess who he has to go through all of this for? Or maybe he's mistaken Ganon for a lady......hmm...we'll never know.

For all of its hype that was generated (being the 'best' game and all) it forgot one crucial part in making it a good Zelda game: the music. The music of Zelda 64 is cr@ptacular and is so....*cough*....good.... Take a very good look at the game underneath the graphics before you consider buying this sad failure.


Graphics: 10% of 10%

Sound: 5% of 10%

Gameplay: 25% of 30%

Control: 16% of 20%

Lasting Appeal: 5% of 10%

Fun Factor: 10% of 20%

Overall: 71% out of 100%







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