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# ~ # ~ # ~ # ~# ~ # ~# ~ # ~# ~ # ~# ~ # ~# ~ Published by Ken & Lynette Chandler ************ + + + + + + + ****************** Refer a friend to Crossing Borders! Click to
Recommend-It! Going to see your sweetheart? We’ll help you get a
good fare/package! + + + + + + + + + + + + + So what am I doing to occupy myself? LOTS! Working very hard on the business and tearing my hair out over a new design for our website. I like change can you tell? :) Next week, we’ll be going for another ultrasound and we can’t wait to see how she’s changed since the last ultrasound. We’re all real anxious for her to get there. Maybe she’ll come on Labor Day… how befitting. Till the next issue, take care and God Bless. ~Lynette Chandler + + + + + + + + + In the very first issue of Crossing Borders, I published a story titled “The Truth About Culture Shock”. To read it, go here www.angelfire.com/ok2/kenandlynette/cb/1.html. Back then, I was in the thick of it and was feeling absolutely disillusioned. In my mind, culture shock is something over rated and happens to others, NOT me. I bet many others feel the same way too. A quick review, culture shock is a process we ALL go through when we relocate. It has very distinct characteristics starting from an emotional high when you first arrive. These later turns into a form of depression when you seem to despise everything about the new environment and then finally, when we start to accept the situation and settle in, the depression lifts and you mould yourselves into your new life and everything is normal again. This process usually takes about a year. After 18 months of being here, what do I say? I am over it! When I wrote that article in the depths of culture shock, I disliked everything about being here, resisted any way I could and felt totally sorry for myself. Now having settled in, a small circle of acquaintances, a wonderful husband and a work to think about. Life seems so good! So if you have recently come here and are feeling down, not sure how to handle yourself in public, angry at everything and just not being yourself, remember it is normal. ***************** A lot times throughout the year I truly have Ken to thank. American spouses, you need to be super supportive. That is the only way. When your spouse is going through culture shock, some of the things we say do or not say or do tend to hurt. Things that you find is perfectly all right and normal is not to your spouse and he/she may criticize it (even bitterly). This can be tough but you need to remember that this is NOT personal. We are simply trying to reconcile and find our place. Explain things to them as best as you can and if at that moment, they can’t accept it, lay off and let it rest. There will come a time when he/she will be less resistant, usually once they pull out of culture shock. As for those of us who are new here, be patient with yourselves. There is no use beating yourself up over this because you WILL pull through this and life WILL eventually return to something you’ll be comfortable with though it will never be exactly the same as before. You will also never lose your culture, your identity and the sense of who you are. That will always be there no matter how many American habits you adopt or how long you stay, so don’t fight it and chins up! **************************************************************************** |
