THE NEWEST SW:TCG SITE ON THE WEB
HOMEPAGE DREAM CARDS ARTICLES DECK DESIGNS LINKS E-MAIL
DISCLAIMER:This story was created by members of the message boards at Rebelbasers.com. We posted in a Randomness Thread, where you were only allowed to post one word per post. Then, the words would create sentences. This story is continuing to be posted even right now. This is the latest copy of the story. Some of the original version on the message board makes little sense, so I have edited it with my own words to make the story seem more interesting. WARNING: Some parts of the story are WEIRD, but FUNNY. The authors are listed at the bottom of this story.
Now on to the story...
A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...
Vader looked like an Elvis clone, covered with
glaze in a blender that ate coal, in the nude. Meanwhile, midgets exploded near
Jabba’s huge belly only to find clonetroopers jumping happily in upside-down
cookie jars. Chewbacca repaired Salacious Crumb and flew frantically to Hoth only to
find Tusken Raiders.
Again, Darth Maul sat staring at stupid people who weren’t posting one word at a time. They didn’t care because reality stopped stopping unreality. Luke dove under the black cookie jar looking for vibrator parts for battle. Oddly, Luke hallucinated about Rebel stormtroopers with pet Gungans. Meanwhile, Gigglesticks slapped Han in the face.
Boxes sang Erie tunes to laugh. Gigantic hellos blared from hell-speakers, once Mom’s eyebrows melted. Suddenly, in the bathroom, Gooberfish-killing resounded and a Gooberfish died.
Banana Rebublic Banditos slapped away into cheese dip. Hutt-like fanboys got a life. Meanwhile, nerfish Ewoks whimpered into a bong. Blaster Rifles open-fired sweetly, dismembering Ewoks gently. Finally, lightsabers couldn’t control drunken Gooberfish.
Afterwards, Kit Fisto massaged the Jawa cloaks seductively while looking down droid pants. Everyday, Yoda went searching madly for love toys. After Sabe’ ate chili-cheese-fries with Juicy Juice at Naboo-Mart, she ate Bantha overstock and burped out grapes. Lando laked butter melts slowly like orange Orcs stinking freakishly of poodoo from Dextster. Jettster’s fat ass exploded messily and quickly, while Yoda frantically meditated on a new sentence.
Sith Weasels drank anti-pregnancy pills. Gay people said that Mace Windu frequently went up yours. Yaddle saw Padme fiddle with Anakin’s lightsaber.
“Salacious Crumb’s little…” said Yoda’s padawan J’ai Syn.
J’ai Syn explained about the shenanigans about there not being anymore pillows. Meanwhile, Boba lived in some place slimy. So how would he make lightsabers malfunction?
Darth Maul pumped his throttle a little too much. Padme’s mom was fascinated with crackers that had cheese up her lightsaber. The lightsaber slipped and sliced her do-hickey that kept her trousers full of cheese. Then she wept profusely. Padme flew over Coruscant naked while Anakin kissed a fly.
Mace shoved mountains up his butt and then went to the bathroom at your mother’s house. The Bespin Ice-Cream-Maker man scratched his butt while Emperor Otter-Pop ate fried chicken, along with spam. Obi-Wan Kenobi licked Padme’s leg to annoy Jabba and Zam Wessel.
Netcoyboy chose not to spam because he thought it was uncool. Besides, Netcowboy rules! Momentum was not withstanding. It was significantly awesome, but rapped poorly because grammatically speaking, it was always cold.
Rambo shot his nephew, although he wasn’t a nice thing to eat. 2-1B thought that by eating the poodoo, the Jedi heads tended not to suffer greatly. As long-nosed Kubaz-eaters kept their crap in the closet, other mental rejects were prone to have little Sarlaccs.
Aayla went out to order at Denny's new Grand paino-playing restaurant. Jedi Jar Jar Binks decided to snack on Frito-lays, while the Sith Moron ran inside to use the toilet. Gas fumed out of the Sith Moron’s ears as he left the toilet. The gas ran down into the mouth of a Gungan warrior.
Wookiees ate hotdogs when the Nexu jumped upside-down into pools of filth. The cheerleader ruthlessly spat on another cheerleader’s pompom that flew over a Dug’s sandwhich that was covered in guacamole and cheese. The faction of four Bespin Raiders With Big Hats attacked the stupid Sith Lords from New York City. Slave I flew into the Rancor’s gaping crapper, which was full of poodoo.
Admiral Ackbar’s crap flew over the Nexu’s head because crap is made of crap. Darth Maul and Darth Vader once took a crap because they crappity crapped. Crap squeezed tightly because it was sticky and crappy.
Spelunking has always not been good for the way Allen eats. Jedi Master Kenobi watched the holonet while eating. The descendant of Jek Porkins ate a lot of rotten fish. Meanwhile, Jedi Master Windu was bein’ a bad mothah, “Shut yo’ mouth!”
Yoda smelled like chicken while Chewbacca ate salmon. Luke used his lightsaber to kill Darth Vader.
“Master Yoda is short,” said Darth Vader as he was struck down by Luke.
Kessel was the planet where Han met his friend. Han’s zebra kicked madly at General Veers, who was eating salmon at the time. The salmon smelled like large fish. Meanwhile, Darth Maul sat down on sharpened salad tongs. The salad tongs blew over salad dressing on a lightsaber that malfunctioned, killing the Sith.
Chancellor Vallorum played SW:TCG while the Trekkies screamed “AFLAC!” Rebels sucked on Rancor toes. The implementation was not acceptably completed according to schedule. Australia required twice as much worse firepower as the men could aim high. The men went to an AOL party that was very boring. Potatoes tasted like badly shaken giants, while pirates became smaller than banana-butt-midgets that wore thongs.
The banana-butt-midgets said, “Look! It’s a turd! Hey, have a cow Osama Bin Laden!” They said this because he was a bad taco and deserved some spankings, served with chalupas. The Taco Grande was very smelly and big. Fun threads wove left and right like demented trucks. Super Yoda was short, but stout. Playing SW:TCG was a big difference in the amount of things that were won using strategy.
Naboo Diplomats are stupid. Anakin likes soft kittens that wiz everywhere, gesticulating. Cookies are covered with meat. We are Star Wars fans. Every time someone dances, I throw up every time I dance. The Sith cry like the idiots they are for hours because they ate scum. The unconscious ferrets died. Meanwhile, Lord Jar Jar learned how to fart.
Geonosians attacked the wall. Suddenly, Yoda got smart and used gumdrops and lightsabers on the toilet. Yoda said, "Dolls suck. Got crap? I know I can kick Sith ass, but my toothbrush is somewhat sharper than my toenails." Yoda's head swelled to an enormous size.
Godzilla fell down from attacking the droids, while Gooberfish rocked the joint. Godzilla's mom told him how to play the bono-phone like her big hairless fat smelly pussy-cat, also roughly like her sand-papery flaky scalp. Godzilla said, "I hate purple dinosaurs!"
Jabba listened to techno while sniffing Juri Juice from a Jedi's belt-sander. Once upon the moon, Jabba went for a jack knife, so he went crazy. Meanwhile, Jedi ate chocolate strawberries while they killed puppies with poison lawn-darts. Ducks slept with fat Gooberfish hoodjobbies and ugly Ghandars. That was a lie, they actually slept with Rancors.
A duck died once spam encircled it completely. This helped immoblize Obi-Wan, and Yoda really loves pot. However, he never afganastanimated himself. Now Yoda is upset at Gooberfish caretakers because they stole his cookies. The Wookiees wanted hairbrushes. Meanwhile, Randomness threads were very, very odd.
Afganastanimation was really quite literally a fake pile of bad smelling Rancor crap. Chewbacca liked eating raw Gooberfish because Tatooine was cool. One more word about ducks brought apocalyptic consequences that destroyed everything that swam. Meanwhile, Duck Vader swallowed calzones because he could not live under such type while being stupid.
Meanwhile, Ewoks couldn't jump over Trekkies, but dogs bit the Wookiees after they crapped out of their shells. Midgets were working on an Uber-Jedi who cried a lot for bacon-bits. Boba and Jango went trolling together. Yavin mountains were extremely smelly when they exploded. Meanwhile, Lama Su ate a lot of nasty Sith.
Optimus Prime ran after Darth Bane because he stole mangos from porcupines habitually. Meanwhile, Jedi ate a lot of Kiwi birds. Boba Fett ate Jango's homemade casserole and vomited. Meanwhile, George W. Bush drukenly fell over dead. However, Dick Cheney became a mad individual who ate Jabba-O's for breakfast. Astroids became bigger after toasting in a Jacuzzi. Count Dooku ate slime-covered peanuts. Everyone wondered why Palpatine played with Padme's luscious puppy that ate fish.
Authors List coming as soon as I can comprise a list of the many message board posters who contributed to this Randomness Thread story.