This is my life as I see, it doesn't seem real,
But it's happening to me.
I see it go by, as if I were dead,
No, emotions are fake, they're all in my head.
Then why do I feel I just want to die,
And why are these feelings so maddening inside,
They make me break down, and force me to cry,
Only to spawn a greater rage inside.
A rage at the sight of a tear being shed,
From my own very eyes, no, it's all in my head.
And this hurt that is tearing me up inside,
It feels as if I have already died.
And it feels my heart has been ripped from my chest,
And when I sob, its as if I'm taking my last breath,
But one day the tears will cease to fall.
And I know I will have learned from it all,
What I thought couldn't be, the thing I do dread,
What I denied for so long, despite what I said.
I said I'd never be alone, couldn't happen to me,
But now I look at it, and what do I see.
Alone and in tears, my very worst fear,
Those who talked down to me were right over the years.
I'll never mean anything and die alone in my bed,
Miserable and lonely inside of my head.
It never sank who who was really there,
And it never clicked who really did care,
But I realize I am just wishing as I lay in this bed,
They never cared, .....no, it's all in my head.